How to Last Longer?

I just read a story by NewWife titled Before the Alarm. It raised some questions for me.

Men, how do you last longer while pleasuring your wife’s pussy with your cock? Ladies, what does your husband do to last longer during penetration? I don’t know what NewWife’s husband does, but it seems that he has managed to control his masculine instincts and hold back his orgasm because of her. And when a woman reaches climax around her man’s cock with her contractions milking him, omg! That’s pretty much like 1,000 hugs from her pussy to his cock! How does a man last even during and after his wife’s orgasm?

By the way, do your husbands masturbate when you are not available? A very well-known pastor says that if a guy masturbates, he won’t be able to satisfy his woman. To be honest, I got a little scared because I love masturbation and I do it on a daily basis. But I am amazed at husbands who, for some reason, know how to satisfy a woman with his member.

I hope my questions don’t bother you all; this is really very important to me.

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15 replies
  1. HeSaid-SheSaid says:

    How to last longer? One word…PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE (and practicing with masturbation helps too)!!!! That is a pretty bold statement by that pastor, and rather incorrect for many a man, except for maybe those with E.D..

  2. PacMan says:

    Just because one has the title of Pastor, it does not make them a sexpert! Some of those thoughts he shared seem misguided. Don’t obsess about lasting longer. My wife prefers quicker sessions. Every relationship is different. You will accept your FW just as she is, and hopefully she will afford that to you. You don’t have to be perfect in bed on Day 1. [And trust me, 9 out of 10 chance masturbation will be a part of your married life in some form or fashion!]

  3. J_ says:

    I agree that practice is important, but I’ve also found that I can be strategic in order to last as long as I need/want to… for example, sometimes all I need to do if I realize I’m getting close is slow down my pace of thrusting or maybe even stop all the way inserted and kiss her deeply and romantically to play it off. Then restart thrusting. If that’s not enough I might pull out and change positions to calm down for a second, or maybe even give her oral in order to regroup… that’s just a few examples but there are tons of ways to last as long as you want!

  4. Penny4URthoughts says:

    Most men last about 3 minutes.

    Sometimes I give my husband a hand job, a blow job or have him masturbate until he cums. Then he gives me oral or just enjoys my body until he is hard again, usually about 15 minutes. Then he fucks my pussy and can often last 10, even 20 minutes or more. But he rarely doesn’t cum if in me while I have a full orgasm. Maybe some little ones, but not a full body spasm, pass out orgasm.

    • LilaY69 says:

      Penny, we would love to hear about your current or past sexcapades. I hope you have some cumming. Your comments are always intriguing and they make my pussy wet.

      God bless

      Lila, XOXO 😘

    • Penny4URthoughts says:

      Thanks LilY. My husband and I have many varied experiences that fall outside of sex in marriage. I see there is a "confessions of former swingers" topic here. Maybe I can convince him to write about doing that in his second marriage and why he has not suggested we do that. But my adventures during and between marriages include highly sexual but not necessarily what most consider moral activities because they included others I was not married to. But we are monogamous this time around.

  5. Tulsa says:

    I know the problem, too well.
    Our solution, which no doubt won’t work for all, is to have more than one orgasm. My first one is always too quick, but after I recharge, my second, and subsequent O’s take longer and longer. That works for my wife too, and she gets multiple orgasms too!
    Plenty of things to do and keep things moving while you are ‘recharging’. 😉 one and done? No way. Now and then, sure, but not too often!

  6. coboy78 says:

    I can only speak for myself, but assuming I've been masturbating for close to 30 years, and (on average) about twice a day (roughly 21,000 orgasms), it hasn't ruined sex with my wife. I'm sure that it's desensitized me on some level. If there's any concern it's often that I go on too long. We end up mutually masturbating a good deal of the time, both because of some health things that she's been dealing with and because if it's normal p-i-v sex it could be a good half hour before I can cum. I can get off more quickly in doggy style but even that can take a while sometimes.

    Anyway, I'd focus on learning how to edge through masturbation. learning how to reach the peak and back off is a lot easier when there's not another person involved. Eventually, you might be able to bring yourself up to peak several times before you finally blast off. (bonus, your orgasm will be a lot stronger. So, on top of being practice, it's fun as well!)

  7. HeSaid-SheSaid says:

    Did the pastor link E.D. to masturbation while engaging in visual porn and lust? Because I believe there is some merit in that in regard to wiring your brain to receive pleasure from those activities. But if a husband masturbates to thoughts of his own wife and/or pictures of her, he may not be making new neural pathways that distract from receiving pleasure from his wife because he is using material that is already familiar to him. This is something that psychologists would understand better and be able to inform on.

    Now, masturbation WITH your wife is a whole other subject….and an enjoyable one at that.

  8. hornyGG says:

    Horny Boy, I agree with Ben in that you have nothing to worry about. I also agree that as in anything, it will take practice. Masturbation is an excellent and pleasurable way to build your endurance. Edging while masturbating will indeed help in building your endurance.
    Jerking off 30 minutes or so prior to intercourse will take the edge off and help in lasting longer. Just relax and enjoy! Even if at first you cum rather quickly, Try and Try again!
    God bless you darlin and Stay horny!

  9. PatientPassion says:

    Since I'm waiting for marriage, I don't have any experience with intercourse or how to last longer there. However, I've been preparing to be better in various ways for my future wife, including sexually. In that time, I've learned that it can help to learn to consciously control your pelvic floor muscles.

    When you go to pee, gently hold back the flow and recognize what muscles you're using to accomplish that. I've heard it might be unhealthy to frequently interrupt the flow of urine, so once you've identified the right muscles, try flexing and relaxing them separately from going to the bathroom. Try to isolate them and use them without contracting anything else like your core/abdominal muscles. (You'll have varying degrees of success with that part. I'm still unable to fully separate the contracting and relaxing of my pelvic floor muscles from doing the same with my anus. I'm not actually sure if it's possible to separate those.)

    Learning to control these muscles will help your ejaculatory and orgasm control. While masturbating or having sex, keeping them relaxed (like when you're peeing) will make you orgasm slower, and contracting them (like when you're trying to hold pee in) will bring you to orgasm faster. I struggle with reaching orgasm faster than I'd like when masturbating, but I notice when I'm able to keep those muscles relaxed throughout a session, I take longer to reach orgasm.

    As a side note, when you have strength and control in these muscles, you can also contract them hard through your orgasm to hold back your ejaculation, which allows you to have multiple orgasms. If you're interested, search "male multiple orgasm" here on MH to see an article I wrote summarizing the concept and mentioning at least one resource I found helpful.

  10. New Wife says:

    So my next story, due in a few days, offers a solution, though one we use infrequently. Current, only rear entry presents an issue for us so we save that for last! My husband and I were challenged with PME early in our relationship but we (he) really worked on it. Lots of different techniques including Kegels, pauses, edging, etc. Not sure that there a perfect formula other than lots of practice, patience and understanding. Happy to report that after 15 years of marriage, my husband lasts as long as we want virtually every time! Nice!!! For both of us!!!

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