Same Room Sex Fantasy
Hi friends! Long time reader, first time writer. My wife and are still in our 20s and discovering new fantasies and things we would like to try while we’re still young and relatively appealing!
We have a close friend couple that we’ve known for several years that are very sexually open with us. I don’t know how else to put it—my wife and I have a shared fantasy of having sex in the same room as them, and have even “crossed the line” during sex, and talking as if they were in the same room watching us make love. It’s a massive turn on for us both, and we really enjoy the fantasy.
There was a story not long ago called “An Exhibition Fantasy and Discussion” where the topic came up of having sex in the same room as a friend couple. Many people shared the same enthusiasm that we do, but I didn’t hear many opinions or personal stories of how people found themselves in this type of situation with their friends, and how their friendship played out afterward.
We’ve talked about setting up a weekend getaway where we can stage this sort of event to happen, but haven’t had the guts just yet!
Is it wrong to have this fantasy? Is it wrong to want it to actually happen? We have very little interest in actually swapping with the other couple, but it’s probably the biggest risk that you good folks will bring up.
I’d love to hear a good discussion on the topic and receive some advice of how to proceed!
Thank you everyone!
Welcome to the authorship’s side of MH!
I don’t think it’s wrong to have same room sex with another couple, but I do think that a different approach might be less risky.
Instead of staging a weekend getaway, perhaps sitting down with them in a non-sexual setting might be better. This would allow to have an honest discussion about boundaries without being in the sexually charged environment of a private cabin or condo away from home. It would also give space for them, (as well as you and your wife), to go home and have some time to think about it.
If strong boundaries aren’t laid out and agreed upon, crossing the line in the heat of the moment would be really easy to do.
It may be that they are open to it, and it may be that they are not, but nothing is worth risking your marriage or testimony.
There are some couples on here who have done this, and some have said frequently, but everyone has to be on the same page.
Just my two cents…
Thanks so much, KM. Really appreciate the advice!
Wifey here- we are also in our early 20s. It wasn't even a thorough for us but it happened. We went on a double date with our friends and we were all flirting. Towards the end of the date my friend pulled me aside and had shared they were still waiting to move out of his parents' basement so they were always afraid to have sex. She asked to use a spare room after the date. I said of course! I even offered to let them in and head somewhere for a bit with hubby but she pitched the idea of the same room. In the car ride home we shared and agreed on boundaries. It was a great night and we all learned something from each other
That’s awesome! Thanks for sharing. I have no doubt that it will happen at some point, it’s just the setting the boundaries part that I’m nervous about. It’s something I can see happening naturally, but I know it’s important to set boundaries first.
I'm not sure if my background as a former "swinger" makes me a very good contributer to this conversation, but there is a definite risk of relationship creep. If I were in a hotel room with friends while traveling or on vacation, I wouldn't expect them to refrain and would enjoy the knowledge that they are enjoying themselves, probably be turned on by it and do the same. But planning it is a step further, and I'm not sure I would risk the temptation to go engage more, even though I have no desire to return to the "lifestyle."
That said, the fantasy (in our case, memory) of those senarios is a common turn on and one we engage with via fantasy play even today. Is that sinful? We believe not, seeing it as a healthy way to do together what turns us on without disobeying God who knows the true consequences due to human nature and warns us against swapping and such.
I think we are way more sensitive to knowlege of other people's sexual activity in our part of the world and our time than in others. Hearing others enjoy their own spouse or seeing from afar the activities of a couple enjoying the relative privacy of nature wouldn't have been as big a deal. But did folks seek out opportunities to have sex in front of each other? I think that at least borders on the pagan orgies warned against in the NT. And if it becomes habit, especially if alcohol or other substances are lowering inhibitions, I think the likelihood of eventually stepping outside even pre-determined boundaries increases.
Thanks so much for the advice – it’s exactly why I wanted to toss it out there. I think it’s something we would have to set clear boundaries on first.
CHL, will you join the discussion on […]? I'm really looking for input from gals about toys…Also would love to get some advice on toys to make myself squirt (I know you can squirt like a freakin gyser) haha 💦
[Edited by MH: All of these subjects are encouraged discussion topics here on MH, and there are a number of previous posts on those topics where you can read members' recommendations, and even re-ignite the conversation if you'd like! But due to the less regulated environment of the site you mentioned, and the inability to ascertain whether the content and discussions will align with our values, we're not comfortable sending our members over there. Sorry!]
JacklynLovesToJill, when it comes to squirting, my sex machine is the best toy particularly when watched. Hubby loves to hold me from behind when I release all this juice all over the place 🥰 love to join a discussion…hit me above…
Wow you remember my post!!
For the record, we’ve still never done it. I actually wrote another similar post recently about that fantasy and describing what I imagine it would feel like to be watched while either touching ourselves or having sex, based on actual dreams I’ve had while sleeping.
MH approved it.
But in real life? I doubt we ever will.
Vanessa said she’s not sure she’d enjoy it as much if it was so planned out as you described and not completely spontaneous, although she, like me, definitely does fantasize about being watched, and it’s something we occasionally role play in bed together.
We have discussed staying at a certain hotel where it is basically shrugged off and actually even encouraged a bit for people to have sex with each other visible to passers-by (sort of a marketing strategy in a very bohemian red light district of a very bohemian city). However, we axed that idea as well because Vanessa didn’t particularly like the idea of just ANYONE seeing her like that, although I myself frankly wouldn’t care who saw us as long as they were adults and knew what they were getting into. But I can totally see where she’s coming from.
Another thing is, like you said, we are getting older. She’s in her mid thirties and I’m a couple of years older than her. Trust me, confidence about sexual looks fades pretty fast once you hit thirty, and I didn’t even lose my virginhood until we married and I was 29. So for my most horny years, I was still celibate.
So the final argument about that in my mind is, if I survived my most horny years without doing anything crazy, then I probably can survive the rest of my life without doing it either.
It will most likely remain a fantasy.
Of course it’s different for the two of you.
Everyone has their own limits, just like alcohol. I don’t know you guys and your stories. But I have a pretty strong threshold both for alcohol and for sexual self control it seems. Vanessa? Based on stories she’s told me from before we met, not really. It’s very easy for her to be swept away into something not good if the hormones and the mood are intense. So as her husband I also have to watch out for her.
One must weigh all things, in situations like this.
Praying you and your wife make the BEST decision. If it ever happens, feel free to tell us how it goes.
God bless.
Thank you so much! Appreciate the feedback and advice. My wife is also the apprehensive one in the relationship, but I think if the right mood hit, it could be brushed aside.
My wife is the same way. She can go absolutely nuts in the heat of the moment, even moreso than me, while I tend to keep my wits about me and be more “premeditated” when it comes to sex.
And lest I sound like a prude, she and I have put on some pretty bold PDA’s, and have intentionally been overheard having sex, both in person and in posts online. Being watched though is still something we haven’t done and that we both have some apprehensions about, but for different reasons, so for now (and possibly forever), it is a fun fantasy we enjoy.
Great post and I hope we hear more from you in the future!
I think we both have some of our own self-consciousnesses to work through before we can see this happening in reality. Again, it would have to be a very natural situation and just the right amount of foreplay and teasing I think.
As for the concern of things escalating into swinging. I don’t think that would be much of a temptation for me personally, but everyone is different. And seeing as I’ve never actually been faced with that situation, there’s no way to say for sure.
That said, I HAVE been faced with some temptations as a youth with other youths I was close with, that were not sexual in nature at all.
In one case we snuck into someone else’s property when we had no business doing so. Another time I am ASHAMED to say, I helped deliver a beat down on another youth. So I do understand the concern of things escalating into swinging. Did I pre-plan either of those things? No, they were spontaneous, given the environment and the emotional state that hit me in the moment. Get what I’m saying?
Still, I’m sure many Christians have had same room sex either out of necessity or desire, and managed to keep their dignity and witness intact. So I’m not trying to say “don’t do it”, in fact, part of me sort of hopes you can since I think I’ll probably never get to.
I’m just trying to give any helpful advice I can, as someone who’s lived a lot of life.
I’ll definitely share the experience for you if/when it ever happens for us. Thanks!
The easy answer is about the fantasy. No, any type of fantasy is never wrong or sinful. You can fantasize about robbing a bank, cheating on an exam, or having a fivesome in bed (LOL). Fantasy can just remain fantasy, even if the action in the fantasy is morally wrong. Actually doing same room sex, I think it’s not a black-or-white (like most decisions). You need to ask yourself “Is this healthy, beneficial, and positive for all parties involved?” Every couple’s answer will vary. Some couples it will harm the friendship or cause marriage fractures. Other couples will have a stronger marriage bond and a deeper friendship. So explore the emotions and make a decision based in wisdom, not just “other couples’ stories from the internet.”
Thanks for the advice!
I have some thoughts. How open r u with each other? I mean would u make out or feel each other in the presence of the other couple? Are u comfortable being nude or scantily dressed with them around? Have u been watched or caught in bed by them or one of them or in general and how it felt. If so, having sex in the same room might be just one level up. Starting it gradually sort of or step by step maybe a better approach than planning it. Like falling in the habit of doing something naughty in their presence at a time so u ease your way into it. Now if u like it, having sex in the same room might become a habit or addiction which is the riskiest part of it. So boundaries need to be clear and respected.
Me and hubby love it as a fantasy and did it multiple times with different close couples and would do it if it feels right. The experience is amazing and hot if within limits and boundaries. It’s about watching and being watched, watching us how much we love and satisfy each other and how hot and sexy we are.
The scenarios and details can be many and a big turn on 🥰🫦🔥
God bless u and best luck!
Thanks so much for the advice and encouragement! It’s probably something we’ll ease into. My wife is more apprehensive about the idea, but I think it’s something I can slowly warm her up to (no pun intended 😂)
I agree with CHL. I love fantasies.
I will add this. Years ago, not out of absolute dire financial necessity – but of room economy and availability – we shared a room at a resort hotel for one night. We were there for 4 nights. On the first night – there was only one room available – and we knew this months in advance. We were asked by the other couple if we were okay with this arrangement for only one night…we said sure. We traveled together and never spoke a word about anything sexual – not even innuendo.
I had been away from my wife for work prior to our trip. So, we were horny. We had told each that we would have to make it to the second night. But…
We were fairly sure the other couple was asleep. We were spooning – and one touch led to another. We were being silent – we thought. Her hand was now pumping my hard cock – as I had one finger in her ass hole as my other hand fingered her wet pussy. We were supposedly – in our minds -not aiming for orgasms. Just silent enjoyment of touch. Well…
A couple of things happened. Tiny noises from her pussy being so wet, my sucking her nipples. My wife was the most careful – but was losing some degree of self-control. If she wanted this to stop – she would have quit pumping my cock. The other thing was our breathing! The room was a temperature that it needed no AC at that moment – making it silent.
We now had convinced ourselves that we could cum silently. In other words – we wanted it and were willing to risk it. We came. We had not accounted for the smells of sex.
For us on that occasion – I didn't have one thought of the other couple in a sexual sense. I was only into my wife – not even a fantasy or thought. Perhaps another couple would have been different. Or, if I had heard them being sexual – it would likely have turned me on. That event happened organically with no plan. Would it be hot to be fucking in the same room – each couple hearing the other? Yes it would. But, I think it would be safer happening like us on that one night – happening with no plans in the dark, impromptu. Any conversation or comments – not happening until likely the next morning. Of course, so much depending on knowing the other couple and their convictions. Two couples could theoretically agree to a lot of things beforehand – but I agree with CHL on the risk.
8 years later…do fantasies about this kind of situation turn me on – yes! Can I imagine a safe enough couple to pre-plan this happening? I guess it could be possible – but so risky. If inhibitions dropped – the results would not be worth the risk. A delicious fantasy it will remain.
Did that couple hear us? I think the wife did.
Thanks for sharing! Appreciate the advice!
“Can I imagine a safe enough couple to pre-plan this happening? I guess it could be possible – but so risky. If inhibitions dropped – the results would not be worth the risk”
I am the same way with confrontation and fighting. I have to be very careful. I think sex, while much different, can have similar “slippery slope” tendencies for many people. It’s just the way it is.
To say “I won’t do this”, “I won’t cross that line”, is one thing, but when your heart starts pounding and your hands are shaking. That’s when you really find out what you’re capable of, for better or for worse.
Yeah, based on where my own fantasies travel to, I can see it going much further if alcohol were involved. I don’t handle alcohol well and it lowers my inhibitions almost entirely.
One other thing…
I forgot to mention. Had I been awake to hear the other couple playing – that would have for sure been so hot. In the dark, just hearing them – unplanned – that kind of situation, I would feel safe with.
Being unplanned, I know it is not an attempt to swing. If the perfect scenario just happened – 2 couples fucking – unplanned…that would be hot. Could my mind be fantasizing naughty things at those moments? Yes. But each husband's cum would land only on or in his wife. Planning it openly with a couple? Super high risk. There are likely couples who have such a known and detailed friendship, with known convictions andboundaries – that they could pull it off. That would be a rare friendship I think.
I’m thinking you’ve articulated well what Vanessa means when she says she wouldn’t want to plan something like this, but that she’d be open to it happening if it was around someone she knew and trusted. That makes sense. She once begged me to take her on an “adults only” camping trip with one of her sisters and her sister’s husband. I could have totally seen something like that happening on that trip, and Vanessa being ok with it. For what it’s worth, we weren’t able to make the trip.
Camping might also be a situation where I could see it happening naturally. Either in separate tents or a large one. Possibly an RV
Some Scripture, directly or indirectly applicable, comes to mind:
Keep every thought captive-
Husbands, love your wives-
He must increase, I must decrease-
Do not cause another to stumble-
“I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine”
Something to consider:)
Thanks for the advice!
I am actually for same room sex. I find it in the same category as masturbation, in the Bible. Nothing is said about it. There is no instruction for, or against. I see it as a liberty. Won't judge if ever I find out someone has done it.
Done in respect to God it can be very respectful & down right naughty fun.
Yet, as with every other freedom we may have in Christ, we must be careful to not cause other members of the church to sin/fall away, & we have to conduct ourselves in our marriages as true husbands & wives, first. Meaning, sacrifice (don't do it) this for your spouse, if they are not into it, or show signs of not actually addressing what it would take to live through it with no regrets, or going against conscience.
My wife & I, early in our marriage, before church life, did this twice, with 2 different couples. There, quite possibly, could've been a 3rd, & 4th, couple. But, the friendships parted ways. None of us keep in touch anymore, on amicable terms. If ever we see each other out & about we catch up, nothing awkward.
On my part, my wife's, & as far as I could tell, the other couple's, there was never any temptation to swing or swap. That's not to say had we continued the practice a temptation would not have developed. But, it very well could not have, too. I do think, now, that one wife might've been interested in me, had it ever become a notion, but it never did. Just a slight feeling, nothing real.
I see that a major resolve & mutual likemindedness would be needed to keep this in real boundaries. It doesn't have to happen, but as couples get more familiar over time, resolve could shift, & temptation could develop to push & change the ordinary.
The 2 couples I mentioned ended up divorcing years later, for other things. One couple, the wife was very conservative, covering herself when walking through the room. But, by the time they divorced she was having an affair, & asking us if we wanted to go out partying.
The other couple, the wife was not a church going girl. The rest of us grew up in church, but were not attending. She never had that. By the time they divorced, she had an affair, & went gay later. This is the one that possibly would've strayed had there been an opening.
My wife & I had a separation, but never divorced, glory to God. Yet, as I have said on MH before, my wife I have differences that are near impossible to unite sometimes. I say these things because I think the same room sex had no bearing on how the marriages ended up, but I really cannot say it didn't. Husbands & wives are different. Riding high on the good times is not a clue to gladly jump into uncharted territory. Things like this can change things, but don't have to. But, if there is a fundamental difference in the 2 of you, it will show up, at times like this. And, it could be bad. Even if you can't pin it on the same room sex, it will be there as a reason you will never be able to shake, if things go south.
On occasion, I have asked my wife about these times. Early on, she liked it. Said it was pretty intense. Later on, asking about them, her story changed to, there was alcohol involved. Of which, I would say not enough to keep anyone from driving home that night.
We grow different. As marriages progress, we change. Sex changes. Desires change. Maybe, the real person comes out. I still would do same room sex, but I cannot say the same for my wife. Yet, we grew up in a different era. We were much more moralistic sexually speaking, as a a culture. People today may expect, & accept, more sexual sin as ok, today. Making this topic easier to jump in & out of, than it was for us.
Why it happened was because we husbands had really great friendships. We knew each other & were like each other in different ways. Plus, we weren't offensive to the other's wife. We played cards, had dinners, watched movies. So, naturally, sex comes up. Nothing repulsive, but we openly discussed, & joked, about sex. Eventually, strip poker came up. This was never anything we ever thought would happen, but we all ended up on the living room floor fucking our wives right where we all could see. No clothes on. No blankets. Just 4 naked people watching cocks go in & out of pussies. It was nice. I enjoyed it. Heck, we all did.
Technically, it's not a sin, if you keep it under control. But, think it through. If there is any hint of negative doubt, don't do it. If there is any chance your spouse will see you, or themselves, as lesser because if it, don't do it. Fantasies have a way of turning into a bad reality, real quick.
“Fantasies have a way of turning into a bad reality, real quick.”
A really profound statement right there!
“If there is any chance your spouse will see you, or themselves, as lesser because if it, don't do it.”
This is something else I liked that I want to be extremely vulnerable about and expound upon.
Regarding this fantasy- I could probably make it happen if I really wanted to. I could probably call in the chips, favors with friends, whatever. I could probably set it up in just such a situation that Vanessa would be overcome by the heat of the environment and be down for it, in the moment, so to speak.
However, I must admit, that our marriage began as a friendship. I was not exactly her physical ideal, and while I was immediately impressed by certain aspects of her physique, she is also a taller and heavier woman than I usually felt interested in.
I also know she’s had past love interests and at least one relationship that was solely based on a very intense sexual attraction.
Would same room sex, around the “right” (or wrong?) people potentially stir up old memories for her? I know she’s been in that sort of environment (same-room sex) in her past before we met.
Though I never have, would I get too turned on by a woman whose body is the athletic, lithe type of femininity I used to idolize as a young man, but have never experienced?
Honestly, I’d probably say no, because of how much I’ve come to love, appreciate, and desire my wife for who she is.
I’d also like to think even given a second chance with former love interests (or men similar to them), that she’d choose me as well.
I think she would.
But should we take that risk?
As I’ve posted before, to put it politely, my best looks are when my shirt comes off, not when my underwear comes off. What if the other guy in the room is packing? I might feel bad like I am not good enough. After all, I’m not the only man she’s seen, what if she starts thinking of stuff she’s seen in the past? Maybe how much better it felt, looked, tasted… etc.
So it could damage my self esteem I think.
Beyond that, I’ve never been interested in the idea of seeing my wife with another man. But fooling around with another woman? I am vehemently opposed to such behaviors as sin, but I could see the enemy tempting me with that.
Any situation like this has so many variables.
If it ever happened, and went well, I’d probably view it as pulling off some sort of dangerous stunt and coming through unscathed. I don’t think it would be something I’d feel safe and relaxed about until it was over.
In fact, the more I think about it, even though I don’t see it as explicitly being sinful, only an area where so much can go wrong, I still find myself often turned off from the idea just because of how MUCH could go wrong…
But that’s just a tired, somewhat cynical man in his late 30s who has experienced a lot of difficult times. It could be a completely different situation for other men reading this, and if it could go well, I hope it goes well for them.
At any rate, thanks for such a thought provoking discussion!
Thanks to you both! It’s great advice and helps me think about the situation from a different perspective than I had before!
This is something I would very much like to do. I think it would be a spiritual experience, to witness this holy act between another married couple. And it would be a real turn-on.
I don't think I would be tempted to swap. My wife is stunning, and we have never been with anyone else. I have no desire whatsoever to see my wife with another man. I am insanely jealous of her sexuality. The rules would be pretty simple. No touching, no alcohol.
It will probably never happen. Wife would not agree to it, and I don’t know any other couple who would be interested. Even if wife wanted to and we knew another couple with similar values (a committment to monogamy) who was willing, I would be very hesitant to go thru with it. We would be in uncharted territory. I would hate it if things got weird between us, especially if they were long-time friends. Even if we agreed it was scripturally permissable, that doesn't mean that someone wouldn't feel guilty about it afterwards.
If Wife ever genuinely wanted to do it, I would probably try to find another couple online rather than risk an existing friendship. And that would be difficult. I can't imagine that discussion getting very far on say The Marriage Bed forum.
Thanks for weighing in!
I have had intimacy with another couple in the room in my early days which was really fun but naughty at the same time. My partner went against the catholic rules by touching and playing with the other females breast however I didn't go near them.
I have suggested the same with my wife except no touching however she won't.
I didn't belong to the religious faith until I was 39 so I have done lots of things against the faith rules early in my life.
Thanks for contributing! I’ve heard a lot of stories on here about couples or individuals who did things early in life that they now regret. Or look back on with longing; depending on the experience.
This is a fascinating topic I've thought about myself at times. Usually I consider the history of it: many people over the centuries were living in close quarters and had little privacy; children could possibly hear their parents having sex, or multiple couples might have lived together depending on a family's size and who had gotten married. Not to mention settings like traveling on wagon trains or living outdoors. Sex is a natural part of life and it shouldn't be taboo to know other couples are doing it. Unfortunately, centuries of church tradition and now a Westernized, Americanized Christianity has contributed to our views of sex being so convoluted. If I was married and with another couple, say in a hotel room, it seems to me that it would be so natural if they began to get intimate; I'd be so happy that they were enjoying and loving each other, and I'd be doubly happy to have my own man on whom to pour out my arousal and desire. I'd be turned on by the sexy views of the other couple making love, but so focused on my husband that I'd never think of going to play with the other guy. This is based off of how well I know myself. But who knows? Maybe in the moment I'd feel so shy and awkward and start laughing hysterically! 🤣
Curious which aspects of Western Christianity do you think have had a negative affect on Christian Sexuality? I’m not trying to be argumentative or debate, I just enjoy reading your thoughts and am curious what you mean.
Also, do you think Eastern Christianity (Russian Orthodox, Egyptian Coptic, Ethiopian Orthodox) handles it better than the Western (Catholic & Protestant) Churches?
Personally, I think the Church may be less to blame as industrialized culture. Just my own personal opinion.
I think many people in the industrialized world have become so unaccustomed to real life.
We are not used to being around the sick, the dying, others who are using the bathroom, or other normal people who are having sex (not counting porn or other “streamlined” sexual displays, but real life).
We have become very insulated to the more messy or unpleasant aspects of life.
LLL – thank you so much for the comment! I always enjoy your stories and comments – it’s an honor to have you comment on my post.
I agree with you. The church I grew up in was very conservative and sexual things were not normalized (or even normal relationships between the opposite sex).
NorthernSky – I’ve really enjoyed your input on this subject. I think it’s industrialized western culture as well. We feel so disconnected with other human beings in general that it takes diligent work to reprogram oneself in a way that aligns with nature.
LLL,
Once again, you and I think a lot alike.
I admire that you put so much caring thought into your answers — even when the topic is really HOT, as this one is.
A close parallel fantasy of mine is to be the video cameraman for a married couple that wants to be able to watch themselves on the screen later (or even during!).
What would I get out of it? Some great memories! Or, maybe even a copy of the video, if they don't mind.
NorthernSky, thanks for the question. It's the mindset that comes from some early church fathers who said things like "sex is a necessary evil" and "it's only for procreation" which has escalated into a lack of knowledge or positive thinking in many Christian circles in the West. Especially in very conservative, fundamentalist sects, sex is almost taboo. I've said before that I didn't learn about sex until I was 19. It was this awkward thing that my mom was very uncomfortable talking about. I've heard very few Christians talk about sex and marriage in the light of Song of Solomon, which is why this site is so encouraging to me. I don't know about Eastern Christian sects or how they view it, but I'd be interested in looking it up.
Is your experience in the church or in Christian circles different?
@LLL,
Well, I went to a church that had a lot of people from very rough backgrounds (drug abuse, sexual abuse, sexual sin of various kinds) so they didn’t really shy away from those topics. I was more unhappy in the sense I don’t feel I was prepared by anyone for how challenging the beginning of marriage could be for a man losing his virginity at a later age than normal (body not cooperating, etc.)
But anyway, I guess every situation and church has a different style. But I was told about marriage and sex at age 7, so at least the basics were never really hidden or mysterious. It was more what sex would actually be like, and I don’t think any of the talks I got or the dabbling in porn did anything to prepare me for the way it would feel to be with another person in real life. I always thought it would be 100% adrenaline and excitement, but found it was also a lot of awkwardness and sweetness and embarrassment, and I don’t feel I had been prepared for that.
@LLL – I really tried to capture the awkwardness in my story, “The Big Reveal”. I’d really like to think it will help others in my shoes who might lose their virginity a bit later.
I’ve been told by people who lost it younger (late teens and early twenties, which is actually historically more a “normal” age) that the experience is a lot more intense because hormone levels are higher, and emotionally there are less inhibitions and apprehensions. I think us slightly older folks tend to have more of that, plus I am a very self-conscious, paranoid person by nature. 😆
Anyway, I’d like to think my writing will help prepare others in the ways I don’t think I was.
Thanks for sharing, NorthernSky! We got married relatively young and experienced each other a little bit before marriage. Definitely a benefit being able to use the fires of youth toward an early relationship!
@LovingFun
Heheh, yep, I’m definitely an older guy pushing my forties, but I’ve had a rough life in some ways, and I got a later start with the sex than most.
Take it from me and count yourself blessed you got married young.. enjoy the extra energy and hormones while you have them! Invest all you can into your wife so that you can have wonderful memories to build off of as you enjoy the beautiful journey of life! And welcome to the site by the way. Looking forward to more posts from you! 😊
Thanks, NorthernSky!
I’m actually not new to the site at all – been on here for over 3 years at this point. Just the first time I’ve ever contributed in a post!
Looking forward to it!
TurnedOn47 – I’ve also fantasized about being a camera man for the friend couple I mentioned in the post. I know they regularly video themselves based on our conversations, so I admit I’ve thought about that content quite a lot. They have quite a library at this point!
My ex gf was all for it at one time, both with another female and or a couple. we searched high and low and when we found the right female, her "feelings" got in the way thinking I would enjoy the other female more. But then we found a couple, actually her friends, and this time she was all for it. I knew hubby had eyes for my girl for a long time too lol…..she did enjoy it a lot more with friends rather than a stranger. so maybe friends are better?
Thanks for sharing! I definitely know that the guy in the friend couple I mentioned has eyes for my wife – he hasn’t said so much, but I can definitely tell. And I’ve always had a soft spot for his wife as well. I think we’d only consider them as a pairing. I don’t think we’d for a for total stranger. I brought it up with my wife and she said she wasn’t sure about the idea. I think I could work on her though 😉
I think she also has a soft spot for the wife, so it wouldn’t take that much convincing!
We don’t think it is wrong and we couldn’t wait to find the right couple. Feeding off each other’s energy was great. We all are a bit of voyeurs which helped too. My only caution is pick the right couple and discuss it carefully. Set boundaries about cross touching.
SecondMarge, having one close married friend watching us helped easing into it. We made it look like accidental. She appreciated the hot scene and talked her husband into it. Having it as a fantasy first and using the sex machine was the first step..
Hey SecondMarge and hotwifey78!
Thanks for sharing your experiences! They’re really helping us feel less alone in this fantasy.
SecondMarge, how did you find the “right couple” and set boundaries? Any tips for those early conversations to keep it from getting awkward?
Hotwifey78, love the “accidental” approach! How did you pull that off, and what was it like when your friend caught on? Also, curious about the “sex machine” – how did it help ease into things?
We’re eager to explore this but want to keep our friendship solid. More details on how you navigated this and the aftermath would be awesome. Thanks! 😊
Cindy and Cal here both.
We do have same room sex with another couple. We went to Jamaica with them this summer (adults only type of trip). They’re believers too. My advice would be keep it spicy but boundaries clear. Monogamy is key. But there’s no reason not to enjoy sex with our spouse while friends get off too. And yes we engage with our friends, not sexually, but visually and definitely verbally.
It should also be said if this is going to cause you or the other couple to stumble maybe don’t watch your befriend stroke her husband’s cock while you ride your husband
Cindy & Cal,
Since you have experience with being with another like-minded couple recently – may I ask you to elaborate a bit on some details?
It has to do with how the four of you safeguard yourselves from stumbling into sin.
1) What is your explicit rules that you all have talked through and agreed to in advance?
2) From the start of your friendship, how long did it take for you guys to get to sexy conversations – then to raising the subject of engaging in things in each other's company?
3) Did the wives or husbands prompt the earliest in-depth discussions? Or was it organically all four together talking?
4) How close does one couple get to the other couple as they are watching? Really close or on the other side of the room?
5) You said you all talk while it is going on – what kinds of things are said? Is it like cheering on? Is it directing things to do?
6) Certainly things can and do go wrong – we still sin. What are the things you have done that got close to going sideways – if any?
7) What does the spiritual dynamic of your friendship look like with this couple? Do you guys talk about Scripture and pray together too? Or does sex alone seem to be the biggest part since being this open?
7) How would you describe your mind's attraction to his wife (Cal) or to her husband (Cindy)?
8) How much do they enter into your masturbation thoughts – both of you?
9) If you were writing a how-to manual about how to do this right and godly – what would your three main pillars of advice be?
10) After all four of you have cum – the room is smelling like sex. You are all naked and catching your collective breath. Describe what it looks like. Do you lay there talking? Do you just start taking turns using the bathroom. Is it quiet? After cleanup and ready for sleep. Lights are out. Do you continue talking again? Does it lead to another round? Anything you can say about that post-cum atmosphere?
11) Next morning? Sex dominated? Or get up and get on with sightseeing?
Thank you so much for thoughtfully considering my questions.
You have gone where so few have. I wish you two nothing but the best.
LH
Hi Bee (Cindy & Cal),
Just hoping you might see my questions for you still on "Same Room Sex Fantasy"
They got buried in the queue the day I sent them.
LH
Hey. Sorry I didn’t see this. A friend, I know off site, told me about it.
This is Cindy btw. I think I know Cal’s answers were applicable.
1. Explicit rule is no sex outside of marriage.
2. Actually shortly after we started attending their Bible study it was brought up, her and I actually discussed it before Cal ever even met her husband.
3. Wives. The other wife brought it up to me after talking about it with her husband. I roleplayed her for Cal a few times. Then after the guys officially meet, her and I got touchy drinking wine and we said we should just go at it. He wasn’t about it at first given our past, but, well it’s a long wild story. BTW if you read my first story on here, I very much on purpose didn’t give accurate timelines, I was worried about people discovering who we are.
4. Often times we’re in the same bed or on their couch. We’re close.
5. Yes to both. “Bounce on that cock!” Is something commonly heard. Honestly her and I are more chatty, which both our guys one on one are super talkative but not in that setting. It’s the girls getting dirty with our talk.
6. Well, okay. I don’t know how much to say, we’ve swapped cum and made out.
7. I think the most attraction is her to Cal. And second most would be me to her. Honestly if it wasn’t for Cal, I would have let them have sex once. They’re both hot. I’m over that now, truly I don’t want to see Cal in her.
8. Rare.
9. I know Cal’s answer. First, don’t covet who isn’t yours. Second, husbands hands don’t wander to the other wife and wife’s hands don’t wander to the other husband. Third, have fun. (Sometimes we try and see who can get off faster etc).
10. I love being covered in cum. And I don’t mind them seeing me a mess. Cal gets shorts on quick. And we usually don’t sleep in the same room. It’s happened but not the norm, we just have sex when we hang out, or sometimes we play Scrabble.
11. Depends
Loving Fun! Sorry for the late answer! By accidental I meant having a female friend of mine over when her husband was on travel. We were loud intentionally and she showed up at door and watched us. We let her watch almost every time we fucked for a month or so. Me and her always discussed the scene the next day. Sex machine, the ceiling to floor mirror reflecting me with the machine and husband. We give our reflections names and imagined they were other ppl. We also used loud sound effect. Hope u find the right couple and enjoy loving your wife in their presence. Doing it on the same bed is an out of this world experience.
Thanks so much for the reply! We have the fantasy of same-room or same-bed sex with our close friend couple. Can’t wait to see it come true someday! I know they’d likely be into it, or at least have the same fantasy. I often also have a fantasy of my wife being gone for work and staying at their house – possibly being invited in to watch. It’s a common sex fantasy that I entertain! Very similar to the situation with your friend. Thanks for the inspiration!