Praying for Sex
As a way to work on our communication skills, my wife and I will randomly discuss topics each of us brings to the table. Recently, I came up with a question that stumped us both, so I figured I would bring it to MH for the readers’ opinions.
My question is this: Would it be wrong to pray for specific sex acts? I know the Bible says pray about everything, but is that type of prayer asking God too much??
I look forward to reading your opinions in the comments.
Hubbie here: thanks for your interesting question; it sparked the following thoughts …
* yes, it would be ok to pray “for specific sex acts”. God created sex and our parts; we can pray for everything related to sex. Do you need more comfort in pursuing more variety? A stronger desire for oral? Success and ease in trying anal? None of this would surprise or discomfit God if heard from a loving, monogamous couple. I think he likes when H&W join together in prayer to heat up their marriage bed.
* when the Bible says to pray about everything, that’s a simple open gate to communication with our loving and gracious Heavenly Father. I personally don’t think it means “everything everything”. We are created rational, reasoning, human beings with the ability and freedom to choose. So don’t pray about whether to have fish or chicken for dinner, which route to take to work each day, or what socks to wear. Just choose it!
* similarly and specifically to your question about sex acts, I don’t think we pray about getting a “taste for cum”, I think I eat a ton of pineapple! I don’t think we pray about getting used to anal and “taking the pain better”, I think we use a ton of lube and go slowly. Both of these apply to either spouse, by the way.
* I also don’t think we pray about “my prude wife swallowing cum” or “my disgusting husband keeping his dick in his pants”. Unilateral prayer for force-changing your partner is kind of not a good thing. Spouses can pray about removing barriers and better aligned frequency. But they can also agree together to make the changes they feel would mutually benefit their marriage, and pray for God’s blessing on their choices.
* all the general provisos and caveats about prayer still apply. I don’t think God is going to grant a prayer for a same gender mate, success in an open marriage, nor suddenly a massive cock or DD breasts. I do think He will honor prayers that honor His creation and plan, and bring his married children sexual pleasure.
A lot more could be said, but these are some early thoughts. Thanks for your post.
Thanks for your reply. You made some really good points
I feel certain that God is fine with our prayers about our marriages- including prayers about our sexual relationship.
I silently pray for specific sex acts. I always include in those prayers a plea that whatever my wife & I do in our lovemaking sessions will be fulfilling to both of us.
Sometimes my prayer for a specific sex act will be answered with a nice yes and other times a gentle no. But the prayer for us to both be satisfied and happy with the sex session is always answered with a yes.
I like the part where you mentioned both to be satisfied in the prayer. Thanks for replying
Maybe I’m old school & never have I prayed for sex or a specific act. To bless our marriage or maybe to conceive a child. I rather leave the lines of communication open to discuss sexual preferences & believe God will satisfy us as he sees fit. God Bless all members of MH ❤️
I believe that God invites us to name our desires, like children do with parents. It doesn't mean we get what we ask for, but it does mean that we are bringing our honest, intimate selves to the Lord. Perhaps the answer will be yes, and perhaps it will be no–but ultimately prayer changes us to be more conformed to the image of his Son. From that place of honesty and vulnerability, our communication with our spouses will only grow richer.
I pray for my own sexual experiences and also for close widow friends for their freedom to masturbate and enjoy themselves.