So, I know it’s been a while since I’ve been on here. There’s been lots of life stuff between now and then. I’ve been working on getting my life in order, trying to ditch my issues with lust in general and to not to be so sexually obsessive. It’s hard being single and horny mid-to-late 20s, but I’m trying to be content. I came back here for the community and not the erotica, which I’m trying to avoid, though I’m not judging anyone else on here.
What I’ve really been trying to do lately is get my professional life in order too so that I can one day get married and support a spouse. I finally landed a full-time job as a landscaper. The pay is good, but it’s hard work. The only problem is that we are in the middle of a pandemic, so meeting other people is hard right now. And meeting single women with whom I gel well in interests and beliefs is even harder. So I guess I’m kind of emotionally venting a little.
I want to be in a stable place to get married. I want to experience sexual intimacy and closeness beyond belief. But right now, God is teaching me patience, and it’s hard—even harder coming off a long term long-distance relationship. My last girlfriend thinks she’s on the asexual spectrum, so she just doesn’t feel the same for me and wants me to have someone who desires me as much as I do them. We are still good friends, but that’s one direction my life isn’t going anymore, which is a bit of a downer.
So if you can, say a prayer for me. Masturbation seems to hold off that loneliness, but I long for something deeper if that makes sense. I don’t want to go back into that dark place of porn after my first break up. (I’m even using an image blocker on here because I don’t need to see “Everything”. 😛)
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