The Freedom to Masturbate
In the Apologetic Considerations of Controversial Topics, Bee/Cindy wrote honestly about her and hubby’s sex with her BFF before their salvation experience and her subsequent struggle with missing sex with Jess. She wrote:
Something I now accept is that I can visually admire the feminine frame, but 1) the act of sex with the same sex is what is sinful and 2) any sex outside of marriage is ungodly even if it’s not with another man.
Bee/Cindy then went on to write that she came here to masturbate to hot stories.
Several MHers chimed in with different perspectives and viewpoints on Bee’s/Cindy’s story and journey of struggle. One of the posts from Sarah K caught my attention. She wrote, in part:
I want to applaud you for coming here to find hot stories to masturbate to. That is the positive Christian response a horny girl is to follow.
I agree with Adoniswerewolf and you that girl-girl sex is sinful, and I disagree with those who disagree. I applaud your decision to no longer have threesomes.
As a Christian, I do not see why you could not masturbate together, (sexually touching yourselves, not each other). Sitting side by side with your own hands between your legs reading MH – I don’t see why not. Enjoy.
It’s quite likely (perhaps a certainty!) that most of us have written, read, and reread MH stories for ourselves and/or read MH stories to our spouses and enjoyed the erotic pleasure of jacking or jilling. Many of us share our comments in response to MH stories, and those comments often are so 🔥 that they cause even more jilling and jacking!
It struck me that Sarah K’s last paragraph is honestly expressing the ‘ok-ness’ of masturbating by being stimulated through the erotic, titillating, tantalizing written word of women and men that cause our bodies to surge with sexual desire to self-pleasure and then to peak with orgasmic ecstasy.
Because we embrace the freedom of jacking and jilling, here’s a repeat of my follow-up question that I posted on that thread for further discussion:
As a Christian, is it okay to jill-jill or jack-jill or jack-jack using an App, FT, or texting while sharing/reading MH stories or engaging in other sexy/erotic dialogue?
Harken back to a post by MH (Missy) on this thread. She thanked and encouraged MHers to continue to engage in discussion with respect, honesty, and civility, even in disagreement. Let’s discuss this question in the spirit of grace.
As a Christian, I would say using an App to masturbate with someone that is not your spouse is not good. I only masturbate with my spouse and no one else. I think society accepts women being a bit bisexual and maybe playing with other women more than men playing with men.
Excellent observation, Ron.
I think you're right that as a society we tend to be more accepting of girl-on-girl sexual activity than guy-on-guy. I think that is largely due to guys getting off on the thought of two girls together. I don't think very many women are turned on by the idea of two men together (though, I haven't researched it). I know there is some disagreement about it, but I think both are forbidden in Scripture.
On the other hand, when I was in college I knew of guys who would watch porn together and sometimes jack off to it. I'm totally against porn, but I have a theory that men would be more likely to masturbate in front of each other than women if porn is involved because it gives them something else to focus on other than each other.
Cal here. I was shocked to open this post and see that my wife’s comment inspired such conversation. That’s great!
Dennis Prager, I know he’s not a Christian, but he is Jewish and an Old Testament scholar of sorts. He said something years ago that really resonated with me, so much so that I had a long conversation with Cindy about it. He said most men are naturally polygamists and most women are naturally bisexual, keeping in mind that all people are both fallen with a sin nature. Being born with the inclination to sin does not mean it’s the right thing to do. Anyway the reason I bring up that quote is that when I heard it that was the life we were living, it was around the time we got saved. And yes though at times we miss our past lives-it’s not worth going back to. Keep moving forward.
Cal, thanks for weighing in. Yes, Cindy’s post inspired this Question as well as other MHers comments and experiences. We all appreciate what you and Cindy bring to the MH community. Perhaps your most appreciated comment will regenerate further discussion about:
1) Masturbating with the imagery of the opposite sex or same sex.
2) Masturbating in a closer connection to the person in the sexual scenario. Ergo: sexting, etc.
I rather doubt that many (a few) of MHers would say that masturbating to a MH story or comment is wrong. Most, myself included, have done so and even intentionally often do so by cumming (pun intended) here with the expressed intent to masturbate. Masturbating happens by reading stories of male or female masturbation or one sided sex and orgasm focused on the wife or the husband. From comments, masturbating is not always to the imagery of the opposite sex; it happens with the same sex in mind.
There are even be some MHers that have a very good friend (well trusted) of the opposite sex or same sex that they have mutually masturbated with knowingly and intentionally (not vicariously).
So, why is it ok to masturbate to MH stories and not ok to masturbate with the knowledge and even mutual masturbation in a connected manner?
My opinion is that masturbation with my spouse is 100% godly. We do it as part of our lovemaking sessions every time. We usually have sexual intercourse every 3 days. And on days we don’t have intercourse my wife usually stimulates my nipples as I masturbate to orgasm. Some sex sessions we only masturbate together. Sometimes we masturbate together because medical issues make sexual intercourse impossible… and mutual masturbation is a blessing.
My wife often uses a vibrator – including “fucking” herself with a vibrator or a dildo…. but she still strokes her pussy with her finger and “finger fucks” herself at times and all that is sooooooo sexy to watch!!!
Masturbation with anyone other than each other would feel way out of bounds to our marriage covenant.
We mutually masturbate often too, instead of PIV sex. Wife has an medical issue with PIV sex too. We love to masturbate together though, both of us use toys. We still have some PIV sex, just not often.
Mutual, solo, and watching each other masturbate in the marriage is a powerful sexual bond.
I personally can't imagine ever masturbating in the presence of someone other than my future husband. To me it's just too intimate. I don't have any kind of sexual lure to other women, though I understand that that's fairly common. I do admire the female body, but I'm not attracted to it. Of course, sexual activity of any kind between the same sex is unnatural and immoral, so that's out. As to a woman masturbating with, say, a sister or friend, maybe it could be done in a healthy way, but I never would.
Agree, LLL. It would require a deep level of comfort, respect, trust, and non-sexual connection.
Nice Story. I masturbate daily.
This particularl statement caught my attention.
“It struck me that Sarah K’s last paragraph is honestly expressing the ‘ok-ness’ of masturbating by being stimulated through the erotic, titillating, tantalizing written word of women and men that cause our bodies to surge with sexual desire to self-pleasure and then to peak with orgasmic ecstasy.”
Our MH stories do encourage and assist other persons that are not our spouse to self-pleasure. Few, if any of us, haven’t done so, I believe.
Here are my layered thoughts and opinions on mutual masturbation and/or self-pleasuring between myself and another person not my husband.
1) I fully agree that sex with anyone other than my husband is wrong – another man or another woman.
2) I also believe that physically touching another person as they or both of us are stimulated to an orgasm (at each other’s hand) is wrong.
3) Mutually masturbating in close physical proximity with the opposite sex would be disrespectful to my husband and wrong for me to do.
4) Mutual masturbation in close proximity between two sexual heterogenous women or men is pushing the edge. However, it wouldn’t surprise me if a number of us have done just that with a close friend as a teen or in college.
5) FaceTime, phone sex, or using an app to control a vibrating toy between myself and another man to bring us both to an orgasm would not be okay.
Now here is where the lines blur for me. If we start with the premise that MHers mostly (the majority) agree that it’s okay to masturbate by reading each other’s erotic stories, then here are my layered thoughts and opinions.
1) It’s oka6 to self-pleasure by reading an erotic story written by others – opposite or same sex. What MH does to us!
2) It’s okay to self-pleasure by reading a 🔥 general comment to a story.
3) It’s okay to self-pleasure to a specific response comment on MH. People have actually acknowledged that this happens on MH.
4) It’s okay to self-pleasure and/or to help another person self-pleasure through texting . . . with guardrails.
Although MH has drawn the line on private messaging, I’ve noted that that desired feature has arisen several times in MH comments. It’s clear to me that some MHers would find it okay and comfortable to engage in texting with the opposite sex in order to self-pleasure.
However, guardrails would need to be in place.
1) Both persons must be agreeable.
2) Helping another person learn their bodies – an older woman helping a young woman learn how to explore and stimulate her clit to an O – a man helping a man learn how to edge.
3) It cannot lead to an emotional affair or habitual need.
4) It must not disrespect or supersede the sacredness of each person’s spousal sexual relationship.
5) If either person wants to stop, it stops.
In conclusion, it seems to me that if we are comfortable to self-pleasure to rather personal accounts shared on MH, that very judicious, mature, and non-emotionally connected texting to help and encourage another person to masturbate is certainly on the edge, but not across the boundary.
This is exactly where I was going with my comment, although you laid it out much better and more detailed than I did. I think we are all basically doing this anyways, so to then say texting or messaging with someone for the purposes of arousal and masturbation is wrong would seem hypocritical and inconsistent.
As long as it doesn’t go beyond that, I’m not sure how we could say it’s not okay while also engaging here.
To add to this. Not sure if this is allowed within in the guidelines so if not then my apologies!
But there are places this can be done safely. The Marriage Bed website has a private chat function.
Again apologies if pointing this out isn’t allowed!
Wow! You really thought this through, Livinit! Thanks for weighing-in.
Spicy, thanks for pointing out the importance of self-examination regarding hypocrisy and honesty regarding our self-gratification from sharing erotica vs. texting.
Gotta say I’m not sure I really see a distinction between sexting someone vs. being in here, reading about other people fucking their spouses, and masturbating about it while you do. And then Chatting in the comments about it as well. What’s the definition of sexting such that it is wrong and this here isn’t? It seems one would have to make a commitment one way or other or at least, work to define what constitutes sexting.
That pits a fine point on the question – is interactive texting that far removed from masturbating while being fully aroused by another person’s explicit and detailed erotic sharing in writing?
A technical way of looking at this question is how asynchronous (reading an erotic story) vs. synchronous (interactive texting similar statements or phrases) at that different.
My wife, @thepassionatepastorswife, and I have had some great discussions on this very issue. As we see it (and I'm sure everyone here agrees), there's nothing morally wrong with reading and writing stories about our sexual adventures here on MH. Likewise, we don't see anything wrong with masturbating to those stories and sharing that in the comments section.
When it comes to texting/DMing, we agreed that it's permissible as long it follows the same general principles as MH stories. On MH, we submit stories about our sexual experiences with our own spouse. As readers, we can masturbate while imagining ourselves in those scenarios with our own spouse (or future spouse, in some cases). The point is, on MH, my wife and I don't fantasize about having sex with other people. We just allow their stories to ignite our desire for each other.
Therefore, we decided that it's okay to swap steamy stories via direct message (and masturbate while chatting) as long as it follows the same pattern. The conversation must stay focused on each person's respective spouse. For example, let's say my wife is chatting with someone and that person shares an explicit story about what they did with their own spouse last night. She may respond by describing what she would like to do with me later that day. It's fine for her to get aroused and masturbate while chatting like this. This is just a faster paced, instant response version of MH.
However, we both agreed that it's not acceptable to "sext" with anyone other than each other. That is, we think it's wrong to fantasize about the other person while DMing. If you are chatting with someone and telling that person what you would like to do to them or with them, or you are asking them to touch themselves in certain ways, etc. then your sexual desire is no longer focused on your spouse. Rather, you're lusting after the person you are DMing.
PassionatePastor, your view that masturbating as a result of another person recounting their passion with or for their spouse is very similar to what happens on MH with the readers. A spicy, hot account of spousal sex can make a person horny for their own spouse leading to the need to enjoy self-gratification.
As a Christian, is it okay to jill-jill or jack-jill or jack-jack using an App, FT, or texting while sharing/reading MH stories or engaging in other sexy/erotic dialogue?
I remember reading the post mentioned above as well as the comments, and my initial gut reaction to the above question was "no." However, it really prompted me to study and think about this issue more from a purely Scriptural perspective. That said, God lays out a very specific set of sexual laws in the Pentateuch—there is really not as much gray area as some people make out to be. There are very clear boundaries (Exodus 20, Lev 18, Deut 22): no adultery (coveting/stealing a neighbor's wife), no bestiality, no male homosexuality, no incest, and no rape. Additionally, there is clear reinforcement of these acts as sin in the New Testament:
Fornication (Gk. pornea)—a broad term that encompasses sexual sin in general as laid out by the OT law.
Lasciviousness (Gk. aselgeia)—unrestrained sexual indulgence (like gluttony, but with sex.)
Also, Jesus makes very clear God’s purpose through the OT law when he sums it up in Matthew 22—“Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.” The idea is that the law was a reflection of God’s character and goodness, and it demonstrated how to live in a way that was respectful (loving) of our neighbor.
So, all that to say, there is never any prohibition in Scripture against seeing others naked (even someone other than your spouse.) There is no law against seeing others enjoying themselves sexually. There is no prohibition against writing or discussing sex with others (and the Song of Solomon provides a steamy example of the former!) There is no prohibition against masturbating or having sex within the sight of others. To again provide a concrete list of sinful, inappropriate practices: no adultery (coveting/stealing someone’s wife), no bestiality, no male homosexuality, no incest, and no rape—for all of these things, the OT penalty was execution.
There is a lot of liberty in God’s law. It is much less restrictive of sexual practices than most modern believers are comfortable with. The guiding principle here comes from Romans 14—“But whoever has doubts is condemned if he eats, because the eating is not from faith. For whatever does not proceed from faith is sin.” Have settled in your heart what you know to be right before God—don’t “wing it.” Be able to point to Scripture (in context) to provide evidence for your beliefs and actions.
How we choose to use modern technology to express ourselves to the broader world sexually is a decision that needs to take into account God’s basic commands regarding human sexuality, our conscience and comfort level based on the understanding of God’s law, and finally the feelings and convictions of our spouses.
Thanks, YC69. Your final paragraph is so well-stated. Succinct and kindly put out there to think about.
Thanks for bringing a biblical perspective to the conversation! I largely agree.
"As a Christian, I do not see why you could not masturbate together, (sexually touching yourselves, not each other). Sitting side by side with your own hands between your legs reading MH – I don’t see why not."
I've actually pondered this quite a bit. The notion of two people (man or woman or mixed) masturbating in the same room, as described above, is akin to the idea of two Christian couples having sex with their respective spouses in the same room. When it comes to two couples having sex in the same room, I don't think there is anything intrinsically wrong with it as long as each person is focused on their own spouse. I don't think there are any biblical prohibitions against this and it was likely much more common in ancient times (even early American history when people lived in one room cabins, etc.).
Let's say two Christian couples are on a roadtrip together and share a hotel room. One couple waits until the lights go out, then gets a little frisky. The other couple overhears this and becomes aroused. So, they decide to have sex too. I don't think there is anything wrong with this as long as their sexual desire is aimed at their own spouse. It's not like they are swapping partners or having a four-some. By analogy, if I look out the window and see another couple taking a walk on a beautiful day, it might inspire me to ask my wife to take a walk, too. As we walk together, the other couple might be just ahead within eyesight and earshot, but we aren't walking with the other couple; we're just walking in proximity to the other couple.
Hypothetically, I think the same principle would apply to masturbating. I don't know of any reason two people couldn't masturbate in proximity to each other, not with each other. Much like the senario above, lets say two ladies are sharing a hotel at a Christian women's conference. While laying in bed, one of them is texting her husband and the texts start to get steamy. Maybe he sends her a MH story to read. She starts masturbating. Although she's trying to be discrete, her friend eventually notices and becomes aroused herself. Maybe she starts sexting her own husband, or maybe she just closes her eyes and enjoys the sexy sounds the other person is making. Either way, she starts masturbating, too. In this scenario, I don't think either woman did anything wrong. So, hypothetically, I think it is biblically and morally permissible to masturbate in the same room as another person in certain circumstances. Practically speaking, though, I don't think it's something Christians should seek out, as it could easily lead to sinful sexual activity.
Again, a well thought out position.
Those are some good thoughts. I am like you on having sex in the same room with another couple, maybe with the lights off, though, lol. We all have embarrassment too much about sex with our spouses. We should be happy for each other that we have sex and enjoy it.
I like your example of masturbating in the same room too. Not something we should really seek out, but if it happens like you describe, probably nothing wrong with it as long as it doesn't go to far. I actually know of a group of women that traveled together, shared bedrooms etc. and they did something like this. My wife was going to go on a trip with them, but I think she was a little shy about sleeping in the same room or bed with another woman. I think our society is way more accepting of women doing something like this than men.
Hope this is a safe place to admit this, but I sometimes Jill Jill via text (and occasionally same room) w a few of my gfs from church. We’re all married. All straight. It’s just sometimes nice to connect with someone who understands in a new way. It’s one of the hottest things I do now after 17 years of marriage. I love hubby and our sex life. And I love my Jill Jill time with my gfs too.
Texashmom, you may not be alone on MH regarding your jill/jill activity! It’s a safe place to admit to your honest comfort with jilling in the company of other loving wives. There may be some who agree with you or disagree.
YC69 (above) put it well by stating …
“How we choose to use modern technology to express ourselves to the broader world sexually is a decision that needs to take into account God’s basic commands regarding human sexuality, our conscience and comfort level based on the understanding of God’s law, and finally the feelings and convictions of our spouses.”
I would add … and the convictions of ourselves.
Wow, that is pretty awesome. So, can I ask how you found others to do this with? How did you get started?
I'd love to hear more about this. As I said above, I don't think it's inherently wrong to masturbate via text or in the same room. At the same time, I can't imagine a situation like this coming about naturally for either my wife or myself. I'd love for my wife to masturbate more and find opportunities like this to enjoy herself. How did this start with you and your friends? When you're in the same room, are you openly in view of each other? Are you reading MH stories? Talking about sex with your spouses? Just curious what this might look like in practice.
Hi Texashmom! I’m entirely straight, but in college a few years back (probably like many others), I jerked off with a friend. It was actually kind of funny. We were just sitting there, each masturbating our own cocks, talking about/showing the techniques we each like, things we find arousing, and my friend ended up blowing his load very quickly. I wanted to edge a bit and he got annoyed at me for taking so long, because I was playing with my balls and nipples and alternating between fast and slow strokes. So he just sat there in the buff and scrolled social media and told me to tell him when I was finally gonna shoot my load. Haha! It was a funny experience, but also one that — at the time — was bonding. Not sure I’d do it again now, but I do have that one experience with it.
Wow that’s incredibly hot to read and made me hard unexpectedly while I was scrolling through the comments and reading. I can only imagine what the messages you’re sending must say! Or you could do a story about it 😉
Actually, that wouldn't likely be a story we'd publish. Per the guidelines: "Stories and comments you submit may only involve sexual escapades between one married heterosexual couple."
I’d love to ask some more questions as well. Not to engage in what you’re talking about necessarily, but I do have questions! Would you be willing to go to The Marriage Bed and make an account to facilitate this?
Ahhh ok good to know! That makes sense. Thanks.
As a single mom, the only person I Jill with is myself. But my best friend, Sara, and I sometimes tease each other and let each other know when we are doing it via text. I did Jill around other girls in high school at church camp a few times though.
It’s often common among very good friends to share via text or email and even phone about their jilling or jacking after doing so, as Lauren42 mentioned. On Christian intimacy web sites that provide for texting or PMs, that sharing or encouragement is quite prevalent.
Interactive, real-time jilling and jacking (not in-person) seems to be a step closer to a more close connection. It seems to me that, if interactive ‘sexting’ happens between two non-married persons, the relationship ought to be platonic or more transactional. That’s not to say the relationship is without trust and connection; that trust and connection ought not to cross pre-established boundary lines.
Hi! I know I’m late to the party on this one but as a mid 20’s single lady waiting for marriage, and after reading some of the comments from single people, it does make me want to chat with them more and get to know their perspective by sharing tips, ways that the opposite sex like to be pleasured or just a platonic relationship where we share ideas. I personally would be so into that. I admit I have “jilled off” reading stories (and yes, even comments) about the other singles or hearing about how the married couples masturbate. Of course for me I like to see so many virgin guys waiting for marriage that are completely okay with talking about how they are jerking off in the comments as it does make us all see clearly the beautiful effects that God’s design for sex has 🙂 I know we can’t PM on this website, so I may check out The Marriage Bed or Songs of the Believers page? This one is my favorite though 🙂 but like a lot of you were saying, everything in moderation!
Hello texashmom,
How did this come about? I am curious if it was discussed or if it happened naturally? My husband encouraged me to reach out. Thanks
A lot of interesting points! It sounds like people are a lot more open to this than I expected. Although I’m not sure why I expected any different, considering it would seem inconsistent to be wholly against. It sounds kind of fun!!
Thank you for your thoughtful comments. Masturbation is not only a wonderful way to experience intense pleasure, it is also very good for one's emotional and spiritual well-being. Masturbation should be encouraged and celebrated. It is one of God's greatest gifts to humankind.
I agree. It is wonderful and I have enjoyed it for many years, lol. There is a lot of social stigma, I guess. I think men that do it are looked at as "can't get the real thing" or at least it feels that way. It is funny, people will talk about sex with their spouse or what they are doing or not doing, but rarely talk about masturbating. It is a great gift, and I feel it is good for you in many ways if it isn't abused.
Wow, it's refreshing to see how many people on this site have really thought this through. And to be reminded of it too, since, as more than one has said, would we expect less on MH?
I have nothing I could add, except this: as long as the desire is first for God and his directives (and not only in regards to sex), and then to our spouse, in order of priority, then there are built in safeguards from there. Each of us has unique and different tastes, and each of us from what I can tell has knowledge of ourselves. At least, so it seems to me. For instance….
I am continually noticing how popular "tasting and swallowing" is, especially but not only on this site. For my "taste" (no wordplay intended), I don't get particularly turned on by reading about that – but I'm glad others find enjoyment and pleasure from it. I can see cumming in some "outrageous" places, and do enjoy fellatio and hand jobs, though.
On the other hand, my wife knows exactly what I love, and she loves it when I talk to her in a particular male, erotic, enticing (in the right away) tone of voice that coaxes her into submission. And again, after we have first submitted to one another, as God directs (Ephesians 5:21).
The relatively little I have shared in stories return to the same theme in what may seem boring or repetitive to others – but not to us. And the relatively few comments as to how hot and steamy those stories are perceived has encouraged me.
I also much prefer the term "ravishing" to "f-ing" in reference to making love, and use the first and third words a lot in bed as well. But when I read a story using the "f-ing" word that I enjoy, I simply substitute my own "r-ing" word – and get the same effect – LOL!
Anyway, hope I didn't get too long winded or late in the discussion. Just my thoughts. And thank you to everyone for yours, especially SilverGold for initiating this.
I don't want to masturbate next to my wife. If she is next to me and we are both horny, we just have sex. I don't want another dude around me doing that to himself. Gross. My wife would not do that with another woman around either.
I prefer sex with her. Fortunately, she is super horny and is almost always game. It's great. I love being horny with her. My hands are always too busy touching her. She loves stroking my cock. I don't need to.
After reading the comments here, I'm glad I'm not alone. I've jacked with guy friends before and felt guilty. And I've chatted with girls who've jilled with their friends. Maybe we need to discuss this more because I'm tired of the guilt and shame feelings
Very good conversation. Excellent points made as well. Our sexual drives are, indeed, a gift from God to be celebrated. Masturbation helped me stay faithful to God and be a virgin for my wife when we married at 25 ( we were both virgins). In junior high, my brother and I jacked with 2 of our neighborhood friends about 6 times over the course of the Summer. No touching or anything. We were all going through puberty at the same time. All are married with kids with healthy marriages. I think jacking together is a common situation with fellas from junior high through college. RisingLoaf, you are spot on. I think alot of guys carry around guilt that should not be there. Like many here have said, we should focus on our spouse while we are masturbating. I think it's healthy and helps maintain that mental acuity that we need, keeping our passion for our spouse alive. My wife knows I edge a ton and is OK with it as she knows I only think about her.
I hope this is ok to say here at MH. I traveled extensively for work and as such being married and faithful to my wife. There were many times I had sexual tension that needed relief. So i have masturbated by my self and on occasion solo with other men in a room and see no problem with it. Watching another man jack off and having an orgasm as I’m doing the same keeping my intent purely on my wife allows release of sexual tension without sin. Many men in their teen years jacked off with other boys in a group or in pairs. As long as it was solo no person to person touching I think this is no different than reading stories and masturbating to these sexual encounters within a marriage being shared. I for one have found a great relief in reading these comments regarding freedom to masturbate. I have come to a conclusion, It not a sin to masturbate alone, together with my wife or in view of others within the context of this discussion that we don’t not cross the boulders of sexual lust for another other than our spouses.
Very honest and thoughtful comment. Many of us jack or jill to stories and comments on MH. It may be by a married or single man to a story by a married woman. Or a single woman to a hot story by a married man. Some guys have jacked off reading and relating to a story about prostate massage. Always thinking about one’s spouse or future spouse or one’s personal pleasure. Some have also focused on themselves in the presence or in conversation with a trusted friend.
Just finished rereading this post in its entirety. Lots of contemplative and well thought out responses that I found very interesting. I have another slant that I’m anxious to see discussed.
Being a senior member in this discussion, it occurred to me that I have friends who have lost spouses to death, or living with a spouse who has Alzheimer’s or other dementia, a spouse who no longer has an interest in united sexual enjoyment secondary to aging, or some other medical condition that has zapped their interest or ability to enjoy sexual delights. These are couples who have been devoted to each other for 45 to 60 years, and remain devoted till death do they part. Now the question: Is it possible that the partner that still throughly enjoys all things sexual, who loves to masturbate, and who enjoys reading MH be able to discuss these feelings by PMing with someone they have never met, and most likely never will meet, or another highly trusted friend regardless whether the person be male or female? If one can read stories and comments and masturbate what would be the difference in chatting with one directly and enjoying masturbating – even making the feelings better?
Like what are you thinking? Chats, talk…in depth conversations…or mutual masturbation?
Based on the final question . . . If one can read stories and comments and masturbate what would be the difference in chatting with one directly and enjoying masturbating – even making the feelings better? . . . I believe the question includes mutual masturbation while chatting.
Thanks Livinit for your thoughtful question regarding seniors that desire/need sex when they face a sexless situation.
Thanks SilverGold for making that correction – that is exactly what I am asking.
I see no problem with two people of the same sex mutually masturbating. I suppose it could be acceptable for two couples to have sex in the same room if the lights were off but I think being able to see each other would be too much temptation. As long as I am not visualizing or fantasizing with anyone other than my spouse, I don’t think I have crossed a line, but I don’t think I could watch another live couple have sex and not fantasize sex with her.
SMF, do you include 2 married men on a business trip in a hotel room or something like that?
I dont see anything wrong with two guys bonding and becoming better friends by masturbating together. Except that it would break my wife's heart. She sees it as having sex with him and a betrayal of our vows. I dont hide things from her. So, for love, I will not do it as long as she lives.
Ok, we all know that same sex intimacy is a sin. Though I will admit that I have fantasized about the scenario a few times, but would never act on it. As far as masturbating with the same sex, I personally don't see anything wrong or sinful as long as it is kept within limits or just self touching and nothing else.
Awhile back, my friend Cynthia and I took a trip to Memphis because she had never been to Elvis Presley's home Graceland and wanted to go. Plus our husband's had gone on a fishing trip in Mexico.
We shared a hotel room which had twin beds. We talked alot of girl talk and had a blast. We also talked about our husband's, how we missed them and our sex lives.
Later that night I was awakened by a noise like a woman's moaning. I looked over at Cynthia to ask if she was ok, and noticed that her panties were on the floor and that she was masturbating. She was covered up, but you could just tell. Seeing and hearing her in the act had me feeling aroused as well. So I slipped my hand between my legs and started playing with my pussy.. Naturally, she was embarrassed that I was awake and was masturbating along with her. Neither of us stopped and to make a long story short, we both experienced an orgasm. We laughed and joked about it and talked of how our husband's would react if they knew( I later would tell Ben about it, but that's another story. )
There wasn't any same sex feelings or intimacy between Cynthia and myself. It was just two married straight women who are the best of friends who missed their husband's and shared something we felt was special.
I will admit that I enjoy reading stories from MH and masturbating to many. I also am guilty of masturbating while writing my own stories as well. As has Ben. As I have said many times, I am a huge advocate for the pleasures and health benefits of masturbation .
We all have the " freedom " to masturbate and shouldn't be ashamed of that fact. It will take time to break down those taboo barriers concerning masturbation. But I believe we are headed in the right direction. Stay horny my friends!
"I will admit that I enjoy reading stories from MH and masturbating to many. I also am guilty of masturbating while writing my own stories as well. As has Ben. As I have said many times, I am a huge advocate for the pleasures and health benefits of masturbation ."
That is as it should be. Good girl.
Thanks, sarah k, for reviving this thread and your encouraging words to enjoy our orgasmic delight!