A Shame-free Home

After reading about the benefits of naked living, and realizing that this is the way God created us to live, parents often wonder how to make the transition to a clothing-free home. Here are some basic steps to follow.

  1. Teach your family about what God has done for them to have this privilege. God created our first parents naked and called it “very good”. After sin and the fall of mankind, humanity self-imposed shame for fear of being exposed and vulnerable. Jesus Christ, who the Bible calls the Second Adam, died on the cross and restored our relationship with God. Therefore, because of what He has done, we can be naked and unashamed again. Make sure they know this is something God likes.
  2. Begin by setting ground rules for your family. Sadly, there are predatory people in the world who prey on children. As a result, many children are rightly taught about private parts and what other people are allowed to see or not see. One adaptation that can be made is to designate the inside of your home as “private space”. Make it clear that inside the home, and only if mommy or daddy is there, is the space where they are free to be naked. That way they maintain a sense of security and privacy, but can also be free of shame-based clothing. If this is the rule for the kids, it must also be the rule for the parents. With this rule in place, make sure that inside the home is the only place you can all be naked.
  3. Make it a gradual transition. Rather than just showing up naked one morning, gradually wear less. Dad can do work inside the house without a shirt on. Mom can wear loose-fitting clothing without a bra, or even be topless while inside. If you are nursing, don’t be embarrassed to do so openly where you can be seen by the rest of the family. Eventually, it can progress to not dressing after drying off from bathtime or sleeping in the buff.
  4. Make nakedness a matter of normal life. Don’t even comment about how great it is to be home and naked. Just go about your daily business of life. Make it feel as normal and natural as possible. But again, reinforce that this is only for inside the private space of the home. And once the kids mature, nudity will not automatically be equated with sex, and they won’t have the urge to look at forbidden fruit online. You will have “porn-proofed” your kids.

In the end, you know your family best, so do what works for you. These are only suggestions and a place to begin the discussion.

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20 replies
  1. tdx30 says:

    I think your point about creating a porn free future for your children is huge. When nakedness is disconnected from sex and is made a natural and beautiful gift of God, a young boy growing up will be far less tempted to seek out that which is off-limits ( a naked female form presented in a context that is sexually arousing) and view sexuality in marriage as a gift from God rather than the counterfeit Satan offers to the world. When my five year old and three year old grandchildren come out of the bath and dance naked with absolutely no inhibitions in front of me and others, they reflect in such a beautiful way the purity of our bodies as God created them. Their innocence has much to teach us about how far from Scripture our misguided prudity (the Puritans were godly people but they got this wrong) has led us down a path God did not intend.

    • NoahZark says:

      One effect that can have is sexuality being associated with relationship instead of stimulation and the allure of the forbidden.

  2. hornyGG says:

    I agree! My husband Ben and I have been living the nude life for sometime now and love it. We are empty nesters so the transition was easy. Thank you for sharing this!
    God bless and Merry Christmas to you and yours! Stay naked!?

  3. PatientPassion says:

    This idea has crossed my mind before, and I have to say, it appeals to me. I'm guessing I might have a hard time convincing my future wife, but I do wonder what it would be like for nudity to be normal in our household. I think it would actually be quite easy for kids, if we raise them that way from the start. The tricky part then would be explaining to them why other people are so worried about nudity.

    I'm intrigued by the idea of being "porn-proof." I don't think this would totally guard against porn, but I do suspect it would help a lot. I think our society has done us a disservice by so closely coupling nudity and sex, and I think it would be a very good thing to get used to nudity not always being related to sex.

    Nudity and sex are similar in this way though: they both seem way too taboo in the Christian community. People seem to think they're shameful somehow. They've been abused by the world, but they're both part of the creation that God called "very good." I don't expect everyone to start going to church naked, but I also don't think we should be so up tight about things like this.

    On a related and rather sad note, just a couple of days ago, I read an article on the Desiring God ministry's website that said it was "absurd" to use nudity in the worship of God (I believe they were speaking of the paintings in the Sistine Chapel). Unsurprisingly, there was no biblical support given for that position. I generally like their work, but once in a while, things like that come across that I just don't understand at all. But it should make us think deeply about things and ask whether our beliefs are coming from biblical truth or from our flawed society. If nakedness was inherently bad or shameful, God would not have included it in the things he called "very good."

    Thanks Noah for starting this interesting conversation!

    • NoahZark says:

      Thanks! I tie it to the concept in Scripture of Christ being the Second Adam. On the cross, He restored our relationship with God, so shouldn’t we be naked and unashamed again? (Gen. 2:25)
      Love seeing the hermeneutical gymnastics they do around Isaiah 20, where God directly commands Isaiah to go naked and barefoot for 3 years.
      Appreciate the points you made. 🙂

    • Oldersingle says:

      "Nudity and sex are similar in this way though: they both seem way too taboo in the Christian community. People seem to think they're shameful somehow. They've been abused by the world, but they're both part of the creation that God called "very good." I don't expect everyone to start going to church naked, but I also don't think we should be so up tight about things like this."
      Amen! – My church is starting a group for those struggling with pornography addiction and I am hoping to lend some wisdom, having lost many years to a misunderstanding of God's view of sex and nudity. Having a much clearer Biblical understanding, I am distressed to fine that the material chosen for this class may, and I stress may, be based on some of the "porno-prudery" view the Church has had for far too long. Sadly, many think the normal attraction God gave us for each other and our naked bodies is sinful and needs to be "controlled" with fleshly efforts, rather than being led by the Holy Spirit. I hope I am wrong.

  4. lttlb says:

    Step # 2 states: “One adaptation that can be made is to designate the inside of your home as ‘private space’.”

    Step # 4 states: “Make nakedness a matter of normal life… Just go about your daily business of life.”

    For those that choose this as a lifestyle, is this generally the ‘limit’ in their adaptation, in that it is confined to the inside of their home? I’m probably just too curious of a person, but a few questions come to mind. No disrespect is intended – like I said, I’m genuinely curious.

    We all know that clothing also serves a practical purpose in addition to covering one’s nakedness. I’m suddenly feeling quite ‘scratchy’ envisioning doing yard work sans clothing. And when I think of the blood-letting I did (even fully clothed in jeans, heavy gloves, and work boots) in cleaning out a briar patch a couple years back, I shudder to think of what that would have been like without clothing. I was ‘stabbed’ so many times in that mess, I literally bled through my blue jeans! As such, when you suggest that one make this a matter of normal life, how and where do you draw lines for things like this? Does it primarily stay within the home?

    And if an example like the above is considered extreme, how about this: How do you handle cleanliness or hygiene matters in this lifestyle? Little boys (and sometimes big boys) don’t always take care of things ‘back there’ as they should (even if they try to the best of their ability). Even if one is naked only inside the home, how does this lifestyle address this matter when various people sit on furniture and the like? Even if one is ‘clean,’ there is still a type of ‘footprint’ that is left, where ever one sits… or is there?

    How does this lifestyle deal with the ‘neighbors?’ If it’s done only in the confines of one’s home, then the neighbors might never know, but if it’s also moved to the outside… how does this lifestyle address what the neighbors might think/say/do if they are witness to this lifestyle? In the neighborhood I grew up in, there was arguably enough privacy that this could be done outside, and the neighbors might not know unless they knew where and when to be looking, but not all neighborhoods are like that. But if it’s assumed for the moment that it’s confined to the house, how does this lifestyle deal with neighbors (or others) who come to the door of one’s house? I live near some of my relatives, and it’s not uncommon for them to just ‘pop over’ for something. And what about that FedEx man that shows up with a random package to sign for? Or the Avon lady? Is there a flurry of activity to put on one’s clothes, or… something else?

    How does this lifestyle address the inviting of others to one’s home? It’s one thing for the FedEx man to show up, but what about when you have company over? What about when one of your children wants to have a friend over from school? Or how about when the plumber gets called to come fix something?… and you don’t know exactly when he/she is going to show up. What about when you have the entire family home for Christmas, and there are differences of opinion as to the need for clothing?

    Finally, in a society that generally accepts clothing as the norm, how do you deal with this topic as you live life, as it’s bound to pop up in many different ways? For example, if you have children, it might be somewhat likely that they will talk about this with their friends, who will then pass it along to their parents/teachers/others. They might even ridicule your children – kids can be awful to one another, let alone other parents who hear of it. What are the ramifications of this? Maybe it’s easy to say we need not care what others think if we’re not doing wrong, but to be brutally honest… I would think more than twice about sending a child to someone’s home who lived this lifestyle, if I knew nothing else about them. If I knew something different or they were my friends, well, maybe that would be different, I don’t know – I’ve never been in that circumstance. I’d probably just err on what I felt was the side of caution and not put children in that circumstance. And hopefully I cause no offense in saying that – I’m just trying to be honest. How does this lifestyle deal with this, so as to minimize the emotional pounding that might result, either by knee-jerk rejection from people (like I just described my reaction might be if I didn’t know anything different), or by cutting off opportunities to one’s children between them and their friends (if the idea seems ‘icky’ to them or as a type of ‘perversion’ by their parents), or differences of opinion with those you go to church with, or… many other things could be listed.

    Again, I mean no offense… I’m genuinely curious as to how you work through these things if you pursue this lifestyle. Seems like it would require a lot to pursue this, including a strong personality, but maybe I just make things too complicated.

    That said, I do have a memory about a substitute teacher way back in grade school. She was the best substitute I ever had for the stories she told and the things she brought to the learning environment. She had been to some Pacific Islands (Saipan I think?), and at the time she lived there, she said it was common for the local girls/women to not wear anything ‘on top.’ I think that was how she delicately described it to a room full of kids. In fact, they looked at her as ‘strange’ because she was fully clothed. Interestingly, the teacher said that she never did feel comfortable dressing (or undressing in this case) to their standard, though she did adapt her clothing to make it ‘closer’ to what they did. I think she said something about a strapless top. Hearing this as a kid was fascinating, particularly since it was before I knew anything about human sexuality, and long before I would have ever contemplated what this might mean to a ‘sexualized society’ such as ours. What a difference in perspective!

    • NoahZark says:

      One thing required could be a towel to sit on. That’s standard practice at most resorts that cater to wholesome family nudity.
      I live in the Great Lakes area, so outdoors, even at home, is not an option most times. Hypothermia is real!
      Company would be a case by case thing. Like-minded families are one thing, but those who don’t understand or have been indoctrinated with the semi-gnostic teaching of the body being evil would be different. Just frame it as “they don’t understand yet”.
      Regarding neighbors, they make drapes and blinds for a reason. And if they are snooping, report them as peeping toms!
      I think that with a large family, it will also be less traumatic when children grow up seeing others in various stages of development. It makes their own growth an expected thing and less scary.
      The Second Adam has restored our relationship with God, so we can live in the freedom He won back for us without manmade shame or hiding the image of God.

  5. HigherQuest says:

    On a biblical and moral level I see no conflicts here, but on a pragmatic level I'm not so confident. In the world we live in, where body shaming and revenge porn is as prevalent as it seems to be, one of the concerns I'd have is when the children become adolescents and teenagers. What is the likelihood of their friends finding out their whole family hangs out naked in their home, sneaking by their home, taking some photos of the naked family, and posting them on snapchat, instagram, twitter, reddit, etc.? It's one thing to say there is nothing immoral with family nudity but in the current cultural environment we live in how would those teenagers fare at school?

    What is the possibility that Family Services could be called in by a neighbor who sees the whole family naked in their home and concludes "Hey, we think child porn is being created in that home!"

    Personally, I think the family who would like to experience family nudity might do better to plan a yearly family camping trip to one of the many Family Nudist Resorts. like Cedar Waters Nudist Park in New Hampshire? They are a Christian Naturist Camp and have a "Non-Sexual Social Nudism" approach.

    In our home, that is an empty nest environment, we love to hang out nude at times, and as I've expressed in other discussions here we enjoy couples erotic videos at times, but, because of the predominance of Christians who have not done their own personal indepth study of Scripture on the acceptability of moderate eroticism, we never talk with our family, friends, colleagues, or acquaintances about our personal sexual liberties. It would just create too much drama to be worth it. We see the Christian culture transitioning, but we are not ready to become public trailblazers yet.

  6. southernmost says:

    This was an interesting post and I think it's on the mind of many Christians, especially those who start exploring sexuality and nudity separately from what the church has taught over the years.

    Rightly mentioned, there's no condemnation of nudity in the Bible, no law against it. There were times that nudity led to someone sinning (David desiring Bathsheba), but nudity is not sinful of itself. Nudity was also very symbolic in the Bible and we see it being used in differently, such as it being used as a symbol of shame or poverty.

    I think context is very important when it comes to nudity though. Imagine a family in Biblical times: many families would have lived in a tent which only had one room. It is most likely that family members would have seen each other naked as they dressed or washed, and if they indeed had communal washing areas, all the more so. Nudity must have been far more common and prevalent in these times.
    But take today's time too for instance: someone rightly mentioned that women went topless in the place she visited, it was customary for them so do so. Take many Scandinavians who visit saunas together, naked, and many other European families who have a more lax attitude to nudity, like the Germans or French. It is only the Western world that has managed to degrade nudity to something awful. It is true though that nudity can be very arousing. We just have to realise that sometimes we're going to be turned on by naked people – if we aren't, then there's something very wrong with our biology. But on the other hand, we cannot over-sexualise it either.

    The point I try and make is that, concerning something like nudity, we have to see how we can express it in our given society. This post largely deals with nudity at home, which is probably the best approach in a world where nudity is only sexual. But if you're Finnish or an islander from the East, society might allow you to go greet your neighbours with a cup of coffee in the buff. I'm not saying we should allow society to dictate to us what to do, but even Paul said "To the Jew I became a Jew, and to the Gentile, a Gentile". This was of course to spread the Lord's Word. He fitted into a particular society so as to be able to do God's work. Well, I think we should do the same if we want to know how God wants us to live. So this was a good post and I think one could apply it differently in each society. However, if one is a recovering porn addict or one is easily tempted to commit illicit sexual acts, then nudity might be a stumbling block. So it's also down to personal conviction. I do think, however, there's a lot of strength in raising children naked, so that they know the difference between sex and nudity, and when to express what.

    Good post Noah, I enjoyed reading it.

    Kind regards,
    Southernmost

    • Flying Hubby says:

      I love this topic as being nude is both comfortable (unless pulling brambles) and liberating. As far as it being sexual in nature that is/was a fleeting moment in time. When first exposed to nudity it is somewhat titillating but very soon it’s just people without clothes on. You still scan to see who is around but the titillation and arousal goes away, you get so saturated by the exposure it becomes the new normal and you don’t have to worry about an embarrassing moment. I see a lot of people on the beach and I never see anyone in an awkward situation however, on one occasion I did see a couple who were trying to be discreet under a blanket but that is very rare.

  7. Beachlover Guy says:

    Love this topic! My wife and I were nudists before we met and have continued going nude indoors and outdoors together, as weather and society permits. We enjoy going to nudist resorts and beaches, as well as going nude at home. We have a few nudist friends and although nudity doesn't mean sex happens when nude with others, we can see how it could happen if people are looking for that. We have done nude webcam chats with other nudist friends and it's always fun to meet like-minded Christian nudists who don't see that as wrong.

  8. NoahZark says:

    Beachlover Guy – that is so encouraging to hear! My biggest struggle as been finding fellowship with like minded believers on this subject. Glad you are blessed to be able to do so!

  9. Stag-on-a-hill says:

    I also love nudity. I hope our society and the church become more relaxed about it. If nudity was a normal part of life (like the saunas in Sweden) we would be used to our bodies and to seeing others’ bodies, and shame wouldn’t develop quite so much. Whatever we say in church about how wonderfull the human body is, if we always have them covered that sends a negative message. There needs to be a context where nudity is experienced in the normal rhythms of life if a society is to have a healthy view of the human body. In the Roman world of the New testament, everyone bathed nude at the public baths, or publicly at a river. This meant people were more relaxed about their bodies. What can we do in our society?

    • Jhollon2 says:

      Another truth about being more relaxed about nudity is it would put a lot of adult businesses out of business. When something becomes common people do not objectify it. The human body is the same.

  10. Stag-on-a-hill says:

    Yes. And it will be interesting to see where the new trend of barely-there clothes is going. (At least for women). It’s amazing to see so much breast and bottoms. Does anyone have an idea of where this trend is going? It’s driven by celebs on instagram, but I wonder how much of this is driven by pornography in its 1,000s of forms. Nudity and revealing clothes are cool right now. Will that change? Where is all this heading? Will we begin to see women breastfeeding in public with everything showing? Will more US states make topless legal? So many teenage girls are pushing the envelope wearing revealing clothes at school, saying to parents who are concerned about this that they have ‘internalised hatred of women.’ It’s all fascinating. Is anyone a culture predictor? What should we expect to see next? Even on this site, quite a few of us are pushing the envelope on revealing clothes in public and even sex in public. Where is our society heading? Where would we like it to head? Interesting days!!!!

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