A Second Wedding Night

Garrett is not my first husband. My first husband’a name was John. He died on March 16, 2009. We were married for 9 years before the cancer and 11 years when he died. He had a rare kind of brain cancer. I watched him go through the terrible symptoms of Chemo Therapy. If I could, I would have taken the pain from him and put it on myself. Watching the man you love slip away and not be able to stop it is indescribable. He was 30 when he passed. I was 29. We did not have any kids. We had gotten married very young despite the objections our parents had. We loved each other and wanted to be together forever. He was and is the love of my life. I will not describe my wedding night with John because it is too painful to remember.

I met Garrett 3 years later. (I went through a deep depression for two years and then started getting better through therapy.) we fell in love. I had not dated or had sex with a man since John’s death.

I felt a little guilty after signing the marriage papers to Garrett (we didn’t have a ceremony). I felt like I was cheating on John. Is this what John would have wanted? Before John got sick, he used to tell me that he wouldn’t mind if I got married again if something happened to him. He said he wanted me to be happy. But still, I felt guilty.

It was Garrett and my wedding night. We were at my place. Garrett was not a virgin. But I wanted to wait. He also knew that I was a widow. We both knew what we were doing in regards to sex. I was in the restroom looking at John’s wedding ring I took with me everywhere. I told myself that this is what John wanted. I put his ring in a small velvet bag I always did.

I walked out of the restroom and I see Garrett in nothing but briefs. His beautiful body was all mine to enjoy. I was so in awe of him, I had forgotten my dilemma. I wanted him and by the look on his face, he wanted me. I took off my clothes except my panties and bra. I walked to Garrett and kissed his lips lightly. With each kiss, our passion got hotter and hotter. There was a hunger deep in my stomach that I hadn’t felt in a long time. The feeling was almost too overwhelming. I wrapped my arms around his body and kissed down his jawline to his neck. I took in his smell. Oh, the wonderful scent of man! I had forgotten the sweet scent. Enough to drive you wild with desire. I wanted him. No! I craved him. I needed him.

The feeling of his skin on my hands. Rough and soft at the same time. We fell in into bed kissing vigorously. My head was getting dizzy and my skin getting goose bumps. The sensation of feelings that had been sleeping and were being awakened once again. I looked down and saw his erection straining against his briefs. It felt good to know that I was the cause of his arousal. My clitoris was tingling and filling with blood. I made my way on top and took off my bra. He sat up and sucked on my left nipple.

“Ah,” I sighed contentedly. I leaned him down and we kissed more. I made my way to his neck again.

“I want you,” I whispered in his ear. I unstraddled and took off my panties. He took off his briefs. He was gorgeous. His cock was perfect, his legs were perfect. Everything about him was and is perfect.

I quickly straddled him again and guided his cock into my throbbing womanhood. It was a little painful at first. I hadn’t had sex in 5 years. But the pain soon subsided. I moved back and forth slowly. As we got into a set rhythm, my thrusts became more desperate. I leaned forward and kissed him while moving my hips. I grabbed the head board as I shook the bed against the wall.

“Yeah!” I growled. It felt great to be connected with a man this way again. Not just any man, but one that I loved. I could feel tears gathering in my eyes. I held them back because I knew that if I cried, Garrett would stop. I could feel my orgasm building, but I didn’t want it to end. So I got off of him and started to suck his dick until my build up subsided. As I sucked, he moaned in pleasure. I love making my husband groan. Watching him happy makes me happy. Once I felt I could handle more penetration, I went back to my original position. I thrusted vigorously back and forth, up and down. The air became humid from the heat and sweat radiating from our bodies. I looked at his chest, arms, and stomach. I wanted to kiss every inch of his body. I stopped moving my hips and sucked on his nipples. I got rewarded with a groan. I kissed and licked his chest. I did the same with his muscular arms. I couldn’t get enough of him. I wanted everything. I was hungry for him. My heart pounded in my chest as I started to move my hips again.

“Mm-mm,” I groaned. Grabbing the head board again, I rocked back and forth harder as I felt a familiar build up. Garrett lifted up his hips and pounded into me over and over again. A couple more thrusts of his hips…

“Oh, yeah! I gonna cum!” He growled. I felt his cock pulse and spurt his seed into me.

The moment I felt his semen shoot, I lost control. I felt my own release and then immediate ecstasy. All the years of pent up sexual tension had been released in what I can only call an explosion. I have to say that it was the most overwhelming orgasm I have had to date. It seemed to last forever. As I came back to earth, my body shook. I fell to the side of the bed and tried to catch my breath.

“Wow,” Garrett said. “That was quite something.”

“You have no idea,” I said breathlessly. We cuddled up together. After an hour, Garrett fell asleep. I looked at him. I knew I would never hurt him. I would be there in the good times and bad. I will never forget John. There have been days where I miss him terribly. But I have been blessed with a husband that does not get jealous. Garrett lets me mourn and leaves me alone when I’m feeling sad. But he never holds it against me. I am sad to say that Garrett will never occupy the spot in my heart I have for John. But I love him all the same.

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11 replies
  1. Lovinghusband says:

    Dear Ah, I want to thank you for having the love and courage to share such painful (and wonderful) thoughts and experiences. You touched my heart more deeply than you could know.

    I nearly died of cancer 10 years ago. There were many times (especially at its worst) when I told my wife that I would want her to marry again if I did not make it. I remember those moments like it was yesterday! I did not want her or my kids to be alone. Yet, God had plans for me to live on – and we rejoice in that. But, with EVERY fiber of my being – had the Lord’s will been to take me then – I can assuredly tell you that I would have rejoiced to know my wife was with a man that loved the Lord and His Word. I would have wanted their intimacy to be full and joyous! I knew God could give her that grace!

    I don’t want to be presumptuous – but I believe John would not have it any other way. Rejoice in the Lord and enjoy all the blessings God has for you and Garrett. There is nothing second class or second best for the life you two share together now! I rejoice with you for the hard trials God has brought you through! I trust that God will continue to help you say ‘Ah’ with contentment – as you and Garrett enjoy the hot oneness that God has designed for you! God bless you!!

  2. Anonymous says:

    Thank you Lovinghusband for your encouraging words. I am happy for you and your family that your life was spared. You have been truly blessed by God. I don’t think you are being presumptuous. I do think that this is what John would have wanted. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

  3. wanted always says:

    Your story, which you are still living, touched my heart and I”m a guy. I’ve told my wife of 35 years the same thing, that her heart is big enough to love another should God call me home. I also know that I will always love my wife and the joy and sex we have and will have together. Hold Garret and know John is A OK with it. I bet he rejoices that you were given another by God.

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