Southernheat: a MarriageHeat compilation
This month’s downloadable compilation for Ignite members is ready! It’s a collection of some of the hottest stories shared by Southernheat. You can access it here or find it in the menu under Ignite Content.
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Love these. Wish my wife shared the same desires. Been married 32 years and it’s been mostly a one way street. These stories help make it easier at times but I want it to be a reality for us!
Its never too late papaj. Seek counseling together or by yourself if necessary. Communicate with her and bless her by meeting the needs of her "love language". It's so worth the effort.
PapaJ glad you enjoyed my stories. I’m sorry for your sadness or feeling of rejection when it comes to intimacy. I think all couples have one who has a high drive and the other lower. We’ve been married 32 years, and in our case, I have the higher drive. We’ve learned to compromise, and he tries to please me anytime in other ways if he’s not in the mood for intercourse. He knows touch is my love language, and I can feel rejected and hurt if he does not have that interaction and connection with me. I have learned not to pressure him and to masturbate when he’s not in the mood. However, if I start to pleasure myself, that usually gets him in the mood anyway. But when I hit menopause, all my desire disappeared. He was then pursuing and I was rejecting him. I wrote a story or advice post about how I got my groove back. I was determined to enjoy sex again. There can be many reasons for her lack of interest. Do you have a good relationship in other areas of your life? Does she feel treasured, does she have self-image issues that hold her back? Issues from her past or upbringing?
I would suggest your wife have her hormones and thyroid checked. If those are out of balance then the libido doesn’t work. If it’s hang-ups from upbringing, then you can go to counseling and work together.
Communication is the most important thing. We have learned to enjoy the playtime and all the foreplay. We just enjoy the journey and don't focus on the orgasm. By not focusing on it so much, I have relaxed, and things just get better and better. Sex is much better than when I was much younger, so there is abundant life after menopause.
Don’t give up! Do everything you can to move forward and improve your marriage. It’s so worth it! Pray over your marriage. God can change things! I will be praying for you! Hope this helps.
The link to the menopause info
https://marriageheat.com/2019/01/19/great-sex-after-menopause/
Thank you Happy Hubby and Southernheat for your words of encouragement! I have tried to speak into my wife’s love languages especially in recent years but there is always room for improvement. I think there are hormonal issues at play as we are post menopause. I will check out the article. I think there are past issues that go way back that are yet to be healed also. She hasn’t wanted to go to counseling so that’s been hard I’ve gone off and on for a number of years. I do need to pray for us more. I think somehow it will change. We do have moments where it is wonderful just too spread out in my opinion. I’m having ED issues which doesn’t help either. I miss our youth! I wish I didn’t think about sex so much and could do without at times. I know the Lord is good and faithful and sees our hearts and knows our bodies and needs. He’s calling me to love Him more and more and bask in His love for me. Otherwise it would be really hard.
Southernheat,
Let me say that Gina and myself really enjoy your stories. They truly inspire us. Thank you and God bless you and yours.
Ben G.
Thank you both for your kind words!
Thank you, MH, for allowing me to share my stories and hopefully give a very positive example of a happy and hot marriage.
Your stories are incredible. I need to post a link to some of them within our community. Thank you for having the courage to express yourself.