“Health” Issues and the Blessing of Marriage Heat!
A couple of years ago, in my late 30s, I was incredibly busy raising three kids and emotionally supporting a very hardworking husband, and overall my life was good, but there were a few things that I wished were better. First, our marriage was neglected BIG TIME. It isn’t that our priorities were wrong – we poured into our kids to so that they would happy – it was just we forgot that WE were a priority too. I started to feel “unsettled” in some way like I was bursting at the seams, or that my nerves were on edge. Whatever it was, I was feeling a bit on edge and felt like I needed to put all of this “energy” somewhere in a healthy and productive way.
I am already an avid “gym rat” so I was putting a lot of focus in my workouts, challenging myself to work harder to help work through this feeling of being unsettled. It was working! For a short time….urgh. After a while, I would just feel overwhelmed, unfocused and I couldn’t get a hold of myself. I was edgy with the kids, with my husband, and I was feeling like such a grouch, and I was unhappy with my feelings. I tried reading, hobbies, sitting in silence to gather myself……….nothing was working.
Very quickly I was noticing other “issues” creeping in. I wasn’t sleeping well at all, waking for long periods of time almost every night. I was also finding myself wet like my body was prepping for sex, and I was noticing that my mind was wandering to sexy thoughts. I was yearning to be touched and fantasized about sex with my husband. With our lives so busy and priorities in other places, we weren’t as sexually active as we should be, often going long periods between intimate times. But I wanted to find the time! We began to “find” the time, and it was wonderful! Not as often as I wanted, but we were working with what time we had. But…..I still had these feelings that I was growing increasingly uncomfortable with. I was crying all the time, emotionally all over the place, wanting to be alone….. just not myself and I hated it.
I was beginning to think that there might be something wrong with my thyroid. I have always teetered on thyroid issues, and my doctor has been monitoring me for many years. So off to my doctor I went. I explained my problems, and she agreed that she wanted to retest my thyroid as well as test for menopausal issues. After my results had come back, I met with my doctor again to discuss them. Everything was fine! Relief that my thyroid, while still not perfect, was ok and my hormone levels were all good. But what was wrong with me? I was sitting face to face with my doctor, discouraged and asking her what else could be my problem. She just touched my knee, looked at me with a sly look and said, “You’re in your late 30s………think about it. Go home and enjoy it!” Wink! My eyes went wide, “OH! It never occurred to me! How dumb of me!” We all learned in school that a males sexual peak was in his teens, which is obvious! But we also learned that a females sexual peak was in her mid to late 30s. Right in the throws of parenthood and careers, you forget about that piece of education. It all made sense – I was horny, and not just horny, but REALLY horny and I needed my sexual appetite to be fed.
I talked about this with my husband, but he didn’t seem to know how to handle the situation. WHAT!? He seemed overwhelmed with my sexual appetite. I decided to take matters into my hands, and I came up with a few things that could be done. First, I planned a romantic night away. It was lovely! And without interruption, we were able to have sex as much as we, well really I, wanted……….and we did! We also made it more of a priority to make time for sex. Even if we had to wake super early in the morning to get it on, or give the kids special snacks and put on a movie in the evening, we would squeeze in the time for sex. I was beginning to feel better! But there was still more that I needed to do because my appetite, while being fed, was still hungry!
I decided to research some sex options. I have always been careful about my internet searches in regards to sex. I wasn’t looking for pornography, but I was looking for advice on a healthy sex life, position ideas, ways to spice things up, etc. This was when I stumbled on to the Marriage Heat web site and what a God send it has been for me! I can’t even begin to express my gratitude for this site. I was reading about Christians who enjoyed sex and how they experienced it, Biblical advice and perimeters, ideas to try, and it was building my confidence in my sexuality. I read many stories about people using masturbation as an aid to help them until they could be with their spouse and I thought, ok, I’ll try it again.
Now I have never been a great masturbator. I have no issues with doing it, and have been doing it since I was a teenager, but for me, the effort it takes is too much, and my orgasms from masturbating were minimal at best. So it was better not to bother, so I only masturbated handful times a year. I had always been curious about vibrators, but I wasn’t keen on going to a sex shop. Now I have no issue with sex toys or even a sex shop, but I don’t like how some of the packagings is with toys. I find some of it degrading. I went online to do some research about what I might like and then I decided to talk with my husband about getting a vibrator. He was all for it! Once I decided on what type of vibrator I would like, we ended up going to a local sex shop to buy it, as well as to buy a vibrating cock ring! WOW! I love my vibrator, and it is a great way for me to help release my sexual tension when my husband is not around to do it for me! Much better than manual stimulation. I would never have gotten a vibrator if it weren’t for this site and seeing how others have used them to enhance their sex lives and to use it as a healthy tool when having sex with their spouse wasn’t an option.
My sex life has been so good this past couple of years, and I have enjoyed the wave that my body has been going through. My marriage is better, and we are closer as a couple. We learned that we need to be there for our spouse sexually, even if we didn’t necessarily need it, we need to do it for them. Marriage Heat has been such a healthy outlet for me, and I have learned so much from this site on how sex is so integral to a healthy and growing marriage relationship. My sex life has been amazing, and it continues to grow from where it left off so many years ago when babies started arriving. Thank you so much, and I believe that God lead me to this site! You are all inspirational, amazing, and examples to me.
Totally agree that this site has been so helpful. I'm new to the MH community, but so far it has been so encouraging and has given me a few ideas that I know would bless my husband. So glad you found MH too!
Belleame,
Encouraging is a great word to describe Marriage Heat. I think the education of this site is so great too. There is a lot of Biblical wisdom from so many voices and I think it gives strong examples of how wide the parameters of Biblical sex really are. I think so many in the Christian community place far too many restrictions on their sex lives.
Vibrators are fun indeed! I bought my wife her first… now almost 13 years ago. They can be quite helpful when we are not in the mood or don't have the time for intercourse. In fact, just last week we were masturbating together (we both love it). I was still on my back stroking my dick, and she rolled onto my side, straddled my leg, but was still working her vibrator on her clit. It was so hot as we were breathing deep and moaning right into each other's faces. We finished with a simultaneous climax. Mmmm, so good. Yes, we love vibrators indeed!
PacMan,
I never realized how beneficial a vibrator could be! It really did help me a lot. In trusted relationships, I will share my thoughts on vibrators and how it may help. I tell my husband when I do use it. I think it is healthy to let him know my sexual needs.
What a great story! So glad you shared!
Eva,
Thanks! I was glad to share it. Might be beneficial for some husbands to understand what some of their wives may go through.
I am so happy you posted your story Juicy! When I was reading your story, I kept thinking how similar our situations were, right down to being a gym rat ?. I stumbled upon MH the same way. We had let raising our children, work and everything inbetween put a wedge in our marriage and intimacy. It was my sudden frustration and intense want for my husband (which I believe was God answering my prayers) that led me to this site. Thanks so much for sharing Juicy, and I too am very thankful to MH and it's wonderful community.
Gracie,
Thank you so much! I don't know about you but this whole rise in sexual appetite hit me suddenly and came out of nowhere. It really was a substantial issue for me for a number of months until I figured out what it was. It wasn't comparable to normal horniness and really involved a lot of emotions too, hence why I thought it was more than my sexual needs. And my poor husband! I couldn't get it enough! It took some work on both of our parts but we have figured out a balance and come through it stronger.
Sounds so familiar to my life. It is amazing how our kids and work keep us so busy we forget that we need other things to keep us satisfied. It is such a blessing to know that I'm not alone in that struggle. My husband always seems ready for anything, I have to be able to clear my mind to be ready or feel I need to be in that frame of mind. Thank you for posting this. There are many days where I'm short with everyone maybe I just need to take it out with my husband between the sheets!
Gracie!
I am so glad to hear from you! Not because you are seeking some support, but just to hear from you! I so enjoy having a MH relationship with you! This is where I wish there was an open chat forum. Ok, so I am a bit older than you, 40 and glorious, but this happened a couple of years ago in my late 30s. And I am adopted, so not having tonnes of family history to go by, my GP did a work up and everything was normal. I did have some of your same symptoms – not sleeping, emotional, irritable, and almost sex starved. I too have a lot of stressors in my life with a husband who works long hours, leaving me with the bulk of the home and parenting duties (so thankful that I married a hard working guy!) and my oldest has special needs, both physical and neuro-diverse, so there is a lot of things to deal with, so stress is a major part of my life. But I try and handle things calmly and prioritize! If you haven't read "The Best Yes" by Lysa TerKeurst you must! It really helped me know and understand where, why, and how to prioritize what my responsibilities were and it took so much off my shoulders when I stripped down my life and figured how to prioritize what was most important. My stress reduced big time.
I also really learned to take time for myself. I think all mothers try and take time for themselves by having a cup of coffee, going for a walk, reading a magazine, but I mean REAL time for yourself. I began to do all of the things that I needed to do to make me feel like a woman, and to everyone woman, that looks different. For me, I began to wear make up again, do my hair, buy clothes that were fashionable (on sale or from thrift stores!), and wear frilly undergarments. I kept up with my workouts, made real social plans, bought scented candles, made my house more like a home (still a work in progress!), and got a vibrator! And you know what! It worked! I still have oodles on my plate, but I handle it so much better now that I really let myself know, and others know, that I am the first most important person to take of, my outlook and approach to life is healthier and I handle stress so much better.
Talking to my husband about my increased sex drive was difficult. Not because I didn't know how to talk to him about it, but because of his reaction to it. He actually retreated and pulled away and we had even less sex! Like almost none! I was befuddled, I mean what husband whose wife says I need more sex, doesn't give it to her?! I was handing myself to him on a platter and still, nothing. He was rejecting me left and right for sex. It was humiliating and reduced me to a very low point. I was at my wits end, feeling so rejected, so unloved, not beautiful, not worthy, not sexy, every bad feeling that a woman could feel about her femininity. I finally totally lost it at him, and it was ugly, but it worked. I hated the fact that I got to total crazed psycho beast before he clicked in, but the results have come. Now we have worked out a better schedule and it has paid off for the both of us. More and regular sex has lead to less stress for the both of us, a better relationship between us, and increased my confidence as a woman.
Now things are still a work in progress. I have fantasies and he struggles with some of them, and others he is great with. I try and take the approach that we still have a lot of years together and we have to leave some still on the table!
I am going to have to rely a little on your doctor's report and if they don't see anything askew on your blood work, then it probably is reliable. However, I feel that you need to keep up with it because you know your body best and if you feel something is off, then be your own advocate. And your people are still littles, while mine are just a wee bit older, which actually makes a difference. Kids are work no matter what age, but their dependence changes. It is a season, and I know that sounds patronizing, but it is true. It is a stage it will pass but it sounds like you need to make you number one so that you can be number one to your family.
Have a heart to heart with your husband, and not the crazed woman kind of conversation that I had with mine, it's not the most effective and very unflattering! Come up with a compromise that works for both of you. Lately we are in a slump and while having sex twice a week, it is so predictable and I am itching for some more spice (WAIT! I think one of my stories is being published tomorrow!) but I am looking to take things up a level, or at least a little less routine.
I don't think I was much help other than being a huge supporter of you! I wish you the best and keep me in the loop! We have got to stick together and I will lend you my ear (or computer screen) whenever you need me.
Gracie,
Women and friendships are a tricky thing and no one tells you how lonely motherhood can be. As women, we are usually very social beings but in the season of motherhood when kids are very young, it can be difficult to balance. While as moms with young ones we can be out to play groups, library reading times, arts/sports, church, etc, we socialize, but don't really get the opportunity to develop deep friendships. I still struggle with friendships. I socialize all the time and have friends, but I want the deep friendships. I have a few that I feel are trusted, but investing the time is a balancing act. We try to get together for apps/desserts/drinks, but now I am in the phase where mine are going to bed later and getting out of the house can be tricky because my husband has to go to bed early! I can't win!
I am trying to be more intentional about who I spend time with and learning who gives me what type of friendship. I have one friend who is fun to hang around with, we have lots in common, we enjoy one another's company, and are never at a loss for conversation, BUT when I really need some sound Christian advice, she isn't the one I bounce off of even though she is a Christian herself. She has some great perspective, but not the type I need. Then I have friends who I can't spend a lot of time with because of distance, but I can shoot them off a text/email/phone call with a problem, they take time to reflect and pray about it and come back with great advice. I have also learned to guard what I share and with whom, and I am still not great at it, but I don't want people to have some of my most personal feelings/life situations/perspectives until I know them well enough that they deserve to know. I would rather have a couple of great trusted friends, than have a whole bunch of surface friends, not that surface friends aren't important. It takes time, and it feels like forever, but take time and invest. Seek someone out. Invite them over for a mid-morning little brunch, invite them meet at a park with the kids, go to a home party of some sort.
I am very blessed that I have had some friendships since I was young, one actually from young elementary years, and we are still great friends even though we live an hour apart. I have great friends from university that I keep in contact with and I have a few friends here in my local area that I have made. I am also very blessed with the greatest sister-in-laws and I am close with them all, especially one of them, and she is probably my most trusted confident. But she too lives an hour away, but I am so thankful for technology. It has made keeping in touch with people so great in different ways. I am able to keep up with seeing nieces/nephews/cousins/aunts/uncles/friends with so much ease. And think, with technology, we are able to reach out to others and make friendships and seek advice when we feel that we don't have someone close to reach out to. I am very thankful for that!
Let me know how things go! I am hoping for a little spice tonight! And……..I am very thankful for you too!
Gracie!
YES! I am so glad that you #1 – were "kind of ravished" ; #2 – that you were satisfied ; #3 – that you are less edgy! Win, win, win! I really found that once we really began to make sex a priority and meet each other's sexual needs (well mostly mine!), I became better with my mood. It didn't happen right away but it didn't take long and within a week or so, little by little I felt so much more even with my moods. But there was commitment on both our parts to make it happen. And we both noticed my mood change after sex so it wasn't just a physical/emotional satisfaction for me, but it was for him too, not only physically but to have his wife be better in attitude was a satisfaction for him too. When I would get short tempered and grouchy, we began to realize that we needed to have sex to straighten things out. And we would as best we could. It really was a game changer for me and it may be a game changer for you as well.
And last night, we also had a chat and were on the same page. We both feel like we need to add a little spice a little more regularly, not that we don't have any, but we can fall into routine fairly easily. We have had some great romps the past few months, as per my stories here on MH, and while they might not have been the strongest of orgasms (mind you they were rip roaring still), it was about the experience as a whole that was just as hot and satisfying and met needs that can be difficult to quench.
My husband freely admits that he is not the creative one in the bedroom and that I am, but he loves the creativity and goes along pretty well with it. But a gal wants some creativity to come from her man as well! My mind hardly ever just stops. If I am listening to music, my mind daydreams. When I read, I really paint a detailed picture of the author's words. When I watch a film or tv show, I really get inside a character and understand nuances in a characters behaviour. When I do a crafty type of project, I get so into it I can't stop and I just have to let it pour out of me. I am also very quick to piece things together without a lot of direction. I can come up with a solution to a broken drawer, school project, busy schedule, etc. really quickly. My point, I have a creative mind and it never stops! So creativity in the bedroom is so important to me and it is a struggle when one of you isn't creative in that department.
After our chat last night, it was late and we turned out the lights and we going to go to sleep and well, one thing quickly led to another and we had a great romp in the dark! And then again this morning! He tried a little something new and well, let's just say I responded very well and had four equally strong orgasms, one after the other, and it brought me to tears, literally! We will work on the creativity! I keep encouraging to read more on MH and get some ideas and support. We will see!
And quickly, the friendship thing, I hear you on the true Christian issue. While I am very open to some things that are taboo for a lot of Christians, there are things that I am very strict on. I love to examine what my faith really is. Are some of the things that I grew up believing wrong or too narrow? Is this what the Bible really says about this or that? I still very much want to live within what God has designed, but I want my attitude and how I handle things and how I love to look less "Bible thumping" and more accepting without compromising or misrepresenting Christian faith. Finding others who really want to be challenging can be difficult.
I am so happy for you! I pray that the two of you keep it up. Keep in touch!
Hi Juicy and Gracie,
I had read some of the comments but not all until tonight
I really liked reading the dialogue between you both. I know the purpose of your dialogue was not aimed at others – but I want you to know that your heart's opened to each other had an affect on this man and husband.
I have worked with a good number of people in a counseling setting over the years. Without getting into percentages – much of what you two shared can be said by husband's as well – who find themselves yearning for the same things as you both mentioned.
There is so much to comment on and I just don't have the time right now.
Here is something that I think many Christians want: 1) a friendship that includes a common bond – that is shared, communicated, and talked about – even if they just have one of these friends – it makes a huge difference.
2) in the context of sex, we want a friend (hopefully our spouse too) who has a Biblical foundation – who also likes to be growing and expanding and being creative in the area of sex. A friend that it is safe to talk about this with. This kind of narrows the field in our ChristIan context! This is why MH is such a blessing!
Ladies, you two are meeting a huge need in each other's lives by your communication and friendship. Hence, the thankfulness for this medium.
I have to go, but I just want to say that what you both were saying is not uncommon for men and women with Christian convictions.
We need to be patient. Many of us have fantasies that we wish we could more easily share – and hope they would be received with loving enthusiasm.
MH is fostering conversationsthat have been held in check by many well meaning people.
So, I'm grateful that you two strengthened each other – and others who vicariously are where you both are!
Thank you both for your openness, willingness, and love. It is a model for us all on MH.
Even when we feel like we need more – we know we are not alone.
May we look to God and His Word together. He gives us all we need – even when we have to reach for it, wait for it – and often in and through the loving ministry of other people.
God bless you two! LH
Gracie and LH,
Aww…….I just saw this! Even though there are no faces and names here on MH, there is still validity to the support and online friendships that happen in places like this. This is like a support group ! There are times I wish I could just scream out "My name is……!" "This is where I am from!" "This is what I look like!" but the reason that we are able to share so freely on this site is because of the anonymity. It is a catch-22. You find support and encouragement and you may feel the desire to pursue a full disclosure friendship, but then you open up the realization that you have shared a lot of really personal information, stuff I have never told my closest family or friends.
I really look forward to reading stories and comments that are positive and uplifting and I try to be just that as well. Of course there have been times where I have thought, "Oh dear, why did someone say that in that way?" Even when I am uncomfortable with something someone has posted, I stay away from making any comment that may come off as negative or hurtful. I have expressed some flip sides to things so people can think and I have also taken the purposeful attitude of there is no need for me to comment on that and I don't need to add my monkeys to the circus! I try and be mindful that it takes some serious guts to share the things we have all shared on this site so I should be positive and not negative.
Thank you both so much for your wonderful comments and the conversations that we have exchanged. They really have be supportive and maybe there are others who have benefited from reading them as well. I really value the thoughts that each of you have shared and I often re-read them – see I am definitely a words girl! One day, we will meet up in heaven and have a great in-person MH reunion!
Hi Juicy,
A hearty "Amen" to all you replied with.
About the meeting in heaven….
How will you know it is me?
Oh yes, I'll be wearing a badge that says "Lovinghusband – MH Class of 2013"
All of this most wonderful, hearty exchange between the 2 of you and LH's input as well has been a big blessing. No doubt about it. Thank you for sharing!! God bless y'all!! Much love!!
An Amen from me as well Juicy, I couldn't agree more.
Thanks so much PFC! I'm glad to see it was helpful to others as well.
PFC,
A thanks from me as well! I really value the conversations that I am able to have here on MH. While the stories inspire spice, the communication between users is just as valuable and insightful. So good to hear from you!
Thanks Gracie and Juicy! I couldn't agree more with you, Juicy. Wonderfully put! I feel the same way about this precious MH community and you all in particular. I am so grateful for the fellowship and support we get to have on here in heart and spirit and for how we can help each other and inspire each other and encourage each other! I'm grateful to have you all on this journey with me! <3
Sorry for having been a bit much MIA lately – I am still in touch with Alex and November is nearing and from how it looks currently we will probably meet.
This simply beautiful and a blessing to see!!!
I'm praying for both of you ladies and my heart goes out to you two!
Thank you for sharing this conversation! I hope you both know that it is going to help me be a better husband once I get there and will be a blessing to my future wife! 🙂
And I am still confused on what exactly "ravished" means….?
Basically to be "ravished" by our husbands and for our husbands to be sudden and passionate with us. Remember how in "Time Of Our Lives" my husband suddenly "took" me? He was spontaneous and passionate, and it told me that he really wanted me then and there.
Gracie,
I know you addressed Juicy – but I want to mention something to you.
My wife loves what MH brings to our marriage bed – but is too shy – so it is me who has the interaction on here. I would not describe her as you did your husband "having no interest in it" – but her DNA is still to be very private about her wild side! It makes her feel good to know she is not alone as a horny Christian woman! She shows interest in what is said here – but comments on things that she likes. She likes knowing others are like us.
I tell you this to say that it is okay to let him be in his comfort zone – I know you know that already. I'd love my wife to be writing here – perhaps some day – but if that never happens – my importing from MH for the both of us works for us. There are others with this same experience.
So, I'm content with this – seeing that my wife is actually becoming more open. God's timing. We aren't trying to fix each other in this regard.
Anyway, I hope that encourages you in some way. God bless you both. LH
Hi Gracie,
A quick follow up. This is just my opinion – but I think many couples represented here on MH are like what you just described – my wife and I included. If you are putting sexual measuring sticks out – I am definitely MORE sexual than my wife. But the good news is that our spouses are not non-sexual! I think this is true with most couples – one is more sexual than the other.
In fact, it is hard for me to imagine a couple that is like totally in the same exact creative groove or the same exact sex hunger level. People are different. Part of the task of growing in marriage is working at this sexual oneness. And not even having the goal of being clones – but growing closer.
I can be so selfish! There are fantasies that I want my wife to want along with me. Some of them she already has. Some of them she shows an interested curiosity towards. Some she thinks I'm crazy! 🙂 But, I have learned to grow in not getting too frustrated over dreams or fantasies that have not come to pass yet.
I think that those of us who are the more sexually "open" of the two – we know that we are always open to anything our less sexually open spouse wants to do – and we want them to have the same openness towards us. Yet, it doesn't always work like that – which can have us doubting how "giving" they are to us – and can spur on selfish reactions that pours cold water on potential marriage heat. I don't think there are any magic formulas. We need to pray. It is especially hard for the spouse that is on the shy side when it comes to talking about sex.
So, in the case where both spouses are wanting and willing to read stories on MH – that can be a fun place to start. Asking, "What did you like in that one"?
But, for those of us who have spouses that are on the shy side of things (not meaning they are sexual) or who of habit to be private about sex – the thought of reading things about sex from real people can sound too public.
In our case, I relay aspects of stories and comments – and my wife likes the support of knowing that there are other Christians who are like us! So, she is a wild sexy woman much of the time – but her way is to still be very private about it in person. But, I must add – she is opening up in ways all the time. She is not as shy, not as private as she was.
Sometimes I cannot imagine anyone being more horny than me! And I wish at times my wife would be more horny "on demand". But that isn't my life! And I have nothing to complain about!! I enjoy masturbation when the time is not opportune for us. I think things that used to really disappoint me – and some things still do – that I have adjusted my expectations to a degree that I'm not so disappointed. But, I don't want to mis-characterize my wife – she is wonderful. She is sexy. She is fucking hot! I don't deserve anyone as awesome as she is. God has lessons for me (us) in all of this. We are not in heaven yet. Lovemaking and orgasms are little slices of something really great – but they are not heaven.
Finally, I like what you and Juicy wrote about ravishment. My wife likes to be ravished. My DNA doesn't understand a husband not getting that. But, I know there are a lot of other present weaknesses about myself that I don't presently see. I'm glad that you both get to experience being ravished. It is not like it never happens for you. Just keep letting your husband know how much you loved it! In time, hopefully he'll get the memo that is something that you really crave.
So, Gracie – those are just some my thoughts. I'm glad that we can bounce things off of each other and speak about these things in ways that does not denigrate our spouses – but is open and honest enough to help us understand better what our situation is. God bless you and your husband! LH
Juicy
I loved this testimony! I had read the comments but not the story
I really respect you – and how you searched and were rewarded.
God bless you. LH
LH,
Thank you so much – not only for your kind words, but for all the support you offer each contributor here on MH. You offer such insight and wisdom and I really appreciate your perspective and advice. You are a blessed soul of a man and your wife is a lucky gal!
Gracie,
We definitely seem to be MH dopplegangers! I love that! It is great to get perspective from others in all sorts of stages in marriage, but it is equally great to have someone who you identify with. My husband doesn't go on MH that much because it is a turn on for him! So he has to make sure he is in the right time and place to read it. When I discovered MH, I kept it from him for a while and when I felt that MH was a help in Christian marriages, I shared it with him when the time was right. He is very supportive of it and me participating. I did wait a long time before I commented or even shared a story, and did so with his blessing. I did consider the whole privacy and security issue as well, and I figured, even if my identity were exposed, while it may be slightly embarrassing, I have done nothing wrong.
And you are absolutely right about the effect that MH has had on marriage and faith. I have had a huge jump in confidence in what Biblical sexuality is supposed to look like. I am exploring my faith more and more and that is the most beneficial.
As for multiple orgasms, yes I am very multi-orgasmic and blessed to be so. It wasn't long into my marriage, probably days, when I realized that I could harness the power of multiple orgasms. I am not bragging and not trying not to be discouraging in any way but when I was first married, I could easily have between 8-12 (and often more) but as our sexual intimacy matured, I learned to harness better quality orgasms over quantity. And quality also came as we refined techniques. I can have them one after another or space them out, depending on what we are doing. I don't really know how to explain how to achieve multiple orgasms except when I feel an orgasm starting to wind down, I clench my pelvic floor muscles and I can tell within seconds whether or not I will have another and then another one rises. It took some practice because obviously when I was newly married and experiencing orgasms like that for the first time, it was overwhelming. But it has paid off! And my husband loves that he can bring me to multiple O's! It is a huge ego boost to him and makes him confident that he knows how to please his woman. He never wants me to have just one! I am a lucky gal!
Gracie!
Looking forward to your post! I know I had to pause for a while before I hit submit! I love stories, fiction or non-fiction, but I also really enjoy posts that are educational, advice, seeking support, etc., they are all so beneficial. I have been putting a few thoughts together about a topic, not a story, maybe I will finish it up soon and submit that. Blessings dear Gracie!