How Has Marriage Heat Changed Your Sex Life?
Dear Marriage Heat family,
When you first came to Marriage Heat – you already had a sex life – whether single or married. You had habits or patterns. You had a vocabulary. Your had ideas. You had boundaries. You had your go-to moves. You had ideas about freedom and limits. You had a range of fantasies.
I want to ask one basic question – that would be fun to have both old-timers and newer-comers answer.
The basic question is: How has Marriage Heat changed your sex life?
In answering this basic question – you will probably touch on these along the way:
- What has changed in your thinking about sex?
- Is what the Bible teaches more prominent in your sexual thinking? Or less? Or the same?
- What has changed in your practice? What has been affirmed?
- What are some new things in your sex life that were not there before coming to Marriage Heat?
- What change has surprised you most?
- Do you masturbate more? Less? About the same?
- Are you more satisfied? Less satisfied? About the same?
- Do you have sex more? Less? About the same?
- Wives: What have you learned from other husbands – that has helped improve your sex with your husband?
- Wives: What have you learned from other wives – that has helped improve your sex with your husband?
- Husbands: What have you learned from other wives – that has helped improve your sex with your wife?
- Husbands: What have you learned from other husbands – that has helped improve your sex with your Wife?
- Anyone totally unchanged by the impact of Marriage Heat?
After you reply, I encourage you to keep coming back and seeing how other’s are responding. This will not only be fun – but instructive for us all.
In the spirit of Thanksgiving – may our replies show forth a gratefulness to God for growing us and changing us in all areas of our lives – including our sex life!
God bless you all! LH
Thanks LH. How has MH changed our sex life? We’re having more sex… with the expectation of sex every night unless we’re too tired or unwell. It’s now more an ‘opt out’ thing than ‘opt in,’ which means more sex all up. She’s experiencing stronger orgasms (I didn’t expect this) via my circular movement around her lady place rather than back and forth – this came through her experimenting with masturbation (with me there – she’s never masturbated alone). Also, she’s dressing up more when we go out (super beautiful). We’ve tried a few new things like me pulling her hair a little during sex, being a little rougher, some dirty talk. She’s playing with my ‘love wand’ more… still early days! She is much more aware of how men/I think and wanting to please me. I’m learning to lead her more strongly into sex realising she is more the submissive type (Thanks Silver et al). I’m learning to see her (and women more generally) as more sexual than I once thought. All the women writing in here and sharing their experiences is helping me see women differently. I’ve learnt from some of the husbands how to ‘take her’ and that ‘no’ can easily turn into ‘yes.’
Particularly significant posts for her have been – your post LovingHusband, ‘Christian sex – no one else knows,’ and Strawberry’s post, ‘Marriage Heat Wife,’ and Marriage Joy’s post, ‘Sexy Attitude.’ These rocked her world and have taken her ages to process ‘cos they have so challenged her assumptions. I’ve appreciated Blondie, HornyGG, and Silver, and everyone really!
Biblically, Eva’s stuff on the primacy of love has been excellent – really listening and then responding sacrificially to our partners. It would be cool if someone did a post on the spiritual dimensions of sex – for example, prayer before, during and after sex, sex as an act of worship (‘offer your bodies as a living sacrifice’) and sex as a spiritual discipline, (or did I miss a post on this?).
I am so glad to hear that you and your wife are “getting along” so well, Stag! 😉 I remember some months ago when you wrote asking for prayer. Praise the Lord! Thank you for sharing all that He is doing in your lives! It is a confirmation of God’s power and His faithfulness! Excited to hear more great things!
Stag….those are such great ideas for posts…I am especially interested in the sex as spiritual discipline one. I’d like to see you unpack that one, it sounds like a really interesting concept. Years ago Walls and I used to pray frequently before we were intimate. It’s a habit we’ve gotten out of over the years, but it’s a great one! I have also thought about the sex as an act of worship one and actually submitted a post on that topic recently…so if The MH admins haven’t finally decided I’ve gone off the deep end, maybe that will be posting sometime soon. 🙂
Well, let’s just say that Marriage Heat has helped to add at least another thing to my husband’s list of how I turn him on. I remember mentioning that my husband finds it sexy that I write our love stories on here. We share a computer in our room which I use for this, and whenever he sees me writing on here, he always kisses my neck, or embraces me from behind.
I let him read our stories, and we oftentimes make love after. I love remembering our younger days as I write my older stories as does my husband. We love to share our stories on here and to read other stories too, and it’s wonderful that questions can be asked, and hard topics can be discussed for help here.
I love the encouragement given here, that despite some hardships we might’ve faced God still takes care of us, and we’re still able to enjoy sex! And I love to see couples of all ages having fun! God bless you all <3
What a great post, especially around Thanksgiving for I do give God special thanks for this website! Thanks for encouragement to remember, LH! Wow, “How has Marriage Heat NOT changed your sex life?” might be the easier question for me to answer! This website has so completely changed my sex life, I know that the only way to describe it would be that God’s mighty hand was at work. It has really helped restore a right view of sex and my own sexuality; I had NEVER masturbated before looking at this website (despite my husband’s sweet pleas to do so.) I just felt dirty whenever I put my fingers “down there.” But Marriage Heat and especially the posts about masturbation have really helped me see the beauty and gift from God that it is!
I have gleaned so much wisdom and encouragement from the MH family that I can no longer imagine my life without all of you amazing brothers and sisters in Christ! And i also want to send out a huge “THANK YOU!” to the MH administrators who make this site and the healthy, godly relationships between members possible. Thank you again and again for all you do!
This site has really opened up my communication with my husband also. We are trying new things that I never would have even talked about earlier in our marriage. I guess, in summary, (because this comment is already pretty long LOL) God has used Marriage Heat in my life to open up my heart and my body in a way that, I believe, He intended it to be.
First of all – thank you MH administrators – your labor of love has made the love making of many – less laborious. Your love, your time, your investment in every way – is such a gracious gift to so many. Thank you for your commitment to the Scriptures. Thank you for the balance you show – the difficult balance – in protecting people from false teaching on the one hand. And on the other hand allowing good provocative discussion on controversial subjects. You know when to protect us like children and allow us to grow into adulthood. All by leaning on God’s wisdom – and prayer.
Second – anyone who has read things I’ve written – I could literally write all day on the questions I posed. I am going to attempt to be brief and not say too much.
I will say this about MH’s effect on my marriage:
None of us ever step into the same river twice – in the sense that the water you stepped into – has now flowed downstream. The same is true about so many things in life. As Christians, we grow in our understanding of the teachings of the Bible. We have a beginning – where were learn the basics (never leaving them). But there is continual growth in understanding. Thus, we have a middle and an end. It is wonderful to grow in the understanding of God’s Word.
The same is true in the sexual realm for my wife and I. We are not where we were on our wedding day, or our 10th anniversary, or our 20th. It seems this is the way God made us to be – growing and developing. Never leaving the basics or fundamentals. But, not staying the same, either.
Sports teams have to change in developing strategies and skills to win. The military strategies of just nations require constant change and development. Fashion, even many daily habits over time get tweaked and changed.
Marriage Heat has reminded us that we are part of a company of Christians – that has come to recognize that growing in our sexual lives brings changes too. The fundamentals in the Bible are the foundation. Yet, couples made in God’s image – live out the creativity of God in the sexual realm, too. It is a fresh wind! It can bring and often does bring crisis points to some couples – as the new territory is a new frontier of sorts, a new way of thinking, talking, positioning, dressing, and more. It is different than what went before. Yet, this community of Christian contributors has helped us all to realize that we are on the same bus! We are not perverts. We are not even weird. We are people made to grow and experience greater fullness. And growing can hurt at first – but then when we fit into the shoes that were once too big – we realize that our growing was a blessing.
To be specific – MH has helped us (and others) really feel comfortable in our skin. To love being kinky; or enjoying oral sex; or talking naughty; or giving and getting sext messages from a spouse – we learn that there are many other people who love God – who are just like us. That is a blessing.
To learn what other wives think, desire, crave, say, and do – has helped me know my wife better. I realize she has a lot more in common with other women – and that encourages us both. To hear things from other husbands – challenges me to be a better husband. I steal their creative ideas and use them on my wife – and give them no credit! 🙂 Just one of the MH perks!
What initially surprised me the most – and pleasantly so – is to hear the testimony of other horny wives. It has honestly given me a greater boldness with my already horny wife – to know even more – that she can be wild inside – just like many others! We masturbate more – not because our view has changed – but we are horny more often. Our sex is more satisfying. Honestly, in recent months – for the first time in a few years, we have had less sex than the pace we had been on for quite a while. Not because of age or desire – as much as life circumstances. In fact, those circumstances have changed back – and we need to adjust to more again.
So, I have given thanks to the MH administration. I also want to give thanks to all of you who write. ALL of you. The smallest comments from someone who almost never writes – has an impact! I thank all of you. Your interest and thinking encourages me. My wife has never written on MH – perhaps she will one day. She is my biggest fan and knows of my involvement here – but is much more shy than me in regards to communication. We are not clones of each other. But, she likes the heat and information that I bring to our sexual relationship – from this site. She has read sex books with me – but is still an amazing irony of sorts – so horny in practice, but shy in communication. There are some exceptions to that rule – but she is pretty quiet. 🙂 I’m the loudmouth!! 🙂 Even still, your stories, advice, and comments have affected her and my children – and friends. For this and more I say thank you MH family.
Lastly, I want to remind us that all the glory for whatever is good goes to God! He is the Lord of Marriage Heat. He is the motivator and sustainer of the administration.He is the Truth behind the writers.
Thank you Father for the wonderful ways you teach us – and all the means You have chosen to use – including your servants at Marriage Heat. We are thankful – not just during the American holiday of Thanksgiving – but throughout the year. We love stepping into the sexual river every time – because You made it to be rich and fresh! LH
Well said, LovingHusband! I agree wholeheartedly! May God bless you, brother, as you continue to follow Him!
I haven’t read all the stories. My wife and I are still newlyweds figuring things out but MH has helped us a lot. Especially since we’re expecting our first child. Sex can feel like a chore or be boring. Reading stories on MH makes both of us in the mood and gives us ideas to make our Sex life hotter. Hopefully soon MH can help bring my wife the big O.
That’s a great reply Katie, and it made me smile!
I think this site has helped me as a single man. I’m a hardworking gentleman who’d never come onto a woman inappropriately. But I think as Christians, it can be really challenging to date. There’s more ways than ever to meet people but how do you meet the right people in your faith? This topic of sexuality is so difficult for the unmarried Christians because you often are expected to not even bring up those things until there’s a commitment at which point, there’s a lot invested and you may find out the other person doesn’t share your “heat” – and while sexuality isn’t everything in a marriage, it’s definitely more of a part than some are willing to talk about.
Here we get to talk about it, study and explore those ideas! Which is exciting. My upbringing wasn’t so much sexually negative as sexually silent. You got the idea that it was “ok” for married people but it wasn’t really talked about nor did I have much education about the things I became curious about which made me feel in some way “bad” for a time. So the information and stories on this site reassure me there’s others like me who take their faith and their sexual health and happiness seriously.
It is a great idea about the MH singles site. I have often felt there should be a Christian dating site with a twist. Where you fill out some questions or study the MH type of thoughts and principles before becoming a part of it, but it doesn’t have to be indecent because those things aren’t necessarily revealed in public on the site, they’re used as part of the matching process. So the profiles and discussions can be completely decent but you’re still matched with people who would be sexually compatible if there was a committed relationship rather than someone who would find your beliefs offensive, or even just wasn’t ready for that stage of thinking or faith. Just a dream of mine!
Kudos to your husband and to your openness to be inspired and be a passionate wife, and to your single friends, I encourage them to stay faithful and stay sexy!
Adam, I look forward to reading more from your perspective soon. LH
We have always been a very conservative couple. Both of us were virgins when we married so sex was so so new to us. I have always looked to enhance our sex life as my wife is a little on the “shy” side. Although always willing to try new things. After finding MH a few months ago, we have used it often in our sex life. The stories on this site get us going like to other! I have always wanted to share some experiences she has had in coming more open to sex but she is very shy. MH has helped her feel more open to being sexual and I am reaping the benefits of it! I for one am grateful to the benefits of her reading MH. I look forward to sharing some stories!re.
As a long time member of MH, I can honestly say that MH has added that extra spice to my and Ben’s marriage. It has also deepened our love for the Lord.
When I first ran across MH over a year ago my mind was blown by how lovingly open and honest the contributors were. There were stories that turned me on, stories that made me laugh and stories that made me cry.
I have always been comfortable with my sexuality and desires. I love sex, whether it be masturbation or sex with Ben. I guess you can say that I am one with my body and that includes my pussy.
After reading several stories I decided to share MH with Ben. We read a few stories together, often making love or masturbating together afterwards. I was excited that I had found MH.
When I asked Ben about sharing our intimacy on MH, he was hesitant as you can imagine. However, after seeing and experiencing my excitement he agreed.
Well, here I am near 40 stories later and I can honestly say I feel that same excitement. MH has not only touched me sexually, but spiritually as well.
I have great admiration for Blondie, Lovinghusband, Silver, Eva, Harper and many others that I am proud to call dear friends even if we have never met. MH is such a blessing and Ben and I can never thank Blondie and the rest of the administrators enough for this site.
God bless you LH for this post and God bless everyone in this dear community, family if you will. You are all so precious to Ben and I. Stay Horny ya’ll!!!
I’ve been trying to figure out how to respond to this…because it isn’t like Walls and I didn’t have great sex before MH. Because we did. And truth be told, a lot of what we did before is still the same as what we do now. But I think for me most of what happened bc of MH was a mental shift. It used to be that I explored sexuality in spite of my faith. Now I would say that I explore sexuality BECAUSE of my faith. I’ve come to understand sexuality as being something so much deeper and so much more spiritual/relational that I ever did before. It’s been such a fun and amazing journey this last year or so. Thanks so much to everyone who contributes and comments. Thanks for your transparency and your faith. You are all such an amazing and important part of my life.
Eva – as one of those contributors – I am thankful for you, too! You are important to me (us)! LH
So happy for you Tammy!! LH
Katie, really encouraging to see the freedom God has brought you and your husband. LH
TW- Haha! Our own corner bar! Love that! I remember horny hubby talking awhile back about someday getting to all meet each over face to face on the other side. And how funny it would be if some of us actually knew each other in real life. I think about that often. There’s a guy at my church who could almost be LH and horny hubby could be any of about a dozen people I went to college with. And Silver never reminded me of anyone I knew, but I always wished for the longest time that i could meet her and we could have a nice long conversation over a cup of coffee together. I met a woman on another site once who was in a sexless marriage for a reason that was because of her but not her fault and we had a conversation about what that was like for her husband….and every time I think of you, I think of her husband. Not that I know enough about your story to even be able to guess why your marriage is what it is. But just because these stories like theirs and these stories like yours just make me so sad. And I am so in awe of the level of friendship and tenacity that hold your marriages together. But…at any rate…glad you are here at the corner bar. You bring good stuff to the conversation. And we enjoy your presence here.
Eva – I wonder the same things!!!! I wonder what if you and Walls were sitting next to us – that type of thing. I don’t know to what degree we have anything approximating great minds – but in many things we think alike!! 🙂
God bless you. LH
Hi thoughtfulwriter – I understand your shyness and carefulness. My wife is still very much the same as you.
I liked your comment about threads serving as a kind of therapy of sorts.
Not feeling alone in so many of these things is a huge encouragement – isn’t it! God bless you. LH
Katie, your story made me laugh so hard. You need to write more on here, girl. You are hilarious. 🙂
Sorry for being late to the party but Marriage Heat has changed our marriage in such a positive way as my wife and I speak about things more openly now as we are not embarrassed to ask for things in bed that maybe considered freaky as we see that Christian couples can be freaks too lol 🙂 but we read these stories together and we comment which sometimes turns into sex because we get so turned on reading some of these stories.
Awesome HH!!