Double or Multiple Orgasms

Multiple Orgasms?

I want to query the MH community members: Please tell me if I'm off base. For a woman who has not experienced multiple orgasms, I would think a few things need to happen first in order to have them.

First, she would need to be comfortable in her own skin and not self-conscious.

Next is high arousal. A woman would, I believe, need to be comfortable, relaxed, and "into" it. She needs to be able to trust her husband completely.

Here's what I think is the final ingredient (and probably the most important). The woman's brain, thought processes, and beliefs need to be arranged in such a way that allows her body to respond. She needs to believe a multiple orgasm is possible — no distractions, no worries, etc.

For those out there who learned how to have double orgasms (or more), can you please describe how that happened for you? What needed to take place to get you there? What roadblocks did you have to remove? Did you go from disbelieving to belief? And once it started happening for you, what other doors opened for you sexually (e.g., different techniques, positions, squirting, etc...)?

4.89 avg. rating (95% score) - 9 votes
14 replies
  1. iwantiteveryday says:

    Ladies, PLEASE give us your input on this great topic by HeSaid-SheSaid.

    I would greatly appreciate it as I have been trying to encourage my wife to experience these so-called delicious orgasms!!

    Ladies, please provide DETAILED Feedback.

  2. Soulmates4652 says:

    Speaking for my wife...we find she is able to have multiple orgasms after a long period of no sex (which for us is 1 week or more) We do incorporate the use of a Magic wand, but only after some foreplay to get her aroused. I know she is ready when I feel her G-spot swelled and she responds like crazy to my "come hither" fingering. I will also have her stroke my cock while I am fingering her or will masturbate for her while doing her. Really gets her going. ANYWAY when fingering her gets her squirming, she's ready for the magic wand. After her first WOW orgasm, she is ready to go for more. Typically I will enter her and when I start rocking her, she can come just by penetration alone but just for fun sometimes we use the wand also. That sensation of the vibrator and her sweetness clamping down and sucking on me while we both cum is awesome! She can come several times this way, while I'm still inside her. Our rule for most pleasure is "she comes first", and sometimes second and third.

  3. Southernheat says:

    I went from working at having one orgasm to having more than I can count at times!!!
    For most of my years, arousal was not the problem - until the beginning of menopause (as you can read in my recent story.) My problem was my brain and not being totally in the moment. I was trying to work at it to make it happen and worrying more about pleasuring my spouse, being self-conscious, and not totally explaining and showing him what I needed. Masturbation helped me learn better and quicker ways to orgasm so it was not so much effort. Communication, showing and explaining to my spouse what I needed, was necessary. And it helped when he didn't get his feelings hurt and take it that he was doing something wrong, as he did when we were younger. My husband came to realize that sometimes intercourse is not going to be all I need and that’s ok. Fingers, tongues, toys, and cock: sometimes I even need all of them. And the number one thing was my self-esteem and forgetting what I look like and realizing I’m worth it and then just letting go and enjoying every moment staying in the moment. Wow, it’s so great now. We totally understand each other and things are just fun.

    • HeSaid-SheSaid says:

      Wow, I think this reply deserves 5 stars. Thank you Southernheat for your input, I'm sure this will help many.

  4. lttlb says:

    Hi HeSaid-SheSaid,

    Your list of 'things that need to happen first' seems accurate. I don't know that all of them are required in every situation, but they certainly would help. It's not something I've ever wondered about really, so I'll be curious what others say also.

    For us, it's simply been a given from the get-go that she is multi-orgasmic. Honestly, I don't know what makes the difference. Maybe it's some of the things on your list. Maybe it's the fact that both of us when we got married were so naive we didn't know any better. I was her first, she was my first, and neither of us had ever even dated another person in our life. Don't know if that has anything to do with it or not. Or maybe it's just purely luck, or how God designed her? I really don't know. I've never seen myself as a 'good lover' by any stretch of the imagination, so I'd rule out my own efforts; this is all her. But I have no doubt there are men out there who are extraordinary in terms of being lovers, and that might make a huge difference for other couples.

    What I DO know, is how much of a treat and blessing it is to her husband, that she is this way. 😉

    • HeSaid-SheSaid says:

      lttlb, my wife and I are very similar to you and yours, my wife had a few boyfriends in high school, but nothing serious, and she was my first in everything. However, my wife had a negative image about both male and female genitals among other preconceived notions regarding sex. Needless to say our sex life has had challenges over the years. We've been married 25 years now and are working on making positive changes for both her and myself, especially in beliefs regarding sex, and I believe we owe MH some thanks for that.

      She was able to masturbate the other day using a new sex "tool" and bring herself to 3 orgasms. During an interlude a day or two later with me, she thinks she may have had several "mini" orgasms using the same "tool". She has nothing really to compare it to so she wasn't sure exactly what was happening, however she felt she was on the verge of a much bigger O at the same time, however we ran out of time as I had to leave for work. This would not have been possible or even desirable for her even a year ago. Praise God for His blessed gift of marital sex!!!

  5. Southernheat says:

    Early years, single orgasm was the goal very seldom were there multiple.
    Yes, your Brain is the most important thing. Also communication and not being self-conscious or embarrassed.
    Masturbation helps you learn the best techniques for yourself so you can better communicate and show your spouse what you need. Then learn to not focus so much on making it happen as just having fun and enjoying the moment. I had to learn it’s ok to focus on myself As well as what makes him happy. He’s happy if I’m happy! The more I let go and get into it the more he enjoys as well. Now after all these years, it just happens so easy.

  6. ClimaXX says:

    I find it very interesting that up to now no person has responded to the BRILLIANT questions above. but let us be honest, this is a dangerous area to try and give advice.
    Being a man, disqualifies me 100% to even try and answer this question, but having a super-multi-orgasmic wife puts me back in the arena. I do not have advice, but want to share my thoughts about how my wife manages 10 or 15 orgasms.
    1. She wants to have orgasm and plenty of them. (The key word is WANT)
    2. I love making her cum and will spend as much time as she would allow me to make love to her.
    3. I will keep on helping her to another and another and another orgasm until she says "NO MORE!"
    4. We have toys. (Maybe that should have been point #1) We have many toys and we use them. I have just ordered a new one and hope to give some feedback on it soon.
    5. She knows her own body and is not ashamed to take part in reaching orgasm. Sometimes I am just NOT fast enough with what I do and she will take over and go for the jackpot.
    6. Often we will just use the toys (her favorite is a Lelo Swan and when using it she can reach her first Big O in less than 2 minutes.)
    But.... her emotional position is of paramount importance. She is a woman! And that says so much! She is not an Orgasm Machine that just has orgasms because I said so. She needs to be loved and cherished every day. And that has more value to her than all the orgasms in the world.

    • HeSaid-SheSaid says:

      Thanks ClimaXX for mentioning the emotional component, I can't believe I forgot to mention that as that would be a HUGE part of participating and enjoying and engaging with sex.

      Maybe another way to look at my post is to answer in the opposite. "What prevents a woman from multiple or even single orgasm, or even the enjoyment and desire of sex at all??"

      Anyways, thanks again and God bless.

  7. SecondMarge says:

    I guess I’m missing out. Closest I come is a second orgasm during the same love making session. Once while by myself with a vibrator I orgasmed then thought I was going to cum again but passed out from the intensity. My husband wants me to experience it more than I do.

    • HeSaid-SheSaid says:

      Wow, never heard of anyone passing out due to intense sexual excitement. Not sure if that's something to be proud of, or worried about, lol.

      I believe every woman is capable of having multiples, but for some it just happens a whole lot easier, or it is something a woman has to teach herself to experience. Maybe it's like many other things in life. Taking driving for example. Some people pick it up right away and pass the drivers exam first try. Others take a long time, need extra coaching, and end up challenging the exam several times before they pass. I also believe every woman is capable of squirting, but in my mind, that is like an advanced level kind of thing. But I could be wrong about that too, maybe some women are natural squirters. Is this true for any of you reading this?

    • SecondMarge says:

      Squirting? I thought that was porn fiction. How does one learn to have multiples? I get very over sensitive and don’t want any more. Pass out momentarily just long enough to know I was unaware for a few moments.

      Are multiples all the same intensity? Or is it several small orgasms before the one big one?

Leave a Reply

Want to join the discussion?
Feel free to contribute!

Leave a Reply