Keeping the Intimacy

This blog post is simply about keeping the intimacy with your spouse when sexual intercourse isn’t happening.  That can be for any legitimate reason such as disease, erectile dysfunction, injury, etc.  I (the husband) have found this has been very important for me to initiate because of my wife’s disabilities that prohibit intercourse.  It keeps me focused on what’s important in our relationship and our covenant vows.  Naturally the lack of sexual intercourse has caused me to fight a lot of temptations that I wish I never had to fight.  Keeping on target with some of the basics has helped immensely and I’d just like to share these insights that might help others “fight the good fight” to keep your marriage on target.

What I do for my wife:

  1. Watch chic flicks with her on a regular basis.
  2. Really listen to her.
  3. Snuggle.
  4. Read from a romance book to her before we go to sleep.
  5. Hold hands often.
  6. Hug often – a lot!

What I ask my wife to do for me:

  1. Give me lots of sexual touching.
  2. Surprise me by what she CAN do.
  3. Allow me to relieve my sexual tensions without guilt – even encouraging me to do so but always within biblical boundaries.
  4. And finally to remember that I also NEED intimacy from her, not just sexual relief.

Hope this will help and encourage others to keep the intimacy and renew some “heat” in your marriage.



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2 replies
  1. Blondie says:

    When I had both my c-sections I wasn’t able to have sexual intercourse for awhile after each one, that didn’t mean I couldn’t be intimate with my husband. We cuddled a lot, hugged a lot, and reminisced about past sexual encounters with each other. I found nothing wrong with giving him a hand job or take him in my mouth either. Thanks for this post. Touch in and of itself from your spouse and that emotional and friendship connection are so important through all times of marriage.

  2. Loved by my Wife says:

    My wife’s difficult pregnancy & miscarriage have prevented us from intercourse for some time. For me, hand-jobs & time with my face between her breasts get me through each week. As a recovering porn & masturbation addict, I avoid any activity by myself. It is so special when she initiates & ensures my satisfaction.
    For her, dry-humping in the kitchen, back & scalp massages, and cuddling on the couch are very special.

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