Sex. Society sees sex in one of two ways. Shameful or you must have sex with a lot of people to know what you like. Many times, parents and churches teach that sex is a dirty secret or something to be ashamed of.
I want to say that sex is beautiful! It’s healthy. It’s love. It’s two people together as one. However, only within marriage. See, my parents taught us about sex and God. God created sex, so sex is good but only within marriage. I remember as a little girl I accidentally walked in on my parents doing the deed. Yikes.
So many parents would yell and shame their child. However, my parents didn’t do this. Instead, they both sat down and had a talk with me. They told me since they were married, sex was healthy and part of being married. God wanted them to have sex. Sex is a thing married couples do. God has a purpose for marriage and the family. Genesis 1:28. Marriage between a husband and wife is a good thing. Children are a blessing from God and are created via sexual intercourse – also a blessing from God. I was created by sex, two becoming one. We all were.
There is a special bond married couples share. Physical bonding is important. It’s a way to show love, respect, and share each other. Kissing, touching, sex are all healthy within marriage. God wants married couples to do this. They want my parents to do this. It was uncomfortable hearing this as a kid, but it’s important to know. This carries on to your adult years. I was told at the time that one day I might have a husband and I too will enter the bounds of marriage. I too will one day share a special gift with my husband. It’s normal and healthy, but sex is private between husband and wife. So next time I should knock and understand privacy. Parents need privacy too.
I don’t remember how old I was at the time. Maybe 10 or 11 years old. I do know the next year I decided to give my life and purity to the Lord. This conversation stuck with me. Even on my wedding day and even now. The conversation my parents had with me was an important one. I remember hearing so many of my own friends have trouble liking sex or having sex because their own parents or churches treated sex as a bad dirty thing. So many parents and churches treat sex as a dirty bad thing. Parents even shame their children for seeing something natural and something God wants. Sex is loving.
Was it gross catching my mom and dad in the act? Yes. I was mortified. However, my parents taught me sex is what married people do. It’s what parents do. They love each other and sex is a gift you give your spouse. It taught me to have a healthy view of sex. Now that I’m married and I’m having sex, I’m happy my parents taught me this healthy way to look at sex. I hope one day to pass this knowledge on to my own children. I hope they never ever catch us in the act but if they do, I’ll explain to them the same way my parents explained it to me.
Yes, parents, it’s embarrassing for your kid to catch you in the act. But sex isn’t shameful. It’s beautiful. It’s healthy. Parents have sex because they love each other and it’s healthy. Kids need to hear and see this. Not you having sex but knowing sex isn’t dirty or bad. Yes, parents have sex because you love each other and God tells us sex within marriage is ok.
So next time your child catches you or might catch you don’t panic. Treat sex as something beautiful within the bonds of marriage. Talk with your child. A Christian upbringing especially regarding sex is important in this society. My parents kissed in front of us as kids. They still do. It’s a way they show their love. Parents are their child’s first teachers. Teach your children love, respect, and about God.
There’s a special relationship married couples have that their kids need to know about. If you treat sex as a dirty bad thing they’ll see it as a dirty bad thing. When they do get married they might still believe sex is a dirty shameful thing. Don’t set them up for this. Sex is beautiful, it’s wonderful, it’s bonding, it’s God-centered because He created it for us to enjoy within marriage.
Be physical. Yes, physical in front of your children. Not sex but kids needs to see physical affection. My parents would hug and kiss in front of us. I always heard my father tell my mom he loves her before leaving and my mother tell my father she loves him. Being physical teaches kids what a healthy Christian marriage looks like and sets them up for a healthy foundation.
We are sorry that this post was not one of your favorites!
Help us understand why.