The Keeper

The Keeper

The first time I saw my husband, I was twenty-two years old. I knew then that he was “the keeper,” the man I would marry.  For years I prayed that God would show me who I would marry. I prayed that he would speak loudly, make it clear to me like a bolt of lightning.

Until then, I had tried to pretend that the men I previously dated would do, but none of them was the one.  Eventually, I convinced myself that marriage wasn’t in my future. I had sex with man after man at that time of my life. Finally, I humbled myself. I realized that I needed to allow God to run my life and that if I were going to marry, God would send the keeper.  I folded my hands and promised that the next time I had sex would be with the man I married.

Then one day I saw him. He walked right past my table, and I knew. It hit me just like a bolt of lightning, only in my heart, and radiated through my whole body.  I saw him again the next day, and we struck up a conversation. It turned out that we were both supposed to work at the same company in Japan. But at the last minute plans changed. I changed careers, and he found a more lucrative option here in the states.

From that day forward we seldom parted.  A month later we were out with friends, and he asked me, “Will you marry me?”

All my life I had waited for the man of my dreams to propose, and he finally did.  Of course, I agreed. We were married the next month by a Justice of the Peace.

We did not have sex until our wedding night. That evening, we took a walk along the beach to watch the beautiful sunset. It was freezing cold, so we brought along blankets with our champagne.  As we sat watching the glowing orb descend behind the far horizon, I thought back to a youth group meeting where the leader said, “If you pray, God will return your virginity. Truly ask his forgiveness. Because those of you who have been sexually active, you are like a piece of duct tape; once you stick it to so many things, it loses its effectiveness. And that is how your sexual experience will be, but pray to God, and he will return those feelings of the first time.”

So I did exactly that. I prayed that God would give me the opportunity to experience this first time with my husband as if it truly was my first time.

As we strolled to a more secluded location, he kissed me. It was one of those kisses that makes you feel warm, a heat that radiates and pulses through your body.  We continued to kiss and, as he pressed his body against mine, I felt his penis getting hard.

It took my breath away. I had never felt like this before. It made me want to stop time but also speed it up to get to the lovemaking.  As the keeper continued to kiss me, I whispered against his lips,  “I could come just from your kisses.”

“Well I plan to do more than kiss you,” he said, “so I guess you’re in trouble.”

Then we lay down in the sand, him on top of me and his penis was throbbing. It was so hard! I could not wait to get my hands on it.

He rolled off of me, and we took off our clothes for each other. I saw him, and he saw me. It was beautiful.  I felt like Adam and Eve.

I took his penis in my hands and stroked it. His moans melted me. Then I straddled him and rubbed his penis on my vagina. I was incredibly wet; the contact sent a shock coursing through me. I was in a daze.

He told me to wait and asked me to straddle his face.  Oh, wow! His tongue felt delicious against my vagina, slipping in and out. Never before had I felt like that.  I sucked his penis, hoping to communicate and return the pleasure he gave me.

Next, we rolled over. The keeper took each of my breasts in his hands and sucked each nipple diligently as if it were the key to life.  My vagina was blazing, and I practically screamed, “Please put it in me.”

He happily obliged, and as soon as his penis crested the lips of my vagina, Oh my!  That was the most amazing feeling.  I asked him to take it out and put it in again.  This, I knew, this was how sex was supposed to feel.

I felt lost in the intense pleasure, and he kept going.  It didn’t seem like we could get enough of each other.  As he was sliding his penis deeper and deeper into my vagina, I felt a welling inside of me; I had an orgasm from intercourse.  I always had to masturbate to reach orgasm before.  What a release!  It was as if my body had given all it had and wanted to end the fight as all of the love I had for this man effervesced and released like a cork.

The keeper pulled out and started licking me.  He continued to penetrate me with his tongue as I came again.  Then he put his penis back inside of me and, with his last final thrusts, came beautifully inside of me. I loved everything: the weight of his body, the smell of his sweat, the pounding of our hearts together.

Twelve years later, my favorite feelings of sex with my husband are the initial entry and the feeling of being full of his semen.  I am getting hot just thinking about this. I think I am going to masturbate now and be hot as hot for the keeper when he gets home for lunch.

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2 replies
  1. AL says:

    That was beautiful, and God blessed your union even more as though you were that Virgin in waiting, and it was Worth the wait. I too am waiting to experience that Heightened Bliss that God has, all because I choose to wait. Great, and even after 12 years, you're still excited as though it were the 1st time; Fantastic

  2. Deane says:

    THANK YOU for sharing that touching and personal story. I love how you worked God's sexual healing into it! You know, we're supposed to wait. God designed us to wait. And I know that there's an unspeakable blessing for those who do.

    I didn't. I knew better, coming from a solid Christian background, but got lost in the ways of the world in my 20s, lost my virginity and slept with a number of women over a period of eight years or so. I learned the hard way that when God told gave us his rules — ONE man, ONE woman, ONE lifetime, EXCLUSIVE and PERMANENT — he wasn't putting "restrictions" on us to keep us in our place, but boundaries to PROTECT us from harming our souls. And harm my soul I did — although it took quite a while for me to realize that. I had to learn the hard way that sex outside marriage excites for sure, but DOES NOT satisfy, and, in fact, actively undermines genuine satisfaction in the longer term.

    You're female, so you may or may not realize that sexual sin hurts a man as much as a woman. We men are usually less "verbal" and therefore find it harder to articulate it, and I think we men also have an overdose of pride which makes it hard to admit that pain, even to ourselves. But just because we are not sharing it or admitting it doesn't make it any less real.

    How does it affect a man? Many ways, but here is one: it gave me a mechanical view of sex. It became just a mechanism for me to get my orgasm, which was always more exciting inside a woman than a masturbation orgasm. I would have sex just to get my orgasm. MY orgasm. MY, MY, MY orgasm. It became all about ME. If the woman I was with at the time got an orgasm too, I was glad for her, but that wasn't why I was doing it and, after a while, I didn't really care about the woman any more. If she got her orgasm, good, but if not, oh well, who cares as long as I get mine! Sex outside marriage turned me into a selfish man at the very core of my being. (Yes, of course it affected my spiritual life as well, but I think everyone in this community already knows how premarital sex does that, so I won't dwell on it).

    I met the woman of my dreams — a virgin, decided to "clean up my act," and got married. SHE was a virgin on our wedding night, I was far from it. I then suddenly found I had another issue to deal with : guilt. She had kept herself for me, and gave me a priceless gift. I wasn't able to give that to her. The guilt was incredible. I also found myself carrying my selfishness over into the marriage bed : I was used to sex being all about ME and MY orgasm, and I found that had become my default setting. Of course I loved Mary and wanted her to enjoy her orgasms too, but they weren't my priority. She felt — rightly — that sex for me was mechanical and that I wasn't connecting with her in the depths of my soul.

    I came back to the Lord a couple of years later. To cut a long story short, a wonderful healing began. I WISH that someone had been there in the beginning to tell me what your youth pastor told you, dear reader : “If you pray God would return your virginity, truly ask his forgiveness, because those of you who have been sexually active, you are like a piece of duct tape, once you stick it to so many things, it loses it’s effectiveness, and that is how your sexual experience will be, but pray to God and he will return those feelings of the first time.” I want to cry for joy that you had a godly leader to tell you that! Nobody told me that, but in the course of time, GOD did as I studied the scriptures and learned about his grace, his forgiveness, his healing, and his restoration. A wonderful healing came to my sexuality and to our marriage. I learned to focus on GIVING more than TAKING — sex became so much more exciting when I decided to make my wife's pleasure and orgasm my priority, even if it (occasionally) meant missing out on my own! It took time, but God did it. I'm so glad that you heard that from a godly leader BEFORE you got married, so that the Keeper's penis in your pussy really did feel like it was for that very first time! And wow, you're still so excited about it 12 years later that you masturbate to the memory and get an "echo" of that first orgasm you had with him! God bless you, my sister.

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