Intimacy in Heaven?
There’s very little scripture to go on, but the question recently came up in our men’s study group. Opinions varied widely, and even became nearly heated, but how does the MH community feel about the question? Will there be intimacy in heaven? More specifically, will there be sexual intimacy in heaven between each husband and his wife?
My personal belief is that our loving relationship with our spouse is so important that of course it continues in Heaven. And that includes our sexual relationship.
More in the past, many Christians thought that sex – even marital sex – was somehow unworthy or a necessary evil. But most Christians now seem to believe that marriage and our sexual relationship with our spouse is ordained of God. So if it is God- gifted, why would he take that wonderful experience away from worthy married couples?
My relationship with my wonderful wife is to me strong evidence of the love of God. My Melody is so loving, kind, and yes passionate. And I know that God brought us together. He gave us to each other for companionship, comfort, & love. Our sexual relationship is part of that love and how we show our deep love for each other.
After every lovemaking session I feel grateful to my wife. I also feel very grateful to my God for giving Melody & I to each other. So again I ask, why would He take that away in the eternal world?
I believe that we take no material possessions into the Spirit World. But we DO take two non-material things into the Spirit World. They are our relationship with Heavenly Father & His Son Jesus Christ, and our relationships with others… especially our spousal relationship and our family relationships.
Is there marital sexual intimacy in Heaven? I think that is certain. Although sexual intimacy in Heaven is not discussed in my church it is rather implied. Full disclosure I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints so I was raised with a belief in eternal marriage.
We believe in the resurrection. After death we go to the temporary Heaven of Paradise in the Spirit World. (Although the wicked go to Spirit Prison AKA hell where they have to suffer ‘n pay the price for their sins they did not repent of.) I seriously doubt that the wicked souls get to have sexual intimacy.
The worthy souls in Paradise have repented and the Atonement of Jesus Christ cleansed them from their sins – since we all sin. Because they repented they don’t need to go to Spirit Prison or hell.
I doubt that worthy married couples can have sexual intimacy as spirits. But I could be wrong. After the resurrection- when we get perfect immortal bodies I’m sure that worthy marriages include a wonderful sexual relationship!
For good people who never had the joy of a happy marriage in mortality – we believe that they will have all the blessings of the faithful. That implies that they will meet someone in Paradise and get to be married before their resurrection. So presumably as resurrected beings they will also enjoy a joyful sexual relationship with their spouse. No blessings will be withheld from the faithful.
That is my opinion and I know many of my fellow Christian Marriage Heat family will disagree with it; but please know that I am not trying to cause contention – I’m just giving MY answer to KingdomMan’s question.
We are all free to believe in the Gospel of Jesus Christ as we do. My belief is that the Gospel encompasses eternal marriage which clearly implies eternal sexual intimacy for each worthy married couple.
That’s an interesting take. While I don’t believe there will be marriage in heaven, the jury is still out on intimacy.
Patheos.com has a pretty interesting article about whether or not there is marriage in heaven, and it includes quite a lot of context: the Saducees (who didn't believe in the Resurrection) asking specifically about Levirate marriage. It seems almost certain to me that Jesus is speaking specifically about Levirate marriage in Matt. 22/Luke 20.
Personally I can't imagine Heaven without sex or marriage, I can't get behind the idea of us being sanctified by having all our desires taken away, but by having them finally fulfilled, by God. Deuteronomy 8 is something that I go back to a lot when thinking about longings that God has given me. God makes a lot of promises in the Bible and the older I get the more I wrestle with accepting that not all of them are fulfilled while I live (Hebrews 11). Part of the Christian walk is learning to act in this life according to the promises of God, and believe me, my faith has been tested plenty, and moreso in the last few years!
I don't know if couples that married on Earth are married in Heaven: maybe we all get a fresh start, but either way I believe that all Believers will be able to marry and that their marriages will not have any shortcomings that have come from sin and our responses to it. I believe that marriage in Heaven will be a perfect reflection of God, and while I want as much of that as I can have in this life, I believe that whatever my future, someday God will delight in fulfilling all of our longings.
The Bible tells us there will be no marriage in heaven, it doesn’t really say there will be no intimacy. But we’re all still learning, so that’s what this discussion is about 😉
I think sexual intimacy requires a body including sex parts. Those are gone when you are dead. So if there is something like sex in heaven it must be very different, hopefully even better than on earth. And most likely everyone shares it.
I've wondered the same thing! As far as I'm aware, there seems to be no Scripture for or against it. Jesus states clearly that in heaven there is no marriage, since it's only meant to be an earthly picture of the marriage between the Lamb and His church. So I would imagine that in heaven the intimacy we have with Christ is beyond any human experience, and also that the person we were one flesh with in life will still be part of us in eternity. Just my thoughts on the matter! Whatever way it works out, we do know it will be so wonderful that we will never miss earthly intimacy or sex.
I agree with you. Whatever Heaven is, it will be perfect. I can’t help but wonder though, will He remove our sex drive in our glorified bodies, or is there a way for us to experience intimacy? 🤷♂️
"men’s study group. Opinions varied widely, and even became nearly heated" Thumbs up to talking with a group of guys. Something I firmly believe men should do, but I have not really done. Not for lack of trying. but for lack of interest. The fact that it was nearly heated, I would say saddens me. Christians are way too comfortable in their own conclusions. And, we never see how our silence contributes to the overall problem. At least, you have a willing group. Good place to start. Keep it up.
"Will there be intimacy in heaven? More specifically, will there be sexual intimacy in heaven between each husband and his wife?" I have contemplated this question, off & on, for a while. We all have heard the sentiment that love is eternal, love is forever, or our marriage will continue for all eternity. So, looking through scripture I find basically nothing on the age to come, & this. Except, I've read that,…
Matthew 22:30 (ESV)
For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven.
… means there is no sex in Heaven. How people come to this conclusion, I don't know, because it simply does not say that. They sight that angels don't have sex, therefore no sex in Heaven. Plus, I have heard it said some believe angels have no sex organs. Another head scratcher, cause I simply do not know. Not sure of any scripture on that, either.
Where I land, right now, is that we will see when we get there. But, my mind wanders. If Jesus says there is no marriage, nor giving in marriage. This could mean, no sex. I mean, sex could just be an earth-thing. Yet, I would like to entertain the very plausible notion that we will experience sex (created & given by God) in a perfect sinless existence. This seems logical. But, then Jesus still says there will be no marriage, nor giving in marriage. So, if there is sex in Heaven it will be sinless. My thought is sex could exist without marriage, in a sinless Heaven. Meaning, we would not be sinners that need a lot of rules to be kept in line. There won't be any jails or prisons, in Heaven. Therefore, we would behave ourselves & do the Godly right to one another. Sex could not be defiled by sin. Either, if sex without marriage happens, we will be able to have sex with anyone & as many, or we will have exclusive sex, with only 1 opposite sex person, without any burden of sin even being possible. We would behave ourselves, truly free, without fear of labels, or sin happening. We would be married without calling it marriage, if that makes sense.
I personally do not believe our earthly, pre judgement day, marriages will continue in Heaven. But, I could be wrong, & they will be the best "marriages" God could ever produce. That would be a logical reward for the enduring, in marriage, on earth. I tend to think our existence will be so much higher an existence that even the common relationship will blow our current marriage away. Plus, our current marriages are tainted by sin. This is just my speculation, it's not scripture. It could go either way.
Then, there is the fact that scripture talks about all being a son of God, quite a bit. In different places & contexts.
Luke 20:35-36 (ESV) "35 but those who are considered worthy to attain to that age and to the resurrection from the dead neither marry nor are given in marriage, 36 for they cannot die anymore, because they are equal to angels and are sons of God, being sons of the resurrection."
I cannot say there will be no daughters, women, in Heaven. We will find out if we all will, literally, be sons of the resurrection. Meaning, when women go to Heaven they will be sons, men. This doesn't seem logical, but I have heard this stressed in Christiandom. However, this could be a reason for no sex, or marriage, in Heaven. And, it might be logical seeing how we have a Father, a Spirit, & a Son; but no Mother God in Heaven. This all sounds far fetched to our sin-filled minds, but God can do anything He wants, & it will be righteous & without sin. Can't wait to find out.
Great question! Love it! Thanks for asking.
I agree that we Christians are “way too comfortable in our own conclusions.”
As for me: marriage in heaven – no. Sex in heaven – I don’t know.🤷♂️
So, from my reading and understanding of scripture (which may not be accurate and I could totally be wrong but I’ve talked to multiple pastors and had the notion confirmed) Heaven isn’t the end.
The scriptures tell us that yes, heaven is where we go when we die and it is where the judgement will occur however Heaven is a place for spirits. When Jesus returns believers’ spirits will be reunited with their bodies, and their bodies will be perfected. We were always meant to be flesh and spirit. We are not fully “human” without both.
After this, scripture further indicates that there will be a New Heaven and a New Earth where we will be placed.
To my understanding THAT is where we will be living and…surprisingly…working. There is no marriage or being given in marriage when we are in heaven because we are spirit but I imagine on the new earth in perfected form we will be doing that and having kids potentially because the Edenic principle was to be fruitful multiply and subdue the earth….spreading Eden throughout.
It’s my belief that married believers stay married…and continue to have great sex because that’s how God made us to begin with.
😉
Your view is very similar to mine! Based on what my pastor has opened up about the new kingdom and our roles in it, I have a very different view of Heaven from the one I used to have. There will be work, jurisdictions, and going in and out of the New Jerusalem (where Jesus reigns) to witness to those still outside during the thousand years. It's so interesting! As to marriage and sex, my belief is just that it will be wonderful however God has arranged it. Everything will be fulfilled and sin will be gone. Yay and hallelujah!
I can pretty much follow along with you except for the part of marriages continuing. As for having kids on the new earth…I’ve honestly never considered that. Hmmm…interesting thought
I am not a Bible scholar by any means …some said Jesus said their would be no marriage in Heaven…so I would guess our early desires would be superseded by supernatural desires to be close to God …
The other concept of sexless relationships in Heaven stems from my thoughts on what happens when a remarried spouse is in heaven and meets the former spouse? Sexless / no marriage relationships in heaven clean that up pretty well…
just a couple thoughts…
Corinthians 2:9 Eye hath not seen ear hath not heard nor has entered the heart of man what awaits us in heaven.I think that means Heaven will be better than anything our feeble minds can imagine and that would have to include sex.Having said that like everybody else I don't know,I just think sometimes we like to put God in a box that fits our perception of Him.I also have questions about those who have been married more than once.That could get a little complicated no?
The reason we have sex on earth is so we procreate. No need to have babies in heaven so no reason to have sex. There will be no jealousy so those of us that were married more than once can enjoy being with all of them. There were be no male and female.
I agree that Heaven will be better than anything we can think or imagine. Personally, I can’t wait!
Last night the wife and I engaged in a very heavenly fuck after she sauntered across the bedroom totally naked after her shower. She knew what she was doing so I gave it to her proper. In enjoy this earthly pleasure along with great food, beautiful scenery, and lovely sound. My views of the afterlife lead me to believe there is no need for sex in heaven. We will not miss it.
That’s an interesting take. Who knows, you might be right? 🤷♂️
If we want to include the Book of Enoch when angels were sent to earth and had sex with human women. That makes a case for sex being possible after death. And likely why that book was removed from the Bible about 4th century.
I think the Bible alludes to angels having sex with human women and producing giants, but I don’t know that they were the good angels.
Jesus when asked about marriage in Heaven responds, "At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven" (Matthew 22:30)
Heaven is not a physical place like the Earth where we would have our bodies. Sex requires a physical AND spiritual union, not one or the other, so I would imagine since Jesus states people do not marry nor are given in marriage, we will be fulfilled through God in a different way we cannot possibly imagine but we know is better than anything on this earth (and if me and my future wife are in Heaven, we would get to share this together as well!)
I don't think much on it, as I trust that "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined the things that God has prepared for those who love him." (1 Corinthians 2:9)
We will have our bodies, although glorified and made perfect at the resurrection. And your allusion to 1 Corinthians is spot on 😉
Between death and the resurrection, we will have on physical body, therefore no sex.
At the resurrection, those who in Christ will receive a glorified body.
Jesus is our groom, we His people are the bride at the wedding feast of the lamb.
I don't see how sex comes into this, there must be some mystical way.
Ecstasy experienced by some of the saints has been connected to orgasm (something from Teresa of Ávila comes to mind.)
I have long believed we should be having orgasms as a foretaste of the ecstasy we will have we facing God. We can't all be having sex with our spouse all the time, which is why I believe as Christians it is important that we push self-masturbation and a reason why I wrote: https://marriageheat.com/2024/06/02/masturbation-as-sexual-purity/
I don’t know, but it is something to think about. Thanks for your response!
It is pretty clear that there is no marriage in heaven and no sexual intimacy. Jesus himself alluded to this in Matthew 22. We will have spiritual bodies instead of earthly bodies. The spiritual world is different from the earthly world.
Matthew 22:
23 On that day there came to him Sadducees, they that say that there is no resurrection: and they asked him,
24 saying, Teacher, Moses said, If a man die, having no children, his brother shall marry his wife, and raise up seed unto his brother.
25 Now there were with us seven brethren: and the first married and deceased, and having no seed left his wife unto his brother;
26 in like manner the second also, and the third, unto the seventh.
27 And after them all, the woman died.
28 In the resurrection therefore whose wife shall she be of the seven? for they all had her.
29 But Jesus answered and said unto them, Ye do err, not knowing the scriptures, nor the power of God.
30 For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as angels in heaven.
31 But as touching the resurrection of the dead, have ye not read that which was spoken unto you by God, saying,
32 I am the God of Abraham, and the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob? God is not [the God] of the dead, but of the living.
33 And when the multitudes heard it, they were astonished at his teaching.
My take on angels having sex with women. Quote is from a site I frequent.
"Once in a while, you will find an author claiming that "sons of God" refers to angels and that they intermarried with men to produce a super race. Such speculation cannot be true. Jesus said that angels do not marry (Matthew 22:30), implying that they are not male and female as men are. It is true that angels are called "sons of God" in Job 1:6, but righteous people are also called "sons of God" in Hosea 1:10. Even in the New Testament, we find, "For you are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus" (Galatians 3:26). Understanding Genesis 6 to refer to righteous men gives a simpler meaning to the verses than to reach for a fanciful meaning of angels marrying women.
Notice the mention of "giants" and "mighty men." This can be read one of two ways: they were physically large or they were giants among men in the sense of leaders. But notice that the giants existed before and after the sons of God married the daughters of men. The giants were not a product of the sons of God marrying the daughters of men."
I can see angels being neither men or women but still being able to enjoy sex with men and women that are still of earth. Being genderless in heaven makes sense as there will jot be conception. But we might enjoy a type of sexual pleasure regardless of which gender we were on earth. It’s a complicated issue. And gender and sex issues were a problem for early writers of scripture. Like the trouble describing the relationship between Jesus and Mary Magdalene. And deciding Priests had to be celibate.
I'm loving this discussion! I like C.S. Lewis' take on it. Basically he says that one could have sex in heaven, but the intimacy we feel every minute with everyone in heaven and the ecstatic pleaxure we feel from the presence of God will make sex seems to be rather "milktoast". Heaven will be like a nonstop (nonsexal) bonding and orgasm with every other person there.
God says in Hebrews that "Everything is open and bare (the Greek word is "gymnos", "naked") before him" (my paraphrase). Of couse that means we are nude to him. But much more, he can see every intent of our heart. A good reminder to repent of sins, but also to rejoice in how intimantly he knows us. I have no proof, but a suspicion, that that is how everyone in heaven will see us. Does that mean we'll be naked? Revelations says clearly that the robes represent righteousness. So it is a theologically open question. But that would be a minor thing compared to everyone knowing my every deep thought…and loving me at the same time. Talk about intimacy, not romantic intimacy, far beyond that, agape intimacy! The command to love others as God loves us will be fulfilled. Whether with or without clothes, our souls will be naked to each other. Lovemaking between spouses who love each other more than life. The physical, mental, emotional sharing of sex is the most amazing thing Ive known on earth. Its is not for no reason that God repeatedly compares heaven to that. The great wedding feast of the lamb, the virgins waiting for the bridegroom, the bride of Christ… the best, most intimate, most committed sex, is an image of what is waiting for. Just a shadow. But oh when we experience the fullness! Talk about an orgasm!
That makes some sense to me. Likely no physical sex, no genders. Pleasure in a sexual type of union with everyone. Which is something like many Christian’s are fighting not to occur on earth. The pleasure from bonding with all others will in essence replace sex but fulfill us in a similar way. Not likely you will have a home with a picket fence where all the people you married or were sexual with live happily together.
I personally believe that there will not be sexual intimacy in heaven. However, I do believe that there will be intimacy, in the sense of very close, loving, personal relationships, both with other believers in heaven, and also with God himself. I also believe that this kind of intimacy will be better than even the best earthly sex, because things in earthly creation are usually meant to point to an even greater and more intense spiritual reality.
Now what do I base that belief on? First, Jesus' response to the Sadducees about the hypothetical situation where a wife was married 7 consecutive times to 7 brothers. Jesus says "For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage…" (Matthew 22:30, ESV). This implies not only that no NEW marriages will occur, but from the context of the hypothetical, it also implies that prior earthly marriages will not continue in heaven. This agrees with other biblical context, teaching that marriage ends at death (Romans 7:1-3).
Now, I do believe that those who were married on earth will continue to have a special bond in heaven because of the special intimacy and life experiences they shared together while on earth. I'm convinced that Jesus' explanation means there will be some significant changes in how married people relate to one another in heaven, and I think the scriptural evidence leans very much toward making a case that marriage and sex will not continue in heaven.
I also have a response to the idea that "I don't think God would take away a good thing." I do understand that sentiment, but I think it's short-sighted.
I would compare the transition from earthly life to heavenly life to the transition from Old Covenant to New Covenant. As Jesus said about himself in Matthew 5:17, the change is not about abolishing, it's about fulfilling. The Old Testament law was not abolished by the New Covenant, it was fulfilled. In other words, it was not destroyed becuase it was something bad, but instead, it was fundamentally transformed by something newer and greater, and made into what it was always meant to be. The Old Testament law was not bad, but it was incomplete and unfulfilled. Every aspect of life is like that now, but will be deeply transformed when Christ returns and takes us to live with him in paradise. Marriage and sex are very good things, but like the Old Testament law, they have a purpose that will eventually come to an end, because their true fulfillment will arrive. They will give way to a greater reality, the fullness of beauty that they were always meant to point to, namely, the consummation of our relationship with Christ in the fullness of his presence, as opposed to the "betrothal" period his Bride (the Church, his people) is in now. (2 Corinthians 11:2, Revelation 19:6-9)
[From MH: Many readers will be aware of our policy that we generally do not allow direct links to outside sources, due to the high volume of sexual content on the internet that conflicts with Christian values. However, we found these articles relevant to the conversation, and have allowed them in this instance.]
This is a great question and let me share what Perplexity, highly respected GEN AI driven LLM shared. Before I answer I should mention I have a background in business consulting with very large, mid size, and mid market companies. I have also provided advisory services to our federal government as well as international governments in the areas of foreign policy and human rights. So I consider myself a very progressive thought leader. I also had hundreds of posts and commentaries on LinkedIn, the Wall Street Journal, and once on Online Harvard Business Review. So I consider myself a very progressive thought leader.
For more research on this topic please review https://www.patheos.com/blogs/fleshofmyflesh/2025/07/yes-there-is-sex-in-the-resurrection/
Given this question I decided to ask Perplexity.
Here is the question and here is Perplexity's answer
QUESTION Have there been reports about people who went to heaven and then came back to earth however while in heaven they experienced sex?
Yes, there are some personal accounts and speculative writings that talk about sexual‑like experiences, merging, or even explicit “sex in heaven.”
But these are individual testimonies and interpretations, not agreed‑upon doctrine or empirically verifiable reports.
One thing I have found in the evengelical church people. There are traditonal Christians and then like most of us there are progresssive Christians. I know traditional Christians would rather not answer this question and say No, there is no sex in heaven. Yet I also think you need to take this account rather seriously. Given that they were in heaven for just a short time there is according to their witness and experience that sex does exist in heaven. Now reading one must think that most pastors might not want to comment on this answer.
However here is one view we need to consider whAT Peter Kreef says. Please review https://www.peterkreeft.com/topics/sex-in-heaven.htm I will take oe step forward in saying yes there will be sex in heaven. Are are told that there will be great banquets in heaven. If God given us the gift enjoy food like we do on earth would you also think God will allow us to enjoy sex in heaven.
Lets face it as Christian men and women we need food to live. We need food to live, therefore we need sex to sustain our spirit to live. Therefore after all, of us have enjoyed really really enjoyed, with great pleasure, wonderful sex as well as loving erotic sex. It was a gift from God. So just as God has allow us to have bodies and enjoy food in heaven I say God has also allow us to have is sex in heaven so we can continue living well and in God's harmony,
Thank you for your response – and the effort you put into it.
I tend to think that there will be sex in heaven, although I don’t know how that will work exactly. I don’t mean the mechanics of it, I mean with whom.
It’s clear there is no marriage in heaven, but the question of sex remains.
I do have thoughts, but I’m not sure it’s expedient to place them here.
All things considered, it’s really of no consequence either way – Heaven will be perfect and we’ll be perfect in it.
There is also another reason to believe that there will be sex in heaven. Jesus said we will have glorified bodies. In effect we will be perfect and very real, physical, and embodied with human life.