This is for the gentlemen out there to answer; After being married for nearly twelve years my wife and I were having a discussion one evening concerning our past, our past supposedly prior to us being together as a dating couple and as then a married couple. There had been other times when this topic had been broached and her revelation’s were always concerning a time before she and I became what was understood to be an exclusive couple.
But on this particular evening she for whatever her reason or motivation to do so revealed to me a secret that she had been harboring for as I noted earlier, nearly twelve years. She told me that night, that prior to our wedding day by about three weeks, that she had gone to a party and gotten drunk and slept with another guy. That is not the end of this story though….or the for me…the most devastating factors which resulted in me being destroyed emotionally. You see at the time that she committed this act of betrayal, she was pregnant with what at the time I had been told by her was my child, engaged to me having accepted a ring and wearing it, and as I said did this just three weeks prior to our wedding day. She kept this from me all of those years and then decided to “be honest with me”.
This revelation came many years ago. We are still married, but we went through some very difficult years after her confession. My reactions to finding this out were less than what the Bible has devised as guidelines and requirement concerning forgiveness. Without going into all that transpired I will tell you that her revelation caused deep, deep pain, a concern and doubt that my child was really my child, thinking that she may be telling me the truth about having slept with this guy, but in telling the story lied about the date and time of that happening…and that she actually slept with him prior to having found out she was pregnant.
Okay, because I have kept this secret of her to myself for all of these years, and never sought out the opinion of other men as to how they would have reacted if they had been put in the situation that I found myself in, I’m now asking as sort of an informal pole, how the men out there would have taken the news that I received had they been put in that same situation; girlfriend pregnant and leading me believe the child to be was mine, her having accepted my proposal of marriage as well as taken my ring to wear, …and then doing what she did such a short time prior to marrying me and then concealing all of this from me until twelve years into our marriage.
I seriously would like to hear from other men and have them weigh in on this as to what they would have done had they been put in this position/situation?
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