Sex Parables

It Happened To Both Of Us

This is one of my more “serious” posts. It was difficult to write, but I felt compelled to do so since I saw other stories like this. My husband and I were both molested when we were children. It had happened before we met.

I was 10 when it happened to me. My friend was having her 6th birthday, and her family seemed respectable, so my parents allowed me to stay there for the night. The girl and I shared a bed due to space shortage, and it was then that the bad thing happened. Both her parents hurt us, but while I was only touched inappropriately, and it only happened to me that one time, I realized that this girl had been through worse.

In a way, I was glad to have been there with her, so that she wasn’t alone, but it was horrible. Afterward, the parents had a violent argument before they went to bed, but the next morning, they served us breakfast, and nothing much was said. I know I’m rather explicit, but it goes to show that molesters can be women too, and I was one of their victims.

When I left the home with my parents, I told them what happened, and they straight away took me to the police station. They were very upset, naturally and the girl’s parents were arrested. At court, they apologized to us both individually for their crimes, but even though I was 10, I knew they were only “sorry” because they got caught. Nevertheless, it did give me closure. They went to jail for a long time and could not contact us at all, or they’d be back in once they got out. The girl went to live with relatives and we both, sometimes together attended therapy. By God’s grace, I was doing great after a while, and, also by God’s grace, I was able to forgive these people, and I never hated them.

Six years later I met my husband, and I knew I’d have to tell him sooner or later, so I waited for the right time. But then, he said, “I’ve got something to tell you…”

So I listened, and he said that he was molested too! I was so taken aback I had to tell him my story then and there as well! My husband was molested by a member of his extended family when he was 12. The man who did it to him was also brought to justice, thankfully, and my husband’s parents were supportive of him too. My husband went through therapy as well, and by the time we met we didn’t even have to think about it anymore. But the fact that my husband told me first shows his strength. I’m still proud of him; he was such a brave man to tell me, and it somehow made me love him even more. My husband doesn’t hate the man who molested him. He, too, forgives him, and it’s ultimately God who will deal with us. I still remember us talking about this the first time, we were teens. We told each other everything, so we’d never speak of it again. We were both in tears, not because of ourselves, but each other. When we were done talking about this, we gave each other a big, long hug.

As you know, our wedding night was so beautiful, and the only “pain” was that brief virginal pain, being my first time, but that only lasted for a split second. From our wedding night, we were able to enjoy sex to the fullest. So if any of you has been hurt like this, don’t be afraid to speak up. Pray to God always, He will always look after you. Remember that what someone chose to do to you is NOT your fault. And don’t let them take away the joy in your life – and forgiveness, in addition to God telling us to forgive – also is setting yourselves free. You can still have a great, happy life, and that includes your sex life – we did! And we are NOT slowing down! May God bless you all, darlings!

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15 replies
  1. CMLove says:

    Wow!! Thank you so much for sharing, Harper! What a blessing that your sex life is so hot and healthy despite the past and that it is so safe from “intruders” in the mind. Praise the Lord! Both my husband and I were molested when we were little (he by his cousin and I by a family friend). Tragically, my husband’s molestation skewed his views so much that he became the perpetrator toward a few others before Jesus saved him out of that. Ours is such a story of God’s grace and forgiveness…..I had a very hard time forgiving my molester and, through the beautiful way God works, the only way I could forgive my husband (as he wept with sorrrow) was by forgiving the young man who had wronged me. Its a long story (one that may or may not need to be shared) but just know that you and your husband are dear to me and we are all so blessed to be counted as God’s masterpieces! Love you, sister!

    • Harper Shelby Thornton says:

      Love you too, sweet! I’m so sorry that your story isn’t as happy but I’m just so happy that Jesus delivered you guys out of that. Aww you are precious I’m flattered that you care so much! Thank you so much! God bless you, sis!

  2. Blondie says:

    Thank you so much for sharing! I was also molested around the age of 10. God bless you for sharing this difficult story! I hope that this story will help others as they overcome what happened to them. It happens to more people than we realize. I know I speak for the rest of MH in saying we are so thankful to have you and your amazing testimonies of love with your husband here, Harper!

    • Harper Shelby Thornton says:

      It certainly does! And it’s not always stereotypical either, is it – women sometimes do it too and it also happens to men, which is also why I wanted to share this (my husband permitted it of course) in hopes of giving encouragement to men. You’re very welcome and I’m so sorry it happened to you too! And I’m so glad that you guys enjoy reading my stories! I love you very much, and may God bless you too!

  3. hornyGG says:

    God bless you and your husband Harper my friend and thank you both so much for sharing this. I am sure this story will be a blessing to all who have gone through such a terrible experience. Love ya and Stay horny as always.

  4. Moviefan2k4 says:

    Thanks for this; being abused at the age of five likely contributed to my later sins after hitting puberty. Someday, I'll be telling my wife about it…and I really want her to be a Godly woman who won't mock or make fun of it.

    • Harper Shelby Thornton says:

      I'm very sorry this has happened to you – if your wife really loves you, she will not make fun of it and I think the sooner you tell her the better. I wish you all the best and may God keep you.

  5. Lovinghusband says:

    Harper, I just got home from church a while ago and decided to check MH. I had never read this before – I don't know how I missed it! What an experience for you both. Thank you for writing it. The power of God's mercy in both of you is very evident. I'm so happy for where He has brought you both in life – and for where you are now. Your parents must have been horrified. Then, to have this bonding moment with your future husband – with a common experience of sorts. God bless you my friend!!! LH

    • Harper Shelby Thornton says:

      God bless you too, LH and thank you so much! Yes, I remember my parents being really upset. My dad wanted to beat those people to a pulp – he didn't, but the fact that he wanted to certainly showed. My husband told me his parents felt the same way, especially since for him it was a family member. It's such a blessing that God gave us the strength to move on and have a great sex life from our wedding night. I'm even thinking of writing that story about that night I mentioned when we made love after attended that conference.

    • Lovinghusband says:

      I won't miss the story if you write it. I'm do for a new story soon – I'll let you know when I post it. It will be a hot hot memory! ? LH

    • Harper Shelby Thornton says:

      I think will actually 🙂 I'll be reading your story I tell you! A hot memory, eh? I tell you our Christmas in Greenland brought along some hot memories back!

  6. Clara Olivia Thornton says:

    You precious darlings! Harper, love I remember when you first told me about this. As terrible I feel for you both, I also see you both as an inspiration that you still have great sex! God bless you, loves

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