Toy Suggestions

I’m looking for some advice. I appreciate the candidness of the MarriageHeat community when it comes to your sexual experience. That said, I am looking into buying some toys for myself. My wife loves her vibrators and uses them frequently, and I’ve been thinking I’d like to get a little more adventurous during my own solo sessions. I’m 26 and have about 13 years of high-quality jacking experience 😉  I’ve never tried any toys, however.

I’ve found that since Julie and I got married, I masturbate much less than I did before. We have sex frequently, and I like to save my semen for those times (the extra cum-volume is worth it!) But when I do masturbate (maybe 2x weekly), I like to take my time and edge for a while. I’ve been looking at fleshlights, penis pumps, prostate massagers, etc. and I’m really up for trying anything but not sure where to start. I’d like to invest in something that is high-quality but would like some specific suggestions so I don’t waste a lot of money. What would you say is a good place to start?

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28 replies
  1. archer80ok says:

    Best place to start is a C-ring. These are fun for solo and with your wife. My advice is get a plain one that goes around the shaft and base. These are very cheap. For vibration the Ohare rechargeable is good for you and her. If you want to get one that just goes around the shaft and vibrates don't bother with the cheep ones get the Pivot by We vibe. Great for solo or partner.

    • YoungCouple69 says:

      What appeals to you about the cock rings? I've never tried one. What sort of effect do you get with one of these?

  2. Sarge says:

    Great question, I’m pondering the same thing lately. I’m 64 and have 60+ years of jacking off experience, but now that I’m widowed (9 years), but with a strong sex drive, I’d like to up my game a bit too.
    I like the suggestions from archer80ok, but I’ve also been contemplating getting a fleshlight too. I know this is weird, but at my age I’m afraid that when my kids go to clean out my house after I pass away, that they’ll wonder just how freaky their old dad could get. 😁😂 I do think I’m going to invest in the cockring however.
    Thanks for the question.

    • alwayswet101 says:

      Believe me they will be glad that their dad was pleasuring himself. In fact they definitely are aware now! Everyone has needs. That cock sounds like he’s still living and so should you 😉

    • Sarge says:

      alwayswet101. Thanks for the encouragement, my kids might suspect I do, but if they thought about their dad doing such a thing they may need counseling. 😂
      My cock does okay, but help would be useful.

    • Ron33 says:

      I wouldn't worry about it. I had to clean out my parents house and found a few sex toys and books. I was happy they had fun! My mom had lots of lingerie.

  3. Tulsa says:

    Best toy I have ever used is the Magic Wand. It's my wife's actually, but she tried it on me one day, and I have found nothing better!
    First time she used it on me, she was kneeling in front of me while I was standing, and she lifted up my balls with the head of the wand and pressed it against the base of my cock. Plan was to cum on her tits. Fail. When I started cumming, my cock started bouncing up and down, and she had cum on her from her forehead to her knees!
    Tried it myself when she was away. Same effect! Used it for her to watch as well, which is an audience pleaser! 😉
    Magic Wand: Good investment and works for both!

  4. King Arthur says:

    Good discussion. We use the Magic Wand. I use a cock ring and a prostate massager. Both work well. We have lots of other toys, but my hand and the MW are our go to toys because we are both 64 and things don't work like they use to.

  5. MarriedtoaHotBabe says:

    Although we have several toys for my wife (just different kinds of vibrators; we tossed her dildos as we ultimately decided they weren’t a healthy expression for us), I have never felt comfortable venturing into getting a toy for myself. I really enjoy using Astroglide on myself—feels great. That said, during intercourse, if Lauren has her wand vibrator pressed against her clit, I can feel some of the vibration on my cock and it feels sooooooooooooo good.

  6. Emun87 says:

    Based on the idea that your wife does know about it… which knowing always makes it better, secrets are not a good thing. I'd suggest a shower mountable fleshlight. You'll likely need to work your way through a few until you find one to your liking. It took me 4 or 5 until I hit on one that did the trick.

    • YoungCouple69 says:

      Wife is totally on board. Fleshlights are expensive though! 4 or 5 is a lot to try out not knowing which I would like. What makes you like the one you settled on?

  7. LovingMan says:

    Lately our current go-to vibrators are all small. They are the Sensuelle Pointplus (a rechargeable bullet vibrator), the VeDO Gee mini vibe (G-spot vibrator)(available in battery powered or rechargeable), and the Doc Johnson iVibe bullet vibrator with a loop (also rechargeable).

    Like MarriedtoaHotBabe… when my wife uses one of the bullet vibes on her clitoris while we are having sexual intercourse, I love the way the vibrations reach my erection through her vaginal wall. The vibrations REALLY help keep me hard and reach orgasm. But personally I can’t stand any of the vibrators directly touching either my penis or sac/testes, (unlike Tulsa). Everyone is different, so that’s OK. Maybe you’d LIKE a vibrator touching you there.

    For me we got a simple silicone (I think) non-electric male masturbator. The first one we got was too small. We lubed it with coconut oil and it felt nice – sort of. It was just too tight and too short. Not that it’s terribly important, but I’m somewhat on the large size down there, so we found a bigger size called “Big Man Masturbator,” and it doesn’t cause pain, and I don’t pop out the far end. It’s actually a little TOO big but still nice. I guess I need a “Sort-of-Big-Man size. Both masturbators are easy to clean. I squirt Dawn dishwashing liquid in & run hot water through them. My wife will stimulate my nipples as I use one of the masturbators and in spite of neither being the perfect fit … they’ve helped me to epic orgasms! Sometimes as my wife licks, flicks, & sucks one of my nips, I’ll pinch the other as I’m pumping the masturbator. We lay a heavy towel down first to prevent oil stains on the sheet.

    I have used the Doc Johnson once for anal, and it was nice however not epic, and I may or may not try that again. It is not a big vibrator or I wouldn’t have tried it. Because the iVibe has a loop handle you can securely hold onto it and not lose it up inside. From reading MH, I guess some men enjoy that kind of stimulation a lot.

    By the way, the Doc Johnson iVibe’s loop handle makes it much easier for my wife to hang onto it when she’s using it, but the Sensuelle Pointplus is just a bit more powerful. Both can trigger an orgasm for my wife. Often her orgasms are huge when the VeDO Gee mini vibe (G-spot vibrator) is inside her at the same time.

    I hope that many of you may find this information useful.

  8. Keystone Jack says:

    I'm one that does not do well with vibration on my manhood. I love to feel my wife cum with me inside, and she usually requires the wand to reach that climax. If the vibration translates to me too much, I actually start to soften. We've learned ways to work with that. So, I don't use any type of vibration on myself.

    I once received, as a free gift, a one-time-use male masturbator. It felt really good, but one time…

    I have enjoyed using various toys on my prostate in my alone time. One is the Feeldoe. It has a great curve that makes it easy to hit the spot. It's supposed to be a strapless strapon, but I can't imagine a woman being able to keep that in while using it on someone else. Another is the Aneros. It is actually classified as a medical aid for prostate massage treatment.

    I have just ordered a couple of rosebud urethral sounds. I have experimented with sounding some and liked it. These are supposed to be able to reach the inside of the prostate. They come in tomorrow. I already have some surgical lube. I'm anxiously awaiting the first opportunity.

    Edging is wonderful. It's better if your wife does it for you, but it's a pretty big gift on her part since it's a lot of work. I'm not very good at it on my own.

    I agree with Emun87. Make sure this is wife approved. I have encouraged my wife to have solo sessions and tell me about them later. It is so hot to hear about! She has told me she doesn't mind my solo sessions, but doesn't get aroused hearing about them. She does like hearing about what I've learned about my body and my pleasure.

    • YoungCouple69 says:

      Wife is definitely on board. I don't masturbate often and have never tried toys–just interested in what's out there that might be fun to try. How did the urethral sounds go? I've heard of those before, but don't know much about them. I've wondered about the aneros too. Is the prostate super-O real?

  9. hornyGG says:

    My husband Ben has a Fleshlight, a pocket pussy and a prostate stimulator, as well as a butt plug. He enjoys them all, but his favorite is the Fleshlight. He says to him, it is the closest to the real thing.

    • YoungCouple69 says:

      Have you guys tried using the plug or prostate stimulator during intercourse or have those mostly been for solo time? Curious what it would be like during sex.

  10. 1blessedman says:

    Super Head Honcho is a great open end sleeve. If you are long enough to pop your cock head out the end, that is amazing. No fleshlight but having the Honcho and looking at the fleshlight, I think the fleshlight is probably awesome. Thinking of the Aneros Syn…..their original design with improvements. Have had some cock rings that accommodate one’s balls as well. Those are super hot! Must keep track of time when wearing cock rings. They must be removed periodically to allow normal blood flow.

    • YoungCouple69 says:

      Head Honcho isn't too pricey. Has it held up ok? I've looked at the Aneros line as well but have no experience with prostate toys.

  11. StillLikeNewlyweds says:

    If you have a wand I highly recommend one of the stroker attachments. We just got one and it was an incredible experience (working on a story about it now). There’s a lot of different types to choose from. She has used the wand on me before and I liked it, but this was something extraordinary.

  12. SecondMarge says:

    I enjoy vibrators that look as much like a real cock as possible. Helps my mind fantasize, including a very hot one when we used it as a prostate stimulator for my man.

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