Nudity in Marriage

My wife and I got married young, and we both had hopes for our marriage that we didn’t tell each other and perhaps hadn’t really admitted to ourselves. One of my hopes was that we would be nude together a lot, get all-over tans, go to nude beaches, and do nude dares. I also hoped she would be someone who playfully pushed boundaries—wore revealing clothing, was bold and inventive in what she wore or didn’t… and many things like this. Generally, I dreamed of a very active and creative sex life and lots of cool clothes!

When we married, I discovered she had a lot of worry, shame, and disapproval around sex and her body. She was fearful of what other people might think if they found out she was wearing a G-string, had been to a nude beach, wasn’t wearing a bra or had on a short skirt, sunbathed nude in the back yard, liked sex, or whatever.

Also, she didn’t feel like my equal physically. She didn’t feel sexy, and she saw me as in a league way above her in looks and sex appeal (which isn’t true). And she has always said she is very sexually attracted to me, but she has found it hard to be sexually playful or provocative or confident. She knows I’m very sexual and loves that about me, gets turned on seeing me nude at the beach, or whatever, but she doesn’t feel able to meet me in that space.

The result of this has been that I’ve felt kind of lonely with her over the years—there was so much I couldn’t share with her, and so much fun we couldn’t have. We’ve worked on this a lot for many years now. I’ve especially tried to help her feel absolutely great about her body, and I’ve had to learn to accept and love her as she is, just as Christ loved me! We have both grown enormously over the 30-plus years of our marriage, and we’ve recently done many wonderfully sexy things together that could never have happened before. Yet I still have a sense of loss, and I hope there is still time for us.

Thinking back over the years, I find my desires haven’t changed that much! I’d still love to spend extended time with her nude, just doing normal stuff at home—gardening, cleaning, cooking. That doesn’t seem possible given our living situation, and she’s not particularly into it. But I’d love it! How can this happen? Currently, I only see her nude briefly before sex. It just seems an absolute tragedy that, in modern life, we can’t enjoy each other’s bodies throughout the day. We should get to see each other in all kinds of positions and moving in different ways and be able to touch skin to skin. Surely we were created for this. I believe we were meant to see nude bodies as a daily, normal thing. The absence of this probably has a negative effect on our marriages and our lives in general. One great thing about nude bodies is how relaxing and sensual they are to look at, and of course, it’s relaxing and sensual to be naked.

To me, it would be an absolutely wonderful gift if she was able or willing to be more generous with her body, happy to spend time nude at home or on the beach. I love for her to take many opportunities to strip down or to wear very revealing clothing, even send me nude photos.  I wish she could realise just how much I would love spending time with her nude, and seeing her nude in many different places, like going for a hike, lying in the sun, swimming, walking on the beach., gardening, etc.

One of my hopes would be for her to say to me, “I’ll wear as little as you want me to – or nothing – any time you want.” To me that is seriously sexy! We went on a little picnic today in an isolated place, and I was thinking how hot it would be if she said to me, “Would you like me to be naked here?’” and then removed her clothes, and was completely relaxed, enjoying her body. And wouldn’t it be great if she then said, “Would you like me to walk back to the car nude and stay nude until we get to a busy road?” Or, of course, if she just did that—no need to ask!

I also love the idea of dares, like, “Let’s drive to the beach with you nude, stay nude the whole time on the beach, and return home nude,” if she enjoyed that kind of thing. Of course, I would never force this or harass her to do it. But man, it’s so hot! For me, this kind of thing is such a gift. And yes, of course, we’d have to be thoughtful of others.

I’d love it if she worked out a way to dress so she could quickly remove her clothes and put them on again so that, if the opportunity arose, she could. It’s such a turn on to think that she would be thoughtful and willing like that. I really believe we’re meant to spend lots of time nude together, and of course, it encourages touch and leads to sex, which is even better! I guess, I’d love her to see being nude with me as a key facet of our relationship, something to prioritise. Like on a day off together, I’d love to know she’s thinking, “When can I get naked with him today? How can I show off my body for him? I know how much he loves that.”

Of course, I want to do things for her that I know she loves!

And I don’t see anything wrong with social nudity. Of course, we need to think about where, with whom, and when. I like the idea of others seeing my wife nude in the right context. I think its healing, and it helps build confidence and overcome shame. I’d really love her to be relaxed about being nude and not too concerned about being seen. It’s important to be wise about the context but not overly worried. I love the vibe of confidence.

Here are some other things I’d love: For us to have a cabin in the woods we could go to and spend a whole weekend nude. To have close friends with whom we could be comfortably nude. If she thought about how she could surprise me with sexy attire when we go out, especially on holidays away from people we know, and undo more and more buttons throughout the night. For her to take off her clothes in public places where no one is looking, like walking along the beach at twilight. Sleeping naked together and staying that way for breakfast on the back deck. To go sunbathing with her at a public beach, tucked out of sight, and for her to remove her clothes with me keeping watch. Spending time at a nude beach or resort with her and walking for miles without a stitch of clothing. I’d love her to push the boundaries of skimpy swimwear.

It would be great for her to be bold with this—I find boldness very attractive. It would be great if she had girlfriends with whom she could share some of this and inspire them to be bolder. She could even encourage our daughters to be bold with their husbands.

I love her to wear no underwear often. I’d like her to go topless on the beach or for a nude run with me somewhere in the wilderness. I’d love to go boating on a lake with her nude the whole time. I’d love her to read MarriageHeat and enjoy all the nude pictures without disapproval!

Mostly I’d love her to believe she is sexy and to realise how special all these things would be to me. And if none of this happens—all good, life is about so much more!

3.64 avg. rating (73% score) - 22 votes
27 replies
    • Beachlover Guy says:

      Do you get together with nudist friends or go to nude beaches as a single now? It felt awkward when I first tried it years ago, but everyone was accepting so I felt comfortable when I went as a single guy.

    • SecondMarge says:

      It was such a pleasure for him. I wish he was still here to explain it. It was like a shared appreciation of something you love. Probably also when someone in a group is turned on, it spreads to the others.

      I have not done anything since he passed. And of course now the beaches are closed and even travel is supposed to be for necessities only. I miss our friends and I believe they would love for me to visit them or go to the beach together. Not certain how I would feel being nude without my partner. Would I be able to be nude? Would I fit in? They certainly would make every attempt to make me feel good.

    • BillAnthony says:

      SecondMarge, I'm SO sorry to hear that your husband has passed! I know that you had a wonderful loving relationship. You are in my prayers.

  1. Bertie says:

    Stag, I can relate to all those desires. It was such a surprise to me after we were married at how uncomfortable my wife was about being being naked, feeling sexy, and confident in her sexuality. It's been a long journey and she has done things over the years I never thought she would. It is still a struggle at time and for many years I have grieved the absence of the kind of freedom, play, and sensuality that should seem natural between two people who deeply love each other.

    Glad you had a safe place to express your struggle. Keep loving her. Keep desiring her.

    • Stag-on-a-hill says:

      Cool picture! Hi Bertie. Thanks. Have you written about your journey on MH? I would love to hear more and compare notes. Maybe there are things we can learn from each other. My next step is to read to her some of the sexy stories I have written that express some of my hopes for what could be between us. It gives us a way to talk about things and share feelings. It's also a way I can enjoy that side of myself with her regardless of whether she feels she can try some things. It's great just knowing that she understands and appreciates these desires I have.

  2. Waiting Hardly says:

    This would truly be an idyllic way to live, for it is the way we were originally created to live! Shame is something we invented. God didn’t put shame on us. And Christ, the Second Adam, has restored that relationship with God. God called it “very good” and we should too! Thanks for the inspiring story!

  3. HeSaid-SheSaid says:

    So I think I hear you saying that you would like to see your wife nude then??? Sorry, just a little humour. I'm with you pal on this one. Reasons my wife does not strip down too often are: she is just plain too cold all the time; our kids are around all the time; she is worried about secretions.

  4. Tulsa says:

    My wife & I were much the opposite when we first married. She was the one who was OK with being naked and actually loved to be naked outdoors. It made her horny, and I sure liked that. She was more enthusiastic about sex outdoors and had better orgasms too. That was enough to where I got to like it too. Now, it’s something we do!

    As far as being naked with other people or on a nude beach, although we did try that a little with a couple we know who likes that scene and frequents nude beaches, we are not much into it. We tried it here at our place with them, with hilarious results, and decided we would not head to the beaches!

    • Beachlover Guy says:

      What happened that made being nude with your friends hilarious? Most of the time, we're just comfortable with other nudists, but sometimes it's awkward, if the people are new to it. Both my wife and I have average, middle-50s bodies, but it's still a sensual delight to be nude with others.

    • Tulsa says:

      Well, the first problem was I had just got back from a remote job I was on for 6 weeks. I told all that this nudity test was not a good plan right now.
      It was OK to begin with, until we went for a dip in the pool. We got out, and I couldn’t help but notice my wife’s hard nipples, the water running off them, which, caused something else to get hard. (I’m a breast guy….no control)
      I tried to cover up with a towel. Fail. It just made the spontaneous situation more noticeable, pitched the old tent, so to speak.
      Anyway, after being without for so long, my erection did not go away.

    • Stag-on-a-hill says:

      Have you written about your experiences on MH? How over time you adjusted to you wife’s difference to you… changed how you thought? I’d love to know

    • Tulsa says:

      I’m not much of a writer Stag. Better with numbers.
      I never had a problem being naked really, just not wandering around the house, or outside, and certainly not around other couples or women. Since getting naked outside always seemed to make her jump my bone, I am all in with it now. 🙂 Most couples head to the bedroom. If the weather is good, we head outside!
      But, at a nude beach, or, like I said, around another couple, I think I’ll still pass! I was brave enough to try it a few times though.

    • StillLikeNewlyweds says:

      Tulsa, you may not think of yourself as a writer, but with your comments on my wife’s story (https://marriageheat.com/2020/03/09/spring-cleaning-can-be-fun/ ) about “Sneak Attacks” and the additional examples you commented on for ClimaXX’s recent story (https://marriageheat.com/2020/03/24/public-blowjob-locations-that-will-blow-more-than-his-mind/ ), I think you should at least submit a list of some of these “Sneak Attacks.” With all of us stuck at home so much, it could provide great inspiration. You could number the list if that helps. 😀

    • Tulsa says:

      Well still, I will think about it.
      I tend to be more on the short-and-sweet style when it comes to writing. That’s anything. Not good at all the fancy-dancy adjectives and all.
      I’m just more suited to short comments. 🙂

    • MarriageHeat says:

      Just a reminder that we have a cracker-jack team of volunteer editors, so don't be afraid to send in your stories. It's the encouragement and support of hot marriages that matters most!

  5. tman27 says:

    I've always wanted to do a naked day with my wife. You know, her parents have the kids for the day and we just hang out naked all day at home. I think it would lead to some hot romps in some rooms we've never done it in before. Thanks for the inspiration!

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